How To Deal With A Controlling Mother
All They Want Is The Best For Us
Most good mothers tend to try to control you and your actions. This is not because they are power-hungry, it's because they have been there, done that and don't want you to make the same mistakes as they did.
My mother was exactly the same. When I finished High School she begged that I go to College but I rebelled and left home at the age of 16. I had a lot of things going on in my life at that point and I couldn't take the pressure. I do regret not listening to my mother because I am now years behind and all the friends I grew up with have almost graduated College and I know that if I had listened from the beginning, I would be right there with them. There is always time and room for a second chance and I will be fixing what I have broken. My mother insisted that I go to College because when she was that age, she dropped out after 3 months because the pressure at home was too much (her father died soon after and her mother was extremely abusive and violent). My mother has never been abusive or violent towards me or any of my siblings but it does look as though I have followed in her footsteps, mistake-wise.
I noticed my mother began to become a little more controlling as I neared the end of my compulsory education and as I crept closer and closer to turning the age of 16 (which in Australia is the legal age of consent and the age in which you can be legally independent). I guess this is because she feared what I would use that freedom for and was trying desperately to prevent me from doing so. On a guess, most mothers probably fear that. They most likely also fear their children growing up and moving out, especially with their first born child because it is a new experience and they don't really know what to expect. Fear can trigger frustration and anger.
Mothers (and Fathers for that matter) want what is best for their children and sometimes they have a very weird way of showing it. Once you move out and away you will begin to realise their original intent and start to understand exactly why they did what they did and why they went about it the way that they did. We may not even fully understand until we have kids of our own and live through what they have. But just remember, our parents brought us into the world, kept us safe, helped us grow and learn and after all those years of hard work and love, don't you think it would be at least a little bit hard for them to let go? They do, but I imagine it's not easy. Respect them through the good times and the bad and love them through the happy and the sad. We only have so much time to live and only one life to give all that we wish to give. Use it.
