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How Many Children Do You Need to Have?

Updated on December 9, 2021
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The Eternal Question

A mother may wonder at some stage of her life if she should have one, two or more children. She finds herself surrounded by different opinions. One says” one child is fine”, another says” 2 is nice and don’t have more”, and a third “have whatever number of children you want as long as you can raise them properly” and so on. Many opinions you come across every day and end up confused without knowing how the course of your life with regard to this point should be.


Basically, every option of those mentioned has its pros & cons. If you have one, two or more, you will be comfortable with some points and not satisfied with others in each probability.

When I Was Younger…

We were only two; a brother and a sister. We have always felt we need a third one. When we don't get along with each other, we need another brother or sister with whom we can feel brother/ friend. That was what left us with the feeling of being somehow lonely. Therefore, I have always decided to have at least 3 kids.

What About One Child?

No need to say that one child is challenging decision in a way or another. Its biggest advantage, from my point of view, is focusing all efforts and resources on them exclusively. So, they usually grow up full of love and care. However, they, sometimes, have a horrible feeling of loneliness. Close and best friends play a significant role in their life and may be as sufficiently loving as siblings or even more.

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Many Preferences

If parents have mental, physical and financial capabilities, they can have three, four or whatever number they like, as long as they have the required capabilities for that purpose. Or else, they will suffer badly and will make their children suffer a lot in turn.


Some parents like kids and love to live all their moments and watch them grow slowly. They believe that having a lot of children is a blessing, especially when they get older. They need their support and love when they age.

How Long Should I Wait Between Children?

Let us agree that all the child stages are exhausting particularly to the mom. However, combining caring about a school- aged child, for instance, with a baby is really challenging and needs a great energy and patience.

My Experience

I got very exhausted when I cared about my two daughters with a break of 2 years between them. Nevertheless, I got extremely drained and hollow- eyed when I delivered my baby boy while my daughters were school- aged children. Spending nights with him, breastfeeding issues, changing diapers, etc… whereas, on the other hand, preparing lunch boxes, and setting the girls for the school, receiving them on coming back and lunch, then doing homework is draining. It requires a dynamo mom, and the worse, if the mother works outside home.

My Opinion

Therefore, I feel that having three kids with 2 or 3 year- intervals is a nice idea so when they get older, parents can have consistency while raising them. All needs and wants of their children are the same. And finally, when they grow up, parents have rest without disturbance.


In the end, the decision of children's numbers is variable to everyone’s conditions, capabilities and responsibilities.

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