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Important Parenting Skills That Can Help In Disciplining Children
Kids need to be educated at every step and parents should constantly check if children learn properly. But there are no courses available for parenting. The fact is parents have to know many things for being effective and therefore, it can easily be said that all the parents do not have all the skills. It may seem that some parents have all the skills but even these parents may not be consistent. In short, parenting is always work-in-progress.
Parents's ability to use their skills solely depends upon the age and behavior of their children. Further, parents can learn or sharpen their skills only by making constant efforts. Parents can now acquire the knowledge, information and skills from the materials available on the Net. While every skill is important for parenting, there are a few that are more important than others because these skills will help them in promoting discipline in their kids.
- Effective parenting involves recognizing dangers much earlier and taking suitable and timely action. At the same time, parents should refrain from over-protecting their children also. They should strike a balance between subjecting the kids to dangers and over-protecting them. Only when they are sure that the children can be safe, they can allow them to face natural consequences. By adopting such an approach, they can gradually teach the children how to make healthy and judicious decisions.
- Many parents commit the mistake of preaching one thing and practicing the opposite. Only if they set an example by preaching and practicing the same thing, they can discipline their children. For example, children learn to yell at others only if parents have this habit. It cannot be "I can yell; but you should not." Parents who practice what they say will be good examples and children will also learn this by watching them.
- Parents need not always be their children's friends. When children are angry with them or when they protest, they should allow them to do so. The best approach is to think through, decide what is good for the children and focus only on such things even if children do not like them. There should be clear rules and children should be made to understand them.
- The most ineffective way of disciplining children is not to follow through with consequences. If parents threaten children of consequences, they should consistently follow them through. Otherwise, children will come to know that their parents may not or will not execute the threats. Because of this wrong approach, parents can never discipline the children. Apart from adopting the right approach, parents should necessarily ensure that children know the consequences.
- Parents should never wage unwise battles with children. If they constantly find fault with them and fight with them, children may stop listening to them. So, parents should think if harping upon trivial things and finding fault with children is worth the efforts.
- Experts have found that stressed out parents are not able to handle their children properly. Hence, parents should learn how to manage their stress effectively. By doing so, they can adopt consistent and effective strategies for disciplining their children. Stressed out parents may unnecessarily yell at their kids or may not be consistent in their approach.
- The most important point is that parents should spend a good amount of time with their children. They should listen to them attentively and allow them to ventilate their feelings and opinions. Parents should never thrust their opinions on the kids. If children are wrong in their opinions, parents should make them understand the right points gently and in a subtle manner. If they spend time with them and listen attentively to them, children can easily be disciplined.
- Kids should be made to understand that parents have certain expectations from them. While handling small kids, parents should give simple and clear instructions because these small kids may not understand difficult ones. "Keep your books in the shelf", "Put your toys in the basket", etc. are good examples of clear instructions.