Certainty in Life: Goals and a Sense of Direction

Have you noticed that people who discover what they truly want seem to have richer and fuller lives? Those who have given things up, and abide with strict discipline to their steps on the path to achieving their aims are happier.

They are confident and find hidden energies within themselves to achieve what they want, they gain more control over their life and definitely react less like ‘victims’ of life.

Life is full of dreams, promises and possibilities, but guarantees of knowing how everything will pan out seldom exist. (The only certainties in life are taxes and death!)

“Uncertainty and mystery are energies of life. Don’t let them scare you unduly, for they keep boredom at bay and spark creativity.” R I Fitzhenry

We are never sure how anything will play out, and by trying to force a guarantee that the aim you have chosen and the path you will take to your destination is the best one, and that sudden twists and turns won’t greet you on the way, will make the possibility of facing disappointment a reality.

No one would like to get into a car and not know where they’re going, or if you know the destination, you’d want the map to show you the route. Discovering your true goals will put you behind the wheel, you are no longer a passenger, you choose the route, make the decisions, adjust the plans, and keep to the timetable.

Now you begin to see the cause in the quality of day-to-day life. It is no longer the result or effect of an outside force. It has direction and purpose.

Discovering your own personal goals, that sit right with you, both in your mind and in your heart, will open a wide range of positive experiences. But you have to be sure that your goal reflects what you truly want and that you are aware of the changes reaching that goal will make in your life.

Your goals must be very clearly defined and visualized. You need to emotionally connect to your goals, if they do not have emotional meaning for you the goal will never grow or develop.

Without the assuredness and drive you get from knowing unequivocally that you are on the right path, you may not have the drive to carry you through the challenging times. It takes determination to do whatever it takes, for however long it takes to achieve your desires.

We are all here to learn, and we learn because of uncertainty. We go forward despite the unknown and as we meet different things and different people along the way, we learn to grow and transcend what previously may have been regarded as impossible, or learn a new way of achieving your target or successfully breaking through the obstacles.

“To teach how to live without certainty and yet without being paralysed by hesitation is perhaps the chief thing that philosophy, in our age, can do for those who study it.”

Betrand Russell

Emotions give motivation and meaning to life, and without emotion, you will never become passionate about anything.Nothing really matters if you feel don’t feel anything the action becomes pointless.What you want must be something you feel, and the more emotions attached to it the faster your brain will respond.Emotions attached to your vision put you in a strong position to reach your destination.

Opening up to new Experiences

Instead of compulsively wondering about the outcome, before being able to take a step, wouldn’t it be better to let go of this need and preserve that energy for something more useful to you.

Being open is an attitude which allows you to keep your sense of expectancy of the unknown alive, but still grounds you in reality, and could provide ways of getting what you want in new ways and offer rewards that you never dreamed possible.

Being mindful of your inner and outer focus, in that inner-directed focus lets you look at creative ways to take the necessary steps; while outer focus allows observation of the impact you have and time to take cognisance of other options of perhaps a more effective method of achieving your goals.

Single-minded focus on one goal is limiting and one-dimensional and possibly will exclude you from enjoying the special rewards life so abundantly offers when it is approached in a balanced way.

I am not talking here of leaving things up to chance, it's about balance and being open but also being willing to act decisively.

Doubt and fear are both future directed emotions that lock you into inaction. “What will happen if I fail, or this doesn’t work?” Avoidance feeds the original doubt and fear, which just keeps growing and growing.

To be more comfortable with uncertainty, cognitive restructuring says the idea is to not accept blindly the automatic negative thoughts that come so easily and develop the skill of re-phrasing and challenging those thoughts. So when doubt raises its head say to yourself something like, “Uncertainty is less than ideal, but I can accept and tolerate it.”

Remember your present is where your power exists and none of us holds the future in our hands. What is happening now, the present moment is where you can act decisively and a small step forward is better than no step at all.

The biggest obstacle on your path is not ‘not knowing,' it is the inaction of not taking that first step, and then the next and the next.

The Faith Factor

If your subconscious believes something, it will work in many ways to confirm the belief in physical terms, and come up with ideas for implementing your belief.

So, it’s not about having certainty and assurances, it is the faith factor – the faith that in the overall scheme you are taking the route that is right for you.

The belief that you will learn what you need to know along the way, you will be able to negotiate the details or obstacles and find the right answers at the right time for you.