7 Powerful Ways to Be a Positive Influencer
1. Trust is the foundation
Trust is the very foundation of any relationship.
If there is no trust there is no relationship and where there is no relationship, there is no influence.
First of all, you must build trust before you try to influence somebody.
Trust can be built by helping the people and by serving them. Let them know that you have their best interests in all that you do for them.
2. Be a good listener
An influencer has to be a very good listener.
Listening is an art that not all know. It takes skill and patience to develop this art.
People want someone to listen to them. There are many solution providers but very few real listeners.
People will give anything just to have someone’s ear for just a few minutes.
There are different levels of listening.
Superficial listening: Here, the listener is hearing but not paying any attention. His focus is somewhere else.
Partial listening: Here the listener is hearing but not really responding.
Deep listening: In this type of listening, the hearer is all attention. He is engrossed in the speaker’s conversation and tries to understand what is being said.
Interestingly, in deep listening, the speaker is also aware that the listener is giving his full attention to him.
Any influencer must attain this level of listening to have a real influence on others.
3. Be genuinely concerned
Show genuine concern to people and then you will be able to influence them.
People will respond to those who are interested in their concerns and show it.
Be concerned about other people’s problems and issues.
Spend time with them and give solutions to their problems. This will cause them to respect and trust you.
Ultimately they will be open to your influence because they trust you.
4. Solve their problems
As mentioned in the previous section, people will trust you when you show them your care and concern.
This care should manifest itself in solving their pressing problems.
Learn what is troubling them and then suggest practical and simple solutions to them.
5. Get to know them
Getting to know people is one sure way to influence them.
People are vulnerable to those who seek to know them in a deeper way.
Build a friendship with them and let it be a genuine one.
People can smell a fake from a mile. So be real and genuine.
Let them reveal their fears and concerns to you.
Just give a listening ear and show interest in their lives.
Enquire about their work and their families. Ask real and personal questions to get to know them better.
The more you get to know them, the more they will divulge details about their cares and concerns to you.
The more this happens, the more you will be able to influence them.
Just make sure that you keep the information confidential as any breach of trust will finish the friendship and influence.
6. Serve them
Just go ahead and serve them. Have a humble attitude and help them in whatever way you can.
Make them feel important and significant.
If you can make them feel important, they will do anything for you.
Doesn't everybody want to feel important? No matter what their financial or social position is, all crave for importance and when you give it to them, you have influence over them.
For example, if you command a helper to sweep your office, he will do it but out of duty.
On the other hand, if you appreciate him by saying, “ you are so helpful and your cleaning work makes the office look so clean and beautiful. I would have cleaned the office myself but work pressure does not permit me.”. Do you think you even need to tell him to clean the office?
That is influence gained by your humility and servant attitude.
7. Touch their heart
One of the ways to gain influence with people is to touch their hearts and emotions.
You must connect with them emotionally.
Find things that are common between you and then establish a connection around those things.
For example, if both of you like golfing, talk about golfing for some time. As you do this, the person will open up gradually since now he can trust you.
If you can touch people’s hearts and emotions, they will allow you into their lives and that will give you the power to influence them.
These are some ways that you can influence people. Now remember that when we are talking about influence, we are not talking about manipulation or domination.
Those are two very dirty words. We are not wanting to run someone's life. We just want to be a positive influence in their lives in order to help them.
Thus, if you use your influence to help and serve people better, it is the best way to use it.
This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.
© 2020 Nitin Khaire