ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel
  • »
  • Health»
  • Mental Health»
  • Personality Disorders

Are There More Female Narcissists Than Male?

Updated on June 28, 2016

I get many comments about using male pronouns in my articles and in my online show. Most are from men who want to let me know that there are more female narcissists than men, or that using male pronouns somehow translates to my excusing female narcissists. Before I address that, let me clarify what I have already said many times in many articles and in many episodes of the show: I only use pronouns for the ease of talking and understanding, and it should in no way imply that narcissists can only be male. It just makes explaining it easier and more natural-sounding. "Partner" cannot be used because the narcissists in some people's lives are their parents, or their children, or their siblings or their co-workers. It could even be a neighbor they have only talked to once who decided to go on a smear campaign against them, or someone they went on one date with who has become fixated on them because of a rejection. The word "partner" does not fit. Nothing fits, so I just use a generic pronoun and I use the same one in every article for consistency. If someone is so hung up on a word that it becomes the focus of the entire thing, they are missing the point by a mile. It's a word. It is not that important. The information given in these articles is the important part - and it applies to any and all narcissists equally.

So... are there more female narcissists than male ones? Statistics say no. Historically, statistics have overwhelmingly colored narcissists as male, with some reporting up to 75% of narcissists as male. I myself have not encountered this. I myself have met just as many female narcissists as I have males. In fact, I grew up with two female narcissists - and they are every bit as diabolical and difficult as their male counterparts, so I see no distinction in this area whatsoever. Narcissism does not play favorites. It affects people of any and every gender, race, age, ethnicity, sexuality and relationship. Again, getting hung up on gender here is trivial and distracting. It misses the point of the work completely. This is not about which gender is worse. It is about learning to recognize narcissists. It is about recovering from narcissistic torture and abuse, or surviving it when you are in it.

Should we believe the aforementioned statistics? It's hard to say. My experience has not lent them any credibility, I will say that. It is perhaps similar to statistics regarding Borderline Personality Disorder. Borderline Personality Disorder is considered to affect females by an overwhelming majority. This is absolutely, unequivocally not true. Some theories suggest that part of the reason for this skewing of statistics regarding BPD is the idea that "women with BPD often end up in the doctor's office, whereas men with BPD often end up in prison." Part of this is cultural: if a woman begins screaming and breaking things or assaults her husband, her husband may feel that she needs help because she is having a breakdown or because things are not right and he may push her to seek help. If a man begins screaming and breaking things or assaults his wife, his wife may call the police. Both of these are examples of Borderline rage, but they are dealt with differently by spouses and family and it often depends on the gender of the person acting out. Fair or unfair, this is the way of things. This is not to say that Borderline men never seek help and Borderline women never go to prison, of course. It's just a general example.

Another part of the problem may be that the way men and women act out is often different. Women with BPD may scream and cry and go into hysterical fits of rage or threaten suicide but never actually physically hurt anyone, whereas men with BPD may react with physical violence. Because this is a "different" behavior, the man is perhaps not recognized as suffering from BPD. It's a multi-faceted situation colored by a lot of things and narcissism statistics are likely the same. Because women don't always behave in the ways that are historically and culturally associated with pathological narcissism in men, it may be that the disorder is not recognized, causing statistics to be skewed.

These things are the reason I do the work that I do. Statistics are great, but they do not apply to real life. These articles are designed to help you recognize and deal with the narcissist in your real life, regardless of their gender, age, sexuality or anything else. If you think the person in your life cannot be a narcissist because they are a woman, you are wrong. If you think the person in your life cannot be a narcissist because they are a man, you are wrong. Forewarned is forearmed and the more information we have, the better we can defend ourselves. If we get too hung up on minor details, the big picture only gets dimmer.

Comments

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • Tammy L Andersen profile image

      Tammy L Andersen 24 months ago

      I would have to say absolutely Not. I've known to many men Narcissist. But who am i to judge.

    working

    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: "https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr"

    Show Details
    Necessary
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Features
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Marketing
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Statistics
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)