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Calm Your Anger With These Simple Tricks

Updated on April 16, 2012

The World We Live In

Americans are angry. Traffic jams, soaring gas prices and a crappy economy are just a few of the things that get our blood boiling. Calling customer service these days is a nightmare. Remember the good ol' days when you would call a company and a person would pick up the phone? Now you have to dial up all the prompts yourself, sit on hold just to talk to someone in a foreign country who can't understand you.

Once a Democrat and Republican could sit at a table and have a healthy discussion. Today the rhetoric from politicians is hateful, used to press buttons and turn people against one another. The internet has also been used by bullies as a means to torment others. Internet trolls spend their days online intentionally upsetting people. All this including the personal problems you may have, it's no wonder so many of us our medicated.

Anger is a normal emotion that happens to us when we are in danger. It's our natural fight / flight response. Anger can be healthy when we use it to be productive. However, many times the anger in us builds up and we don't really know why we are angry. There are some techniques you can use that can help you calm down, sort your emotions out and find out what is really bothering you.

When You Are Already Angry

Breathe deeply. Take a few deep breaths. Slowly inhale and exhale. You will feel your body and mind relax.

Count backwards from ten. Slowly count backwards from ten to one. Once you get to one, you will feel calmer.

Look Up. I don't know why, but this works. Usually when you are angry, you are looking down. Looking up distracts you and helps you gain your composure.

Walk Away. Remove yourself from the place you are in. Just a change of scenery will clear our heads and help us forget what was getting us so fumed.

Write your feelings down. Get the anger out by using a pen and paper. It is a great release and more effective than throwing something or punching someone. Less dangerous too.


If you are prone to outbursts of anger, there is always an underlying reason. Are you really that angry at your friend who wasn't paying attention to you when you were expressing your feelings? Maybe the fact that your friend was ignoring you reminds you of something else. Perhaps you feel like nobody pays much attention to you or takes you seriously. Journaling can help you find out what's the cause of your anger. Once you know what is really bothering you, you can work on fixing that problem in your life.

Meditation is not just for Buddhists and people into New Age. Meditation has been used for thousands of years to calm the mind. Try sitting in a quiet room and relax. You only need about five to ten minutes a day.

Take a walk every day. Even if its just a quick ten or fifteen minute walk. Absorb the world around you, the trees, the birds and the people who walk by. After a nice walk you will feel light and your spirits lifted.


Anger can make us feel strong and powerful. That feeling is an illusion. When angry you are actually powerless because your anger has taken over. Constant anger will do nothing but make us sick. I hope these tips can help you come to terms with what is bothering you. Life is short and best spent happy and worry-free.


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    • profile image


      5 years ago

      I was wondering why is it when I'm angry my eye color chafes to a glowing red?

    • amymarie_5 profile imageAUTHOR

      Amy DeMarco 

      6 years ago from Chicago

      Thanks! I'm glad you liked this! Hope it helps!!! Take care!

    • pringoooals profile image


      6 years ago from Edinburgh

      I like you advice, Amy, together with the reason why we get angry;)

    • blaise25 profile image

      Fehl Dungo 

      6 years ago from close to you...

      Excellent hub. It's always best to calm down and breathe before ruining anything. You have given some important tips.

    • radhikasree profile image

      Radhika Sreekanth 

      6 years ago from Mumbai,India

      These are some important tips to calm down anger that burst out when everything goes wrong. Some great points here.

      Up and useful.

    • swb78 profile image

      Scott Biddulph 

      6 years ago from Gainesville Georgia

      Very good Hub--great advice!

    • profile image


      6 years ago

      Anger can make us feel strong and powerful. That feeling is an illusion. When angry you are actually powerless because your anger has taken over.- what a revelation.

      nice hub. I actually do write my anger it really helps me to control it.

    • amymarie_5 profile imageAUTHOR

      Amy DeMarco 

      6 years ago from Chicago

      Thanks Ttombs08. Glad you learned how to control your anger over the years. It takes practice but these tips have always worked for me. Take care!

    • TToombs08 profile image

      Terrye Toombs 

      6 years ago from Somewhere between Heaven and Hell without a road map.

      Wonderful hub! When I was younger, I was a bit of a hot head...I use a lot of your helpful hints to keep from ripping most people's heads off. But sometimes they just need it. :) Very sound advice and excellently written. Voting up and all. :)

    • amymarie_5 profile imageAUTHOR

      Amy DeMarco 

      6 years ago from Chicago

      Hi Suburban Poet,

      Ha, I guess I'm older than I look. I'm 36 and I remember getting actual human beings on the phone at the second ring back then. I guess it wasn't that long ago, just seems that way. I used to get sucked into all those forums too and I don't go on them anymore. I'm calmer because of it! Thanks for commenting!

      Hi Algarview,

      Glad you can use this! I have a short temper. It's taken me a lot of practice but I can usually control it now. Writing helps. You'll see how much better you'll feel after journaling your feelings! Thanks for writing!

      Hi Injured Lamb,

      I'm a bit of an angry bird myself. I am still trying to understand where my anger is stemming from. These tips are so simple and they really work. Best to you, and thanks for stopping by!

      Hi Fpherj48,

      Deep breathing is so underrated! I used deep breathing to help me quit smoking years ago and now I use it to battle stress and anger. Don't know why but it is so calming! Thanks for stopping by and for rating up! I appreciate it. Take care!

    • fpherj48 profile image


      6 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

      amymarie....A lot of sound, practical advice here....thank you! I am always open to healthy, natural means to "calming" one's self...not necessarily due to "anger," but there are a whole list of various emotions we deal with daily. Your suggestions would be helpful for most of them! Deep breathing is truly does create a relaxation. Up +++

    • Injured lamb profile image

      Injured lamb 

      6 years ago

      A great advice for calming down our anger, frankly, I am just like an angry bird recently...I know I just don't appreciate the popularity of angry bird, and that's why your simple great tips help...thanks for the sharing Amy, have a nice day there!

    • algarveview profile image

      Joana e Bruno 

      6 years ago from Algarve, Portugal

      Hello, Amy, good one, I need to remember some of your advices. These days I find myself getting angry a lot. Liked that advice of writing down your feelings. Last week I bought a notepad to do just that, I guess we're on the same page. Voted up.

    • The Suburban Poet profile image

      Mark Lecuona 

      6 years ago from Austin, Texas

      Hi Amy... "the good old days?" You look way too young to remember any good old days! Ha..... I'm 53 and I think you are right. Things have gotten worse and the internet is probably one of the main culprits. People can anonymously be anyone they want. The advent of the troll is one of the worst things we've encountered on a daily basis. There are no rules of engagement anymore. I left a political chat room that I frequented for years because it was making me angry. I would write things then regret them later. Everyone was acting the same way too so I just finally said forget it (noboby changes their views anyway).

      These are good tips and I think it's a useful hub if for nothing more than to remind us to step back and breath....


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