Free Funerals Are Possible (With a Bit of Know-How)

Funeral poverty in the UK continues to deepen despite the efforts of associations and companies. Knowing how to truly go it alone can reduce a funeral bill to almost zero.

As well as breaking hearts, a person’s death often pauperises the ones left behind. In the last three years the number of people stumped by an unaffordable funeral invoice has risen by 50%. If that wasn’t bad enough, the government’s fund for the neediest is not as abundant as it once was. The Funeral Expenses Payment now sees off only one third of the total cost of a basic funeral.

The cost of the average funeral is today twice as much as it was in 2004. Back then, according to a recent report by SunLife, a no-frills send-off cost a family on average £1,920; today, the same modest funeral comes in at a mountainous £4,078. The hike, caused by a raft of uncontrollable factors (according to the industry), puts a simple funeral with no added extras well beyond the grasp of one fifth of the UK’s population.

The Competitions and Marketing Authority began its long-awaited probe of funeral costs in June 2018. Its reason: to determine whether or not the prices of services and the services themselves are advertised clearly enough. Should the CMA suggest that big changes have to be rung of the way the industry sells itself many will say it is about time there was a shakeup.

Have we been misled for years by a profession that prides itself in reputations of trustfulness and honesty? With the exception of a few honest Joes the suspicion is, unfortunately, that we have been, and today I’m sorry for your loss has never sounded so hollow. How could we not think the worst when it was only in the last few years that funeral directors opened their doors, binned their net curtains and published their prices on pretty websites?

And just because there is more openness doesn’t necessarily mean that the customer now enjoys ‘value for money’. Having worked in the funeral industry between 2001 and 2014 I saw at first hand the efforts made to maximise profit, and coerce and urge bereaved families to buy services they didn’t really need. And here is the heart of the matter: regardless of openness, virtually none of what a funeral director sells is needed and still less requires their guidance or input.

If you find yourself up to your neck in unenviable grief and you are worried about affording a funeral, avoid asking your funeral director to help you just to ‘keep things simple’ because you will still end up paying through the nose. After all, they have a vested interest in profiting from anything to do with the funeral. Besides, you won’t get very far: most are both reluctant to discount their costs and unlikely to tell you how to go about things yourself.

As the legal guardian of the person who has died you have the right to do things the way you want to. That being said, if you want to do things your own way you will have to let a funeral director know what your intentions are from the outset. Although you don’t need a firm to carry out the funeral, you will need to call on one to at least collect and keep safe a person’s body until the day of the funeral. Be aware though that for doing this they will raise an invoice.

Even if you arrange a funeral with the help of a funeral director you are not obliged to buy a coffin from their ‘range’. As long as you have the measurements of the deceased (from the funeral director or a mortuary) you can visit any number of decent coffin sellers on the internet such as The Coffin Company or The Coffin and Urn Shop. Simply buy a coffin and ask the company to deliver it to the funeral home.

Crucially there is no law that states that a person must be buried or cremated in a coffin. Some councils and parishes may forbid the practice on grounds of sensibility but a quick phone call to whoever manages burials and cremations will close the case. If it is not to be carried in a coffin, a corpse needs to at least be wrapped in a shroud made of some opaque fabric.

General speaking, funeral flowers from a florist are more expensive than, say, flowers you buy for someone’s birthday. That is because they often require more custom work, especially floral tributes in lettering. But to order flowers in the midst of a funeral arrangement will push up the price even further; large funeral firms especially tend to add at least 10% to the cost of the flowers.

Along with funeral flowers, items of ‘service stationery’ from a funeral director are pricier due to the fact that they too are often marked up. A visit to a good printer or even a couple of hours spent on a home computer can produce good quality service sheets at a snip of the funeral home’s in-house cost.

To have a professional speaker lead a funeral ceremony is for some people a must. But it is no longer the case that a funeral is always led by a minister of religion. Instead, a member of the family of the deceased may step up, or members of the congregation may choose to take it in turns to say a few words.

Owing to their self-employed status independent funeral celebrants are as expensive (sometimes more so) than church ministers. Despite there being various associations parked around the country, funeral celebrants are unregulated. As a result, virtually anyone with an ounce of social skill can become one and the amount of work each puts into a funeral varies greatly. Check with other people who have used a funeral celebrant before you make a choice.

Despite the myth, a body does not need to be embalmed unless there is a good reason for doing so; a long stretch of time until the funeral service with lots of visits by relatives, or an international repatriation, are two such reasons. If there are to be no visits then embalming is completely unnecessary. Keeping a person’s remains in a cool room (preferably refrigerated) is a sufficient measure to prevent decomposition.

Hire a funeral director’s hearse if you want to but you do not have to. You are legally entitled to transfer the body of a relative to a cemetery or crematorium in any suitable vehicle such as an estate car or van. As long as the deceased is not visible to the public you will not contravene any statute. It is a worthwhile route to consider because you could save yourself at least £250 in the process. It is however also worth gauging the thoughts of a local authority or parish office before you decide.

Talking of funeral cars, the limousine question is one frequently put to a ‘client’ by a funeral director. Limousine hire is for most firms a keen money-spinner but a family car is one of the least useful of all funeral provisions. If you are going to make your way to a funeral service under your own steam (which most people do these days) there seems little point in forking out for a limousine.

To not use the funeral director’s cars will raise the added benefit of allowing you to book a funeral that suits your schedule, for most funeral directors will book a funeral concerned only at their own logistical capabilities. That they do this over and above the want of the family often leads to their booking an unsuitable date, too far in advance or too close for comfort for you.

Funeral directors will suggest that they collect charity money on your behalf. To do this they usually place a box at the door of the place of worship into which cash is dropped by members of the congregation after the service. The funeral director will then send the amount collected to your nominated charity or cause. Morally, this provision should be free of charge and in most cases it is, but astonishingly there are some firms that levy a fee for the collection and distribution of charity money.

Should you want to set up a collection at a funeral service you can this yourself. You will not only need a way to collect pledges but you will also need a sign or include an announcement in the service to explain where the money is going. If the funeral is to be held in a Christian church the sacristan will do this for you.

Paperwork is something which we have not touched on but it is enough to say the general belief that it can only be completed by a funeral director is nonsense. Hospital bereavement departments and local authority registrars have ample leaflets to instruct the hesitant on how best to proceed, and almost all of the forms that are needed to allow a cremation to take place can be found on the Ministry of Justice website. True, there are more forms needed for a cremation than a burial but an experienced GP or Coroner’s Officer would be able to help with their completion.

The biggest single cost listed on a funeral invoice is usually labelled ‘Professional Services’. A funeral director will explain the amount as comprising running costs, the cost of ordering relevant paperwork, of bringing a deceased person to the funeral home and of looking after them until the day of the funeral. But with every aspect of the funeral service now accounted for as doable (bar the collection and storage of the deceased) it is tempting to consider that even this cost can be removed from the final bill.

A growing number of groups and businesses in the UK are fighting for fairer pricing of funerals. The Funeral Poverty Pledge urges funeral businesses to be more open about their pricing and it has published a list of funeral directors who have signed up. But good associations such as that only attend to the ideas of pricing structure and value for money, and in the meantime funeral costs continue to soar.

It is certainly worthwhile to consider your preferred course of action before you ask a funeral director to arrange a funeral for you. For years it was assumed hearses, limousines, bearers, forms and coffins came as unmoveable standards but the assumption was wrong. The truth of the matter is that a funeral is not a package deal. Take things into your own hands and eliminate whatever element you wish to make a saving.