How to deal with illness when a loved one is sick? :Coping

By: Anastasia Vaughan

The biggest problem that you’ll ever encounter when coping with sudden illness is when you are forced to watch someone you love suddenly become sick in a way that you did not see coming. Perhaps the reason why a great deal of people fall into depression or have several negative side effects is the mere fact that the average person often rationalizes that illness can’t happen to them or the ones they love. Perhaps I am wrong and you always feared that illness was a tragedy that can happen to you and your loved ones. At the end of each day the one thing the people who are not sick but have to suffer through the illness of others tend to share common feelings of grief and despair. Life has been known to throw people quite a few curve balls if only to test the idea of seeing you on your toes. Don’t feel bad about the path the life is taking you down because in reality you are not the only one walking down the very same direction.

Although it may sound selfish to some to bring up even when the main focus of the illness that needs to weathered is on the victim it can be sometimes even harder for the people to sit on the sidelines and not be able to really help the one they love come out of pain when their seems that there is no pain medication or doctor who can stop the symptoms hospital staff tells the loved ones of their patients that some sickness just have to run their course. Fighting sickness of any kind can be very hard which means that as the support system of a loved one who is sick the burden of having to be strong enough to endure for the both of you will fall on the person who is well. Giving the patient a great deal of support can do wonders for helping someone find the strength to get better.

While coping with a loved one’s illness you go through many different stages. For example some people go through a loss of identity, a breakdown in communication, denial, and the unrealistic view that people get better in every situation overnight. While helping the ones you love cope through their pain you must be willing live up to the role of protector, loved one, compassionate friend, and that of the strong-minded person who keeps everything going. Once a person has not passed on there is always hope as the medical field and technology is always changing for the better. Despite being a sick person one must remember it is only human nature to want to be treated like a person first and for most even when the hospital setting can take away a patients dignity. Not every patient wished to be smothered by loved one’s and it is important that you understand that their feelings are valid and not necessarily trying to offend you.

When you are dealing with a long term illness know your facts and alternative things you can do to increase the likelihood of the patient getting better. Sometimes it is not that doctor doesn’t want to inform you everything that you can do to aid the healing process but perhaps it is that there aren’t enough hours in the day for some doctors to sit down and meet with the patients the way that they should. The internet is a friend but books are still your best friend. Have a list of questions ready based on the outside knowledge you have attained so that when a nurse or doctor if available can further investigate if your information is valid. Make sure the patient takes all of the medication prescribed and know the side effects that are on the label, follow the appropriate diet for the situation, if exercise is recommended take the first step and exercise based on the doctor’s orders with the patient. Not all illness have to go directly into the end stages your job is to in fact find out how to hold the illness off for as long as possible if it is one in which can be scaled back. Try to be as pleasant as you possibly can. Your loved one can always use a dose of positive energy even if they are always the one who gives you positive energy. If you can, always remember to check out physician’s certifications and licensing information that maybe posted on the walls of his/hers office as much as you can. In many states some physicians are not required to have medical malpractice insurance ask questions and never be ashamed of the information you are trying to get to know but still do not yet know. And last but not least be optimistic it is a drug that everyone should take. You will not regret having had hope for that is what often helps you get through the day.