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Happy Mother’s Day to NonMoms

Updated on May 9, 2019
Ericdierker profile image

I like to come at things from a different angle. Usually if we take some words and apply them to ourselves we can then apply to the world.

Heard that A Boy Is Like His Dad?

Thanks that he is his Mom's
Thanks that he is his Mom's | Source

No Control, Give it To Them

I have had so many mothers it is hard to keep track of. Some are with me without body now. But believe me they are with me. Perhaps the best is to start with the mom I never knew in the flesh. He is still in my heart and nowadays moves me to more compassion for others. My mom and dad purchased me. How wrong you say that I say that. Heck she was so poor she could not possibly afford to feed two mouths. The second one inside of her. That would be me.

Her doctor, my dad could tell somehow that there was something wrong with me and that I was a boy. He was a well known diagnostician with just his hands. (Later he diagnosed my cancer before the tests did – a little all weird but I guess medical folks have done that since before Christ)

So dad purchased me. Doesn’t that sound funny? Well he gave her a stipend for food and rent. He took care of all bills. Mom says she argued to give her more but she pressured Dad to improperly use his influence to get her a job.

If you do Bible stuff this one is awesome in this regard: 1 Peter 2:24-25 “bore” means to purchase. Purchase can also mean haul in (a rope or cable) or haul up (an anchor) by means of a pulley, lever, etc. It also is used for climbing like, I like; when you are climbing synonym grip; She tried to get a purchase on the slippery rock.

My mom and dad purchased me and my 1’st mom made room for them to do just that. To surrender is often the greatest gift we can give one another. I am all into the Love is God deal as you may know, so to surrender is to let go and let God.

2’nd Mom is just that in my sense. She “seconded” me. God mother. She insisted on me learning music. A beautiful silver plated clarinet. Voice lessons from Ms. Cummings our choir leader. I got in a fight one time to show it did not make me a sissy as I was called for it. She made “Uncle” Karl – husband and my Godfather hire and teach me to grow things from fruit grafts to lawn manicuring. No power tools ever. Honing blades and hand trimmers and on knees weeding. Missy Mangum is what we called her. Mom

You Know Me Mom!

Thanks Mom

Accepting a Son
Accepting a Son | Source

Take Love It Works

Let us just move ahead to another 2’nd mom. To my knowledge she was Nina. I understand she was about 6’2”. A fine black lady. Something again to do with mom and dad doing stuff in a family way. Maybe her husband was killed down at the Saginaw saw mill. Kind of strange by modern standards anyway. So I was adopted. Before “formula”. A wet nurse was needed and more hugs than a child has a right to – I am talking constant like prayer constantly. Or so I am told. Nina I hope I passed it on.

This 2’nd mom has a card in the mail. My youngest big sister out of three. So four years to my one years. She was the second time I was adopted. I can just barely remember her brushing my teeth and dressing me up for the day. I for sure remember before I started kindergarten at four her taking off our snow gloves and holding my hand on the way to school. Totally my nurse (registered – with my stage four cancer) what a danged drill sergeant. Exercises’ in between puking. Her husband Donny was a best friend long before they married. My daughter is named after her. Duh!

Oh my goodness. Have I mentioned Auntie Gail yet? My eldest daughter named after her. Angels bow to her presence in body and now in grateful honor spirit. She was my mom’s sister. Neither had a blood one. They met as nurses serving in world war two. Stateside in an Aircraft facility. Most do not know but almost as many men and women were injured in factories to produce our military equipment than in some battles. 18 to support one soldier. Wow! Mom and Gail also brought “Uncle” Bill and dad together dating and dancing and playing music during the War.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cdaUlxvuW1I

It occurred to me that my eldest sister is also a great 2’nd mom. Can you imagine they stuck me in a huge drawer in her bedroom? A crib before needing a crib. Any sort of issue and she was there before Jack Low jumped over the candlestick. Reading me to sleep. Cuddling and so much loving. And she is my youngest son’s Godmother of course. I think she really talks with Jesus. (I know that is strange) But that is her cool spirituality. She has designed things like totem poles and Krishna designs. A calligrapher of some sought after. A guide for me, and so I write her to thank her.

Just A Mom And Her Son

Do not look at me. Mostly I like to be a mom.
Do not look at me. Mostly I like to be a mom. | Source

Maybe A Rose

Give Me Motherhood!

Mother’s in Law.

I hear tell that son’s do not consider mothers in law mothers. What fools they are. Mine are only in spirit now. I have had two. And a pre-mother-in-law. Maggie and I were best pards. We had a divorce and times were strained. Her daughter, by then my ex-wife had a 3 year tiff. So Maggie and I, we became even closer. She was a great journalist. Political and societal publish weekly down Phoenix way – our capitol. I was a licensed (hihihi) wordsmith. Our bantering left no doubt our love for each other in our common interest.

Grandma Ti. She was a different breed. She had to leave my wife with her second mom. (two) She worked the rice fields and canals. First they hid my wife from the communists. Then mom was off to bring dad enough food through the “wire” while he was in post war concentration camp in So. Viet. They called it re-education. He was a Ranger attached to an American group. She did not speak a lick of English and my viet was poor. (hey French worked a bit) So we just cooked together and held hands. You should have seen her roll her eyes at my salads and barbeque. But Dad insisted. These moms never pass they just come in.

Oh look at me going on and on. I have several more. My first wife that divorced me said she could never love another as me. Is that a good thing or bad? Too much fun. But she got all my eldest through first class colleges and they still revere her. A fantastic and crazy mom.

My wife Hang is ready to “leave me”. We just have not decided where she would go. So the love fest continues as she is a great mom to our son. She says I am the mom and her the dad. So I have insisted on a party for me come this Mother’s day.

Isn’t just hilarious that our group of friends see me as a second mom? I am cool with that. I do not do current pictures. Just a rule of mine. And no I only wear an apron from time to time, usually “Carharts” and such kind of garb in the kitchen. After all I am one tough momma.

Male or female I kind of think that not being too tough and given more love than direction and nourishment of the soul and love makes you a mom. Funny by I do not buy into the “gender” stuff. Yet I am trans mom. Go figure.

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    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      12 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Ruby you will get this as a nurse. My hemorrhage just turned from rock to gel. Doctor says good to go. A nasty fall onto a sharp rock and it took almost a whole week to heal. Grrrr. I started baby sitting at 12. Friends freