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Six Tips for Wives With Hot Flashes Whose Husbands Have Cold Feet

Updated on March 13, 2020
Cheryl E Preston profile image

Cheryl is a proud Baby Boomer who enjoys writing articles that help older adults relive fond memories.

Wife massaging spouse as they walk
Wife massaging spouse as they walk | Source

When spouses become polar opposites

One of the symptoms that most menopausal women find they have in common is hot flashes. This happens when your body begins to heat up as if someone turned up the furnace. Because this is internal, no one else can feel it, and therein lies the frustration. As many aging women are experiencing the change of life, their husbands may be dealing with something that is completely different. A spouse who has been diagnosed with diabetes, peripheral artery disease, low blood, or other health related illness may find that he is always cold. The bottom line to this is decreased blood circulation and it can wreak havoc on married couples. This leaves spouses on opposite ends of the spectrum.

Cold feet
Cold feet | Source

1. Separate but equal spouses

The first thing that married couples need to do is acknowledge a fact. At this point in life, you are separate but equal. The husband has every right to desire to be warm and comfortable, just as his wife should find ways to turn down that infernal, internal heating system. Living in the same house, and sharing the same bed does not have to be difficult. Recognizing this issue, and addressing it is the beginning to working this out together. Cold feet and hot flashes do not have to ruin your lives.

Happy couple
Happy couple | Source

2. Have a merry heart

Proverbs 17:22 says "A merry heart doeth good like a medicine, but a broken spirit drieth the bones." Medical issues can be quite serious, but having a sense of humor about hot flashes and cold feet can go a long way in preventing or defusing any anxiety couples have with each other. Joke with one another when the wife is going sleeveless in the winter and the husband is wearing layers of clothing in the spring and summer. Accept and embrace this major difference in body temperature and it might not seem so bad.

Walking | Source

3.Walk out mood swings

Women going through the change of life and men with health issues that cause poor circulation can also have mood swings. One way to combat changing emotions is to walk. Go for a stroll with your spouse whenever possible. Not only is walking a great stress buster, but it has another amazing benefit. Research from Northwestern University's Feinberg School of Medicine indicates that walking for 20 minutes for at least 3 times a week can cause new arteries to regenerate and improve circulation.

Couples strolling along with hand in hand or sitting side by side on a park bench are also keeping intimacy flowing between them. This may help to ease tensions when the wife wants to open a window and the husband desires to turn up the heat. The fresh air and sunshine from walking will also increase feel good hormones.

Heat and cold collide
Heat and cold collide | Source

4. Addressing bedroom issues

Make your bed with all the cover your spouse desires, but on your side only pull up the sheet. This way you will remain cool if you have hot flashes during the night. Should you find yourself getting chilly just pull the covers up. If possible, position your bed so that the wife is near the window and the husband's side is closest to your heat source. This way you can crack the window when necessary and he can get full benefit for the heat.

The wife should sleep in light breathable cotton, to prevent excess sweating or get some shut-eye in nothing at all. The husband should wear pajama's and keep booties or warm low cut socks on his feet. He should also keep a bathrobe on when necessary.

Beetroot for circulation
Beetroot for circulation | Source

5. Help from medical science and supplementation

Naturally, if you and your spouse are dealing with these issues you should already be seeing help from a health care provider. Follow their instructions carefully and take any medication you have been prescribed. You may also want to check into natural cures and home remedies. Each person's body is different so there are no one size cures all. Having said that, many women, including myself have received great relief from hot flashes by drinking soy milk. If you have allergies to soy products please don't try this. You may want to talk to your physician and discuss other options for relief.

The husband with the cold feet may want to try adding cayenne pepper or beetroot to his diet Check with your local health food stores for other natural cures and please make sure they do not interfere with any medication you are taking. Whenever possible take walks between 9:30 and 11:00 AM when the sunlight has the most vitamin D. Fresh air, and sunshine are both beneficial for improving mood which can help alleviate stress. Hot flashes often are triggered by anxiety and relaxation may help decrease them.

Couples massage
Couples massage | Source

6. Couples massage

Many menopausal women say hot flashes come upon them when they are worried or filled with anxiety. Massage therapy has been proven to be a great tension tamer but not everyone can afford all professional masseuse. Coupled can, however, massage each other anytime they choose, for free. The wife will really be appreciated when she makes a habit of rubbing her husband's cold feet because that helps blood circulation. She will feel relaxed to have him give her a great rub down after a long day.

These six tips are suggestions for what may work for some couples There are no guarantees but when applied they may be of assistance to wives with hot flashes and husbands with cold feet. If nothing more, than to bring humor to the situation and relieve a little stress over aging issues that can frustrate married couples. Good Luck.

This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and does not substitute for diagnosis, prognosis, treatment, prescription, and/or dietary advice from a licensed health professional. Drugs, supplements, and natural remedies may have dangerous side effects. If pregnant or nursing, consult with a qualified provider on an individual basis. Seek immediate help if you are experiencing a medical emergency.

© 2019 Cheryl E Preston


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