- Family and Parenting
Who Is the World's Worst Grandmother?
Look in Websters dictionary under "Worst Grandmother," and you will see my picture. Well at least that's what I've said over the years. You see, I was never anxious to be a grandmother. I had always told my children, that they didn't have to give me grandchildren. I was not clamoring to have grandchildren, because it appears that today more grandparents are becoming new parents in their retirement years, and I didn't want to become one. Now, wait a minute, this is not going to turn out the way you think, be patient, hear me out. I digress. I always wanted my retirement years to be free of "encumbrances," as I referred to grandchildren, not just because they were that, but in a lot of cases that's the way it turns out. Meaning that grandparents end up raising their children's children and in that case they become a burden. In my case I thought that Murphy's law would kick in, you know, if it can happen, it will.
Motherhood is one of my proudest achievements, I have five beautiful children. So you see I love children. But I have looked forward to having my freedom while I was still young enough to enjoy it. During the time that I was raising my children, we never had a time when we didn't have them with us. You see, my husband didn't want them to go to their grandparents, without us. So all of our vacations were spent with our children. I had no more than three days at a time without the children under foot. My children were spread out over nineteen years,(the oldest and the youngest are nineteen years apart), therefore I had thirty years of raising children to adulthood.
So I was determined not to be a grandmother, or I would at least be the worst one around. I didn't intend to always have them under foot, always "grandma this, and grandma that." I wanted to be free! I have a "bff", (oh shut up, I'm not too old to say that), who is one of the most doting grandmother's I've ever seen, always with the photos on her phone, showing them off. I'll call her Allison, because that's her name, she makes me sick, all the time with those pictures, and just talking about those grandchildren. Please give me a break! I was determined not to be like that, how sickening.
When the oldest grandson came along, he lived mostly with us, even when he wasn't living with us he was always here. So he was like a sixth child, he called me "Mom," and his grandfather "Dad," so, I didn't feel like a grandmother.
Now my second oldest son had his first
child, a daughter, about four years ago. Because they lived a distance, I
still didn't feel like a grandmother, and besides she didn't seem to
like me, anyway. Well that was okay, I didn't intend to be the doting
grandmother anyway. Then the second one came along (the same son),
about eighteen months later. Oh no, she looked like my mother, and that
smile, for her grandmother, oh my goodness. Now when the oldest one saw the interactions between me and her sibling, needless to say she warmed up to me. I still wasn't convinced that being a grandmother was the greatest thing. But then a third one came along, and we began spending more time together. Wouldn't you know, it began, the meltdown. Now, wait a minute, that's not all, I now have a boarder and she has a sweet, sweet, little girl, that calls me grandma, with that cute little voice. As you can see I'm beginning to become toast. I now understand Allison a little more.
These are the most beautiful little girls in the world, not just their physical appearance , although they are, but their dispositions are so beautiful. Uh, oh, am I beginning to sound like Allison? In my defense, those girls are thieves, every time I see them they steal a little bit of my heart. I have pictures. Want to see? Their parents are training them well, they are so well mannered and well behaved, at least at my house.
I have a special drawer for the jewelry and hair ornaments that I dedicated to them. When they come to visit they know their drawer, oh yes and I have a bag of dresses that they also use. We never tire of playing dress-up, oh so much fun. You should hear them talk, they have the most beautiful little voices you've ever heard. Their expressions are so cute too. Take the second, she was explaining about the picnic they had gone on, she said "grandma,the other day we went on a picmic, and we played on the swings at the picmic."
The oldest is only four and knows how to count to 100 plus, she knows her alphabets and lots more. The youngest girl about two, can count and also say her alphabets. Actually all three, because they are so close in age are learning at about the same pace. This is due in no small part to her mother's attention and diligent dedication to all of the children. I applaud my daughter-law for the way she's raising the children, that makes it so easy to be, well, a "good grandmother," oops, did I say that out loud. Good grandmother, good grandmother. That sounds good, I could get use to that.
Where I thought that I didn't want grandchildren, I find myself eagerly anticipating their every visit. They have a little brother now, I'm just waiting to see how he takes to me. I am already mush, with the others,(and my newest play granddaughter), one more will just do me in. Even though the oldest grandson is living with me again, I still feel like he is my son, I know that he is not, so I acknowledge that I have five grandchildren. This grandmother thing is just the best. See I told you it would end differently than it started out. So Mr. Webster, you can just take my picture down, I no longer fit the description of the World's "Worst Grandmother."