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Death do us part - Ready for that Day

Updated on March 31, 2012

Death do us part - I am ready

I took this vow twenty years ago, not fully realising what it actually meant. I knew that until I died I would be faithful to my husband, but the understanding was only at the surface level. I learned the meaning of this vow as life took strange turns and twists. Sickness, kids, life itself all took its toll on me... and though it is negative in someways it did have its positive effects. I knew what it is to love, especially when I became a mother, life took on a whole new meaning. It was AMAZING! Love is Amazing!
This hub is not about my life, but it is in someways related to it, because it is about death. Last week I had the silliest of all urges to write about what would I like to do before I died. This is not like a bucket list of how I would like to climb the Everest or to go to some exotic destination. It is about the things that matter so much to me. I still do not know why I have to write it here.... but the urge is strong, I would like to heed that inner voice. Hey, no, don’t mistake me.. I am hale and hearty and not contemplating on taking my life, far from it, I want to make each moment of my day count. I live each day with gusto and passion and would like to embrace death in the same way.


Priorities in life

I had listed all the things I would want to do.. last week, but put it off hoping that the urge would go away. For some inexplicable reason it stays on, who know the ways of God!

So here I go...
I would want my family and friends to know that I love them. Each one is so special to me. Somehow I feel that each person was chosen and brought into my life for a purpose and I am grateful for having had the privilege of spending some part of my life with them.

I would want to spend all the time I have with them, especially with my darling spouse, my soul mate, and my best friend. I could not have wished for more in this life. He is indeed the better part of my life and the very reason for my happy existence. A gentle human being, faithful, loving and kind. I really am blessed by you! (You know that, don’t you?)
I would like to share with them all I have learned in this life and where I have failed..but leave it to them to derive their own lessons.
I would be happy to give them all I have, in terms of material, love or whatever is left of me.

Being forgiven is as important to me as to forgive. Asking to be forgiven for any harm or hurt I caused them would be very important to me. Especially to my children, I may have been harsh in my enforcement of discipline, I could have been a little more gentler.

Spending time with God is something I do everyday, but if I was going to meet Him I better put on my best robes in terms of cleansing of my soul. I would ask for his forgiveness though I believe he has put my sins away as far as the East is from the West the day I accepted him and started a new life.

sofspics - All pics belong to sofs
sofspics - All pics belong to sofs | Source

I would like to make each day I live the most memorable day and the happiest day of my life, doing what I love to do.
Having done all this, I would like to establish my peace with all things, settle my accounts (not that I have too much to) and tell my dear ones about every thing they need to know about me. Only so that they do not have to treasure hunt in their time of grief. I would probably prepare a list of the things I have or done and how to find them.
I would spend each moment doing things that are well thought out, prioritise my time in such activities that would not seem like a huge waste of time.
I would not like to waste a minute thinking of anything negative, of past regrets and pain. Instead I would do all the good I can. Keep focusing on the positive and that alone.
I would make very minute count and work against time to make my life richer and get as much out of it.
I would love to sort out any issues that I might have had with people and without hesitation try to make peace with everyone, whether they like it or not.
I would take pleasure in arranging my funeral myself. Maybe indulge myself for one last time (I don’t do that so much in real life) I would order flowers and ensure that my coffin is decorated with pink and white flowers, I would like to leave in style..they way I lived, making the best of everything. I would like to avoid any trouble for others so I would take care of all the important stuff myself.
I would make requests to my family and friends that they don’t cry for me as I am happy and that I leave in peace.
I would leave a letter or a special gift to those I love just as a keepsake.. telling them they could throw it away if it didn't fit in..
But most of all I would share my secrets of happiness with them as I see so many unhappy people around.
I would like to have one last wish, hold my husband’s hand and smile as I leave. I smile so much everyday and would like to leave that way.
I would like to be mad, crazy, funny mad as I am everyday. That would be me, the true me to the very end.
I might break down, not because of the fact I am leaving but because of the fact that I will miss being with my family and friends so much. I might try hard to hold back my tears, but I know I would laugh one moment and cry the next, alternating until I am gone finally to rest forever more.
And Ah Hubpages .. I would ask my friends to write about me without mentioning my name of course... .lol :) I was just being naughty as I always am... :)

I guess I will be happy in death as in life! :):):):)

You are not forced to comment.... feel free...

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    • sofs profile image

      sofs 6 years ago

      LOL you are a treat Ruby! I would have responded the same way... Soulmates indeed .. living half way across the globe.. and yet seem to think and talk in the same language.. It is so much fun to think and connect so well:) Thanks for coming back and saying this(((((hugs)))))) soulmate, Take good care of yourself! Enjoy your day! Sophie :)

    • always exploring profile image

      Ruby Jean Richert 6 years ago from Southern Illinois

      Sofie, I came back to express my thankfulness to your kind words. ie..Soulmates..I believe we all are connected all over the world. I also wanted to say that i am happy. Making my funeral arrangements was not done in sadness, but just looking ahead. I want to add a FUNNY. When i was leaving the mortician's office, He said, " See you Ruby " I turned and said, " Not for a long long time " HaHa..Cheers my friend.

