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What They Don't Tell You About Pregnancy

Updated on August 19, 2019
Amber Akers profile image

After going through my own trials of pregnancy, I hope this can help other women considering to become pregnant.

Pregnancy Honesty

Every pregnancy is different. Some are easier and some come with more complications. I am speaking from my experience of pregnancy. Before I was pregnant, it was spoken about as this beautiful amazing thing. Don't get me wrong pregnancy is beautiful and amazing, but it can come with some hard times. I think these hard times need to be spoken about more so that women are more prepared for it.

Pregnancy Struggles

  • Morning Sickness: I had the most misconception about this side effect. From research and speaking to other mothers, it was mostly brushed off as you will occasionally get sick but it is no big deal. My sickness was not in the morning, it was mostly in the evening. For three months I would get sick after every dinner. It got to the point where I would choose dinners that were bland because I knew that it was going to come up. The less acidic the better. I suggest avoiding orange juice and vinegar-based foods/dressings.
  • Nausea: This was the hardest symptom to adjust to. The nausea did not go away until the middle of the second trimester. It was not bursts of nausea and then go away. It was constant throughout the day. The easiest way for me to describe it is when you have a really bad flu and the feeling you get right before you throw up but you do not throw up. It is worse because once you throw up you get some relief, but with this, you never get that relief.
  • Sleep: I thought sleeping became an issue once the baby arrived. However, I was way wrong. Towards the end of pregnancy, I was lucky to get a few hours of sleep. I tried a pregnancy pillow but it did not help. I was better off using multiple pillows and adjusting them as necessary.
  • Tiredness: This was due to not sleeping well. I took a nap almost every day during my second and third trimester.

Additional Obstacles

  • Round Ligament Pain: This was a sharp pain in my lower belly. It is caused by your belly stretching. I found that a cold pack can help with this. I would have preferred a heating pad, but you need to be careful with heat around your belly.
  • Judgment: This one was very surprising to me. I did not expect the amount of judgment I received, especially from other mothers. It was anything from what I ate to what activities I participated in. Everyone provided their opinion on what they thought I should do because it was what they did.
  • Food Aversions: I did not know that just the smell of certain foods would make me throw up. My most memorable food aversion was Mexican food. Thankfully, this ended in the third trimester because it is one of my favorite types of food.
  • Heartburn: It did not matter what I ate, I would always get heartburn. Once it started, it did not end until I gave birth. Tums were the only thing that helped. I preferred the assorted fruit flavor. This particular chewable tablet did not make my nausea worse and worked the best to rid my heartburn.
  • Back Pain: Mine was typically located in my lower back. It was caused by the added weight. Back rubs were the only thing that really helped.
  • Braxton-Hicks: These are false contractions and I only felt them towards the end of my third trimester. They felt like real contractions but were inconsistent. Focusing on my breathing is what got me through them.

All of these challenges become more difficult because for most of them there really is not much you can do about it. When you are pregnant you can not take most pain relievers so you would need to find natural ways that work for you. Since everyone is different it can take a little trial and error before finding what works for you. I would just make sure it is approved by your doctor first.


Acceptance

Even with all of these symptoms, I would go through it all again to have my baby girl. I am grateful to have had my daughter. I know some women have great difficulty getting pregnant or may not get pregnant at all, but I think we should stop making pregnant women feel guilty for talking about the difficulties of pregnancy. We already feel guilty for having these thoughts ourselves we do not need additional shame for wanting to share our thoughts on the challenges of pregnancy. I found another mom that was okay with me venting about my hardships of pregnancy and she did not make me feel any guilt. Just the ability to share these challenges with her gave me relief that I was not the only one feeling this way. I hope sharing my difficulties can help another expectant mother out there feel the relief that I felt.

This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.

© 2019 Amber

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