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Become Unbreakable- the Vital Baby Steps to Develop Extreme Mental Strength

Updated on July 2, 2020
Sowrabha Mahesh profile image

An NLP Coach,healer, meditator and Nature lover I believe that we have the power to make life simple, happy and achieve all that we wish to.

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You were once a baby.. we all were. And what a blast we had. Within the first two years we transformed from a wailing helpless baby (who still knew how to get things done) to a crawler and then a walker and incessant talker. A transformation nothing short of fantastic.

We fell down a thousand and more times, scratched our shin, hurt all possible joints but never gave up. We never let our parents fear that we might fall, get to us. We gave them the sweetest of smiles and then moved right on. After all, we were on a massive mission.

No criticism and negativity ever got to us. After all we were on a massive mission. If this is not mental strength, what is. This was our original programming and yet as we grew older, how much farther we seem to have moved away from that. So mental strength is nothing new. We are naturally endowed with it. What we so easily and intuitively understood as babies, now it is time to reawaken that hidden super ability.

So that brings us to the next question. How does one reclaim that lost treasure? What is it that makes some people extremely mentally strong and resilient and some not so much? Let us dive deep and see for ourselves.

What is mental strength?

It is easy to see the body and understand physical strength. So how do we define a person as physically strong? Stamina, endurance, can take knocks and physical hurts with some level of ease, has a high threshold for pain, has a strong immunity.

Now let us try to understand mental strength using pointers from the body

  • Manage difficult and different situations with a level of ease
  • Manage emotional ups and downs without hurting
  • Face life’s obstacles keeping the spirit flying high
  • Fall but pick up and move on

When the going is good everybody seems mentally strong. It is only when tragedy strikes or the going gets tough that one gets a reality check…..

But, take heart for it is possible to cultivate mental strength - unbreakable at that by using simple , easy to do practices. These practices are culled from learnings from the masters, personal practice, learnings from life.

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1. Become Aware

Awareness is the first stepping stone in every inner journey. When a sportsman starts working on his body to achieve success in his game, he would definitely concentrate on what he puts in his mouth.

Now look at your mind. First thing, you can’t look at it. So complicates matters. In the beginning, start interrupting your thoughts every half an hour and peek at what your mind is up to. Slowly and steadily, it becomes a practise and this means that you have …

2. Become an Observer

The journey to power starts when we realize that we are not our thoughts and we are far more powerful than our thoughts. We are not our feelings either. This is a small part of the totality of what we are.

Grab a few moments from the day and close your eyes. Imagine you are outside of your body watching you. See yourself talking to your friends. Look at yourself looking angry. A lot of things about ourselves become clearer and this is further aided when you…

3. Maintain a journal

A journal can help in innumerable ways. A journal can be your confidante, companion and guide. When angry or in the heat of any negative emotion, start writing it out. This helps in two ways- the very act of writing will help your anger to fizzle out plus you start to understand your own triggers.

The key points that should be recorded in the journal are – what makes you happy, what makes you sad, what hurts you, what stresses you out, things that you are grateful about, disappointments, arguments, what are your repeated behaviour patterns, harmful mental habits, the people who trigger positive and negative thoughts and feelings.

This will help you in acquainting yourself with your strengths and weaknesses on a deeper level and getting to know yourself really well. Now starts the interesting work and here your first stop should be to ...


4. Have a goal

This cannot be emphasized enough. A goal gives a direction to your energy and will give the necessary motivation to get up and get going. Any goal is fine - whether big or small. It could be a long-term goal such as setting up a 10-million-dollar company or a seemingly small one such as getting up half an hour early every day.

With a goal we become like an arrow with a laser-head.!!! But remember stick to one singular goal which can be broken into smaller goals.

5. Learn from people around you

Inspiration abounds around us in all forms, shapes and colors. This is the story about a lady called Subbamma Married at age 9 in the year 1935 and widowed at age 20. She had no children and things were looking very bleak as she seemingly had no one to support her. Family riddled with poverty at both sides- parents and in-laws.