    • sofs profile image

      sofs 6 years ago

      Thelyricwriter, I was wondering if this would get flagged as personal, but the fact that people relate to it is making it worth the writing... I wish more people understood this truth my friend that we have just one shot at life and that we need to live it in style and grace.. with more grace shown toward our fellow humans in this walk of life. Thank you for your kind words. Be a blessing!

    • thelyricwriter profile image

      Richard Ricky Hale 6 years ago from West Virginia

      Up, useful, and beautiful. You provide great tips for life in this article. We can all relate to this and you show it can be done. We only get one shot in life, make every second count. Beautiful words sofs.

    • sofs profile image

      sofs 6 years ago

      Dear Lesley, (if I may call you so)... I am so glad that I did write this here... though I do fear it would cause pain to my darling husband... I am just reminded of that scripture 'death where is your sting?' Oh death has no hold over us who love and believe.. What a beautiful way to live. Thanks for the comment and the vote! Have a wonderful day. God Bless!

    • Movie Master profile image

      Movie Master 6 years ago from United Kingdom

      Hi sofs, I also try and live my life by the saying 'Live every day as though it was your last' your list is quite beautiful as is your writing. Thank you for sharing your thoughts, voting up/awesome, best wishes Lesley

    • sofs profile image

      sofs 6 years ago

      Teaches, thank you for that heart felt wish...It is a blessing to have all you want... and most importantly love... I hope and wish that you my dear accomplish all that you dream of before the end comes... Have a blessed day. Take care! I appreciate your comment very much!

    • teaches12345 profile image

      Dianna Mendez 6 years ago

      Wonderful thought provoking hub article. I have thought about what I would love to accomplish before death. I love that saying, "Live every day as though it was your last" and upon reflection, I try to make each day count. I too have a wonderful friend in my husband and great family. I try to express my love to them often. I smiled through your list and hope that every one of them comes true for you.

    • sofs profile image

      sofs 6 years ago

      Dearest Ruby, I am so glad that you have done all that I want to! it is wonderful to see someone reflecting your thoughts... and I am glad that this hub gives you a feeling of serenity...Hey, you know what maybe we are souls connected in someway...I am happy that I wrote this although I don't want my husband to read this just yet... Sigh!

      Maybe it will make him sad... Thank you sweet lady for your kind words.. it is always good to have you around. Have a blessed day. ((((hugs)))))

    • always exploring profile image

      Ruby Jean Richert 6 years ago from Southern Illinois

      Your writing gives me a feeling of serenity. I have done all that you propose. I selected my casket and my clothing is at the funeral home. I chose my headstone and the wording. It is all paid for. I did this ten years ago when my beloved Sister Bea passed away. I was her executor and the arrangements were left up to me. It was very difficult becaure the grief was terrible. I vowed to take care of mine, relieving my Son of having to go through the process while grieving. I feel the same as you. I am ready to go meet God. The only sadness i feel, is missing my family, but that is a short span and they will be with me in heaven. Thank you Sofie for sharing your thoughts..

    • sofs profile image

      sofs 6 years ago

      Radhikashree, I am bowled over by your comment. I am truly blessed with a wonderful husband, kids and friends. I am humbled that you even connect me with Hubpages.. I do answer the Need help ask forum a lot.. the main place I connect with this community here. I do it mainly because I have faced many difficulties initially and so I like to help out in small ways. I do thank you for your heart warming comment. God Bless!

    • radhikasree profile image

      Radhika Sreekanth 6 years ago from Mumbai,India

      You're so lucky that you could keep up your vows in your life. You're fortunate enough to spend most part of your life to others and see the smile in their faces. God selects very few people to do service and to have a happy married life till death.

      Your rose flower profile image is what comes to my mind when I think of Hubpages. Whenever I've asked something in the forums, it was you who genuinely replied me without any hesitancy.

      I liked this hub as it is a mirror of your heart. Voted up as beautiful.

    • sofs profile image

      sofs 6 years ago

      Alur, I am so sorry to hear that. Your honestly is indeed to be appreciated.

      It is a pleasure to write what you feel and I am glad that you write for release.

      This hub was written on a whim.. or plan, I am not sure but I am ready for anything. Thanks for the comment, I appreciate that. Hope to read your hubs soon. God bless! Have a wonderful day!

    • ALUR profile image

      ALUR 6 years ago from USA

      Wonderful expose. I don't fear death as much as I do the life I'm living with the mundane rituals required. I used to curse my inner voice, but like you I now write for release and I"m learning to thank the multiple blessings.

      My own marriage did not last when I fell ill, and the test of life's bumps challenged the core as I wandered from the marriage looking outside rather than inside. Our vows were surface in the face of trauma.

      You're welcome to visit my hubs as well.


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