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A Kiss is Not Just a Kiss

Updated on September 21, 2020

Down at the Pub One Evening

"No, I don't think I will kiss you, although you need kissing, badly. That's what's wrong with you. You should be kissed and often, and by someone who knows how."

-Rhett Butler

So there I was again, at The Corner Pub, minding my own business, as I do. Christina seemed a bit tense. She had all evening. I was watching her when Holly, the table waitress on Saturday nights, walked up. She put her tray down and said, "Well, that's it for me tonight, honey. All that's left is the Casanova at table five."

The two looked over at the table as did I. There sat a fellow of a certain age and status. At his table had been four women. Now there remained one. She stood up to leave and he proceeded to attend to her as he had with the others. He first embraced her with a hug and then they kissed. Not just a peck on the lips, but a full on kiss on the lips that might have include a little extra, if you know what I mean.

Christina and Holly made that sound women make to each other that gives the sign of disapproval. They looked at each other snickering and shaking their heads.

Holly then asked, "You seem a bit... bothered or something. Is everythin' alright?"

"It's Bobby."

"I thought y'all were gettin' along fine."

"Oh we are, but..."

"He's messing around on ya, right?"

"No!" Christina quickly replied. "We get on just swimmingly... when he's in town."

Now I've never met this 'Bobby' but I'm sure that I wouldn't like him. After all, I have a certain amount of fondness for Christina and feel that our relationship is a special one. But she is free to do as she wishes. Lord knows I do.

Holly quizzed her. "How long has he been gone?"

"Two weeks."

"A fortnight. Big deal. Chad and I have been apart from each other for as much as six months."

"That's different."

"Why? Because he was in County Lock Up.?" She glared at her then changed her expression to more of friendly look. "Look, when your man is gone, he's gone. Don't matter where to. He's just gone. And it do get lonely. When's he to be home?"

"Tomorrow. Tonight, maybe. But probably tomorrow."

"Well sweetie, it'll all be better then and your look of a cow that just sucked on a lemon will disappear. Now, I gotta so. My momma can only stay awake just so long and Chad, Jr. can easily out last her. If'n he does... well it just never turns out good. I'll see you next Saturday. Okay?"

"Yeah... and any other night you might want to come in."

"We'll see how it goes. By the time I'm done helpin' the old man on the crab boat this time a year I'm pretty spent. Good night, doll... And look, he'll be home tomorrow." She patted Christina's hand. "It'll be all good then, you'll see." With that she turned and left towrds the door, almost bumping into 'Casanova's' lady friend.

Now it was Christina, Casanova and me. He pushed the chairs in, collected what stuff he had on the table and walked up to the bar.

"She said to settle up with you. I did leave her a tip but I wasn't certain how long I'd be."

Christina smiled at him. But I knew that smile. She was sizing him up. Finally she asked, "Do you always do that?"

This question seemed to catch him off guard. "Do what, m'dear?"

"There were four women at your table."

"Oh yes, they're friends that seem to like hanging out with me from time to time. Merely friends. That's all." He pulled out his wallet. "How much do I owe for the evenings' beverages?"

"Friends? You kissed them."

"What? Oh, yes. I suppose that I did. Just friends. Nothing more."

"But you kissed them all! And I mean really kissed them" she said with a bit of accusation in her tone.

"Yes. And?"

"You don't see a problem with that?"

"I see it as my contribution to community health care."


"Do you not know the advantages to kissing?"

"Advantages? All it's ever done for me is give me the flu and often just led to the eventual breaking of my heart."

"My dear, there are so many benefits to kissing, for example it's a natural relaxer."

She gave that look where her head cocks sideways and her right eyebrow raises into an arch. "Relaxer? Reeeealllllly... how?"

"Let's say that you've had a busy day, as we all often do, and now it's time to switch gears. But, because of the hustle and bustle a certain amount of adrenaline and sugars are still floating about in your system. Well, a nice tender and maybe long kiss triggers a chemical called oxytocin which is a natural calming agent that makes you feel good. And what's more, a good series of long and passionate kisses..."

"Or a the beginnings of a make-out session." she inserted.

"Okay, as you say... the beginning of a good 'make-out' session will release dopamine's that increases those romantic feelings and just helps you to feel even better. Of course, a good 'make-out' session can lead to another benefit."

"Besides getting to second base..."

"My dear, we are just talking about kissing and the beginnings of a good make-out session."

"Okay. I'll bite. What else does it do?"

"It's good for your heart."

"Why, because it makes your heart race?"

"Maybe that, but the more you kiss, less are the chances that you will have high blood pressure or high cholesterol because kissing increases happiness in a relationship and lowers stress."

I could tell that Christina was thinking of cons to his theory. "So I said that I would get the flu. How is that healthy?"