This, however didn’t deter her spirit one bit. She made herself useful to all around her. She was a midwife, the one who cared for women who had just delivered babies and their mothers as well in the crucial first three months, the one who could be depended upon to take care of any ailing person in the family or to help out a large family gathering. This helping nature endeared her to many and soon people she could call family grew.

I met Subbamma at a friend’s place and I was fascinated with this 80-year-old who had the enthusiasm and innocence of a child and a kind word and a helping hand for everyone around her. She received innumerable calls from people seeking her advice, opinion and suggestions. When I got to know about her background and tragic past, I was startled. The beaming happy face in front of me had seen just too much pain and yet none of it showed on her smile-wrinkled face. Here was a true lotus blooming beautifully above the muddy waters.

10 years ago, at the age of 84 she passed away and the large gathering of people at her funeral was a silent but powerful testimony to the great number of lives she had touched. ‘When life gives you lemon, make lemonade’. There are a number of takeaways from this story and probably the most important one is …

6. Exercise the power of choice

As humans, this is the greatest power we have. In the real life story I just shared, Subbamma could have wallowed in her fate and become bitter and dried up. Or she could have chosen to take her life.Instead she chose to become a victor.

I once summoned enough courage to ask her about her past and how did she garner the strength to face the tragedies of the past. With her warmest and kindest smile, she softly replied, ‘I was broken at the time both with what happened and the cruel words of some people, but I decided to smile and remain positive come what may and take one day at a time. I would never think about the future and try to find my happiness in seeing others happy. I also tried to focus only on the encouraging words of the few versus the harshness of the others. Initially it seemed difficult but over time it became a habit and second nature.’ Here was an uneducated old woman who had walked the talk.

The reason I chose this story is because here was a girl, not educated, at a time and place when things were definitely not easy for a widow, with no access to the kind of motivational material that are available now and still look at the choices she made.

Yes, in every moment we have the power to choose and in that choice our life’s successes and failures are hidden. With each choice we either seal our fate or open the doors to new opportunity and blessings.

So now let us make a start- choose to be mentally unbreakable. May this goal dictate all our actions.

Why does negativity have so much power over us. Because of the frequency and repetition of the thought which becomes a habit. And habits are like our shadows. By following the above-mentioned tips religiously, get kickstarted on the journey to become unbreakable and may that be the new habit and shadow. So, get, set, go.

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    • Miebakagh57 profile image

      Miebakagh Fiberesima 

      5 weeks ago from Port Harcourt, Rivers State, NIGERIA.

      I agreed with Halemane. And this story reminds me to recall the growth stage in every sphere of life. It will remain evergreen.

    • hmkrishna profile image

      Halemane Muralikrishna 

      5 weeks ago from South India

      Some of the points you have mentioned are important and without which we will be nowhere. In order to achieve something big, continuous hard work with a systematic approach is needed. So, I will make it a checklist for my long-term success by doing hard work and maintaining it with recording in a journal. Thanks, Ms Sowrabha for such a useful article.

    • Miebakagh57 profile image

      Miebakagh Fiberesima 

      5 weeks ago from Port Harcourt, Rivers State, NIGERIA.

      I agreed in totos.

    • CaribTales profile image

      Dora Weithers 

      5 weeks ago from The Caribbean

      Thanks for your motivational ideas and suggestions. The story of that woman is a real inspiration on the power of choice. Thank you.

    • Sowrabha Mahesh profile imageAUTHOR

      sowspeaks 

      5 weeks ago from Bengaluru

      Hi Manatita44, your visits always give me joy. No, I am not the rock climber though I do have some plans. And yes, there is no utility reading unless we put it into daily practise. Writing helps me strengthen my practices. Appreciate your comments.

    • Sowrabha Mahesh profile imageAUTHOR

      sowspeaks 

      5 weeks ago from Bengaluru

      Hi Lorna, your visits and comments are always looked forward to and deeply appreciated. I am glad that you liked the story. I chose it over all the popular story of achievers as she was someone i knew first-hand. She was gutsy and bold in a quiet way. She literally demonstrated how to be mentally strong to all who knew her. I am glad that even after her passing away, she silently inspires.

