ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Committing Robbery

Updated on July 8, 2012

"BE WARNED, I WILL RETURN"

Fear, Worry, Stress, and Worthlessness is the company he keeps. Will I be ready for him?
Fear, Worry, Stress, and Worthlessness is the company he keeps. Will I be ready for him? | Source

PERSONAL DEMONS

The demon has come back and he is trying to take over my life again. All throughout my life I've dealt with this struggle. I've been to therapy and on medication. I've trusted in God to take care of whatever is missing. To no avail, this devil seems to creep back in.

My soul is in danger at all times. I try to confess to release my sins. I am dying inside and no one understands. There is no one who can really help me.There are a few who can assist with the pain but only momentarily. In those few moments I feel strong, confident, worth while and beautiful. He will be back, I know he will. When he returns I need to be ready.

I take my tme and use it wisely. I tell myself that I am somebody, and I make great strides. My world is good and my spirit sings. I am confident again, I am a queen, strong minded and strong hearted. Enjoy the time because Yes, he is going to return. I don't think about him coming back, so I ain't scared. I convince myself by chanting out loud "deal with him when the time comes, for now stay focused and stay happy.

He is a constant threat to my well-being. Stealing my happiness, my joy, my time, my friends. Now he is trying to steal my confidence, my life, and my soul. He tells me I can't when I know I can. Sometimes he makes me cry so hard that my chest screams with pain. Robbery is his game and he takes much pleasure in it. I can't resist him. He is too strong.

Is this truly a mental issue. With each return he gets stronger and stronger. He is opposite of everything I stand for. I am a child of God, daughter, wife, mother, writer, teacher, nurse, lover, and supporter. When he arrives he tells me that everything about me is ugly, dirty, sinful, stupid. He reminds me of all the disgusting things that I have ever done. Doesn't he know that there are people who love me, people who depend on me to be there for them? I believe he knows and he's counting on that. This derelict is trying not only take me but also all those who depend on me. I must be strong, I have no choice.

So the rumble is on and the next time he shows up. I will be ready. He can no longer deceive me into thinking he is my friend and he'll keep me safe. I know him too well now. I"ve already heard his entire strategy so it won't work this time. See, his last few visits he's made some mistakes. He has a habit of not allowing me to sleep. He whispers in my ear, "who do you think you are? Remember, your nobody. How many times did ya daddy tell you that you are nothin' and you won't ever be nothin'." He thinks that depriving me of sleep will keep me weak. I now know his plan. He can't fool me anymore.

I am prepared to take him out. The deceiver, menace, thief, my demon, my devil. So beware, because you can no longer treat me like crap. You can no longer keep me chained down with fear. I am not afraid of you anymore and I will fight back. I will fight you with all my mind, with all my heart and with all my soul and I will win. I can now call you out by your real name.

"DEPRESSION"



PLEASE GET HELP!!

Depression is a mental health illness. There is help out there. If you suffer from symptoms of depession you can get some help.
Depression is a mental health illness. There is help out there. If you suffer from symptoms of depession you can get some help. | Source

Depression Help Websites

Depression is a feeling of being extremely unhappy. A medical condition in which a person is so unhappy that they cannot live a normal life.

There are many online sites where you can get help with depression. I have listed a few sites that are very helpful.

www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov

www.webmd.com

http://helpguide.org/topics/depression.htm

working

This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://corp.maven.io/privacy-policy

Show Details
Necessary
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Features
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Marketing
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Statistics
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)