"Because it boosts your immune system."

"You're crazy."

"Did you get a flu shot this year?"

"Of course."

He smiled. "It's the same thing - just in a smaller dose. You see, in a recent medical journal it was posted that kissing can and does bump up your immune system as you take on germs and viruses that you normally might not encounter. Additionally, for a woman this is great news as kissing can prevent you from contracting cytomegalovirus which in pregnant women can cause birth defects and blindness in infants. Also it a possible cure for allergies as it slows down the growth of IgE antibodies in your blood. If that weren't enough it decreases cavities, that is if you slip your recipient a bit of tongue."


"By kissing in this manner the increased saliva, or spit..."

"I know what saliva is."

He smiled. "Of course you do. Because of the rise in your spit levels, bacteria is washed away and bacteria is the prime cause for decay and cavities as well as plaque build up. Those who kiss a lot usually have good teeth. How many filling do you have?"

She was in thought about what he had just said and spontaneously answered. "None." Then quickly corrected her response with, "I mean, none of your business."

He smiled at her with a bit of imp on his face. He started to open his wallet when he said, "And it's great exercise."

"Making out?"

"Well, the kissing part. You see you use 30 different muscles when you kiss and just like doing push ups or crunches kissing keeps the face fit and trim - in shape. Plus you burn two to six calories when you kiss for a minute or so. That's a half a glass of wine in an hour." He smiled and made his eyes wide and chuckled a bit. "And it is believed that kissing your partner in the morning and then again in the evening can add five years to your life."

She was still digesting all that he had said. "All that from kissing? Who knew?"

"I did, m'dear. How much do I owe you?"

Christina shook her self out of thought and looked at his tab. "$57.50."

"Not bad. A trip to the physician would have set me back much more and most likely wouldn't have been nearly as enjoyable. Not a bad health plan, huh?" She slipped her a few bills. "Thank you and keep the change. Good night to you, m'dear." He turned to leave.

As he was almost to the door she called to him. He turned around. She smiled and said, "Thanks for the info."

He smiled. "Of course, of course." Then he blew her a kiss, turned and walked out into the night.

She stood there staring where he had just been when a shadow became illuminated from the dark. He was well over six foot tall and seemed to be fairly muscular. And from what I know from females, seemed to fall into that category that some women would call, and I quote, "a hunk". He did have a nice smile.

"Did I miss last call?"

Christina's eyes grew wide and a smile the size of a catfish spilled across her face. "Bobby!"

So he was Bobby. I pretended to not be interested in him. But I was still keeping an eye on him. She ran out from behind the bar and greeted him with a great hug and kiss. "Welcome home, baby."

He seemed to be unaccustomed to this behavior. "Wow-wee. I should be gone more often."

"Oh no you don't need to be gone more often." she beamed at him. "Let me close up and we'll go home to my place and you can get me healthy."

A puzzled look can across his face. "Do what!?!"

She just smiled at him and said, "I'll explain later."

As I went to sleep, I thought about the 'kissing Casanova man' and what he had said. While the information was interesting and probably true, but I think that the reason people really kiss is because they like it. The rest is just gravy.

How to Kiss Properly

#1 Take it slow. Don’t jump into the kiss. Take it slow and even if you start off with a kiss on the lips, don’t focus just on the lips. Move your lips away slowly after a first few kisses on the lips and graze your lips against your partner’s neck or chin. Breathe into your partner’s skin and you’ll feel a lot more romantic and sensual. Spend a while warming each other up to a good kiss and take it slow.

#2 Linger between kisses. When both of you start kissing, kiss each other for several seconds at once without forcing your way in. Don’t worry about how long the kiss lasts as long as you feel comfortable.

Don’t stick your tongue into your partner’s lips immediately. Take your time and test the water by playing it slow. Always wait for your partner’s reciprocation before going too far. Take time between each kiss by parting your lips from your lover but keep them really close, almost at the point of kissing again.

#3 Touch each other’s face. A passionate kiss involves more than just the kiss. As you kiss each other, touch your partner’s face and shoulders with your hands. You could also clasp your partner’s hands with yours, just as long as everything you do is subtle and delicate

#4 Don’t be distracted. When you’re kissing someone passionately, you need to stop getting distracted by anything else. Just close your eyes and enjoy the sensation. If you’re distracted, your partner won’t feel the intimate connection and would end up experiencing a less than pleasurable kiss.

#5 Passion isn’t just experienced on the lips. If you want to know how to kiss passionately, you need to remember this fact. A kiss is just a kiss. It’s what you do while kissing that makes a kiss passionate. While kissing your partner on the lips, part the kiss to move your face lower and kiss your partner’s ears, chin, and areas around their lips and even the neck.

Courtesy of


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