- Family and Parenting»
Young Ladies.....are You Throwing Away Your Decency and Dignity
Define, decency and dignity
I looked up the words, decency and dignity and here's what I found. Decency: conforming to the recognized standards of propriety, good taste, modesty, etc. Synonyms: decorum, respectability, gentility. Decencies: state or moral proprieties. Dignity: bearing conduct or speech indicative of self-respect or appreciation of the formality or gravity of an occasion or situation. Dignities: the quality or state of being worthy of esteem or respect, poise and self-respect. Did I go to sleep and wake up in another century where the meaning of these words are somehow archaic?
What I See
Looking around, we see young ladies behaving in a manner that belies the rules of decency and dignity. Everywhere we look, we see skimpily clad young ladies, and in some cases I mean young, some as young as ten. Provocative dress appears to be the order of the day, where our young ladies are concerned. Not just dress, their actions speak volumes about how they feel about decency and dignity. They pattern themselves after the popular entertainers of the day. You see the operative word here is "entertainers." In my day (oh, here I go dating myself), we were entertained by people in certain styles of clothing, but we didn't emulate their particular style of dress. Their actions were also just for the stage.Apparently those things have come out of the theater and landed squarely on our streets, and they've found their way into the lives of our young ladies. Looking around in the world we live in, I do believe, to a lot of our young ladies, decency and dignity have lost their meaning.
Wouldn't you know it, the moral decay of this world has taken a heavy toll on our daughters and sisters. Oh, but it didn't begin with them, some of our mothers and even grandmothers are leading the pack. Whatever happened to leaving something to the imagination? Believe it or not the appeal is in the unseen, not the all revealing. Have you ever heard the expression, "a woman to take home to mother?" No matter how degraded the world becomes that statement still remains a fact, for a lot of decent young men. There is a saying that I heard, 'I was looking for the perfect man, but what do you know, when I met him, it didn't work out because he was looking for the perfect woman." Let's apply that to decency and dignity. If what you are looking for is a decent and dignified man, what are you bringing to the table. You see when you are ready to settle down you will have to bring to the table like for like. Might I add, the competition is fierce, so you must be prepared. Now that might smack of chauvinism, but the facts are the facts, what can I say. Well, you might say, "some men want beauty." Is there beauty in the skimpy or indecent clothing, or bawdy actions. I'm not saying that men are not attracted to that, but think, if you "catch" a man that way, do you really want him? You see beauty and a good body can fade. The kind of man that you want for the long haul is one that sees you for who you are on the inside. Now I'm not pretending that looks completely take a back seat, to be truthful no man walks up to a woman and says, (on the first meeting), "oh what a beautiful heart you have." You see we are visual creatures, by nature, so physical attraction is just the beginning. Notice that I said physical attraction, not beauty, because as they say "beauty is in the eye of the beholder." Now that is a whole topic in itself. Back to the issue at hand, self-respect and decorum, when these are used as a touchstone, then decency and dignity will reign supreme.
What we can do
Those of us who have, over the years, kept, or regained, our decency and dignity have a serious responsibility to our young ladies. We can mentor them through, teach, talk, and listen. We can teach by word and example. Our dress and actions can be the example, our words can be those of encouragement and praise. Our talk can be with the intention of impressing upon them the importance of maintaining their decency and dignity from birth to death, or regaining it when it has been lost through ignorance. We can also let them know that their dress and actions can define who they are. We can listen, by sincerely tuning in to their expressions, not judging them, drawing them out, and truly listening in silence. Yes, we have a serious responsibility to help our young ladies maintain or regain their decency and dignity. Can we do it? Yes we can!
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