    • Miebakagh57 profile image

      Miebakagh Fiberesima 

      5 weeks ago from Port Harcourt, Rivers State, NIGERIA.

      I agreed completely.

    • Sowrabha Mahesh profile imageAUTHOR

      sowspeaks 

      5 weeks ago from Bengaluru

      Hi Sneha! Delighted that you enjoyed this article. Probably women are modelled on Mother Earth and are naturally endowed with greater mental strength. Thanks for this beautiful comment.

    • Sowrabha Mahesh profile imageAUTHOR

      sowspeaks 

      5 weeks ago from Bengaluru

      Hi Vikram, you are a perfect example for some of the thoughts I have put out in my article. Thank you for the encouraging words.

    • Sowrabha Mahesh profile imageAUTHOR

      sowspeaks 

      5 weeks ago from Bengaluru

      Hi Eric, your visit always gladdens me. I am sure that you do many of these . Thanks for the kind words. Pleased that you enjoyed the story.

    • Sowrabha Mahesh profile imageAUTHOR

      sowspeaks 

      5 weeks ago from Bengaluru

      Hi Mahesh ... happy that you liked the story. I really relate to your comment that the desire to contribute can be a big motivator and there are a great number of people - nameless and faceless who are selflessly serving society.

    • Sowrabha Mahesh profile imageAUTHOR

      sowspeaks 

      5 weeks ago from Bengaluru

      Thank you Dr. Pran for stopping by. Hope you found some take-away.

    • Dr Pran Rangan profile image

      Dr Pran Rangan 

      5 weeks ago from Kanpur (UP), India

      An insightful article. Thanks Sowrabha for sharing it.

    • profile image

      Mahesh Chandra Gaur 

      5 weeks ago

      Hi Sowrabha, this is an inspirational article with a perfect real-life example of a lady who selflessly served the society in a way she could. Having a goal and a desire to contribute to the society keeps one motivated.

    • Ericdierker profile image

      Eric Dierker 

      5 weeks ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      These are very good notions laid out quite well. In some fashion I do all of them. My successes are different than most but these still hold true. I like stories within stories like here.

    • Sneha Bhat profile image

      Sneha Bhat 

      5 weeks ago from India

      You are back with your extraordinary article as always madam.. Enjoyed reading your article. Yes, women is a symbol of sacrifice, strong, goal oriented, and able to take all the responsibilities. A very brief article that inspire everyone to achieve something in life.

    • talesofvikram profile image

      Vikram Brahma 

      5 weeks ago from Assam, India

      Hi my friend, this is a beautiful article. People with goals and faith can do wonders. I like the way you presented your article. Mental strength is the first essential ingredient that gives us strength. Thank you for sharing.

    • Lorna Lamon profile image

      Lorna Lamon 

      5 weeks ago

      I feel mental strength gives us the courage to pick ourselves up and keep on going. The story of Subbamma is touching - full of courage and strength. It's having the mindset to overcome life's obstacles and the will power to achieve. This is an excellent article Sowspeaks with great advice and valid points. Thank you for sharing.

    • vidsagster profile image

      VIDYA D SAGAR 

      5 weeks ago

      A very inspiring article sowpeaks. The story is beautiful and touching. Mental strength is crucial during these uncertain times and you have given good tips to develop them.

    • manatita44 profile image

      manatita44 

      5 weeks ago from london

      You're not the rock-climber, are you? What a beautiful story! What a beautiful Trail. So hurry. On-your-marks ... set ... go!

    • Miebakagh57 profile image

      Miebakagh Fiberesima 

      5 weeks ago from Port Harcourt, Rivers State, NIGERIA.

      Sowpea, I like this article for it is educating. Many who were found wanting in the uncertain thought process will found healing in it. Thanks.

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