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Brain Farts

Updated on September 18, 2012

That's what my daughter calls them. Those moments when you do or say something which calls into question your mental state. She also refers to them as "senior moments" which as a boomer, I resent. Please note that in no way are my comments intended to make light of those who are challenged with a serious mental illness but its important to see the humour in everyday life. No matter how these little events are labeled, they are real, they are often funny, and they are sometimes quite humiliating.

Now I won't discuss any humiliating moments because, of course, I've not experienced any. The funny ones however are admittedly fairly frequent and I believe due to distraction, not from losing my mind. For example, yesterday I noticed my Blackberry sitting on the desk so I picked it up, and placed it in my pocket. Later when returning to my home office, I again saw my Blackberry sitting on the desk. "What the ????", I thought. I guess I just imagined I had put it in my pocket. So once again I picked up my Blackberry and as I attempted to put it in my pocket I felt something blocking the way. I reached in and pulled out the wireless mouse from my laptop. Now you could make an argument that this was a brain fart but I like to think that my mind is so intensely involved with important matters that I was simply distracted. Could happen to anyone.

Another time, we couldn't find the remote control for the little tv in the kitchen. I can't begin to tell you how long we searched. In fact we searched so long I decided to take a break and have a snack. When I opened the refrigerator, guess was what sitting in the cheese compartment? My wife and I still disagree as to who put the remote in the refrigerator but I'm convinced that no real man, especially me, would ever exchange his remote for cheese. He might, however, occasionally, answer the remote when the phone rings but doesn't everybody?

We have a small swimming pool which gets overworked during the summer. My wife and I literally live in the pool. A couple of years ago, we bought a Uniden waterproof cordless phone to use around the water. Whenever I went out to the pool I would pocket the Uniden and usually, but not always, place it on the little brick ledge which separates the spa from the pool. On this particular day I kept it in my pocket as I jumped in. Needless to say, this was the first test of the phone under actual water conditions. A while later when I faintly heard a phone ring I knew it was working okay. As I pulled it from my swimsuit pocket to answer I realized the faint ringing I heard was not a water-muffled Uniden but the sound of the phone in the house. "Just great, I said to myself. Some waterproof phone. Its broken, what a waste of money!" As it turned out, the Uniden was actually just fine however my new Blackberry which I had in my pocket instead was not.

I have always been able to laugh at myself but as I get older it feels more and more like a comedy club. Senior moments may be reserved for those of us who have crossed that line but brain farts can happen to anyone. Got brain gas?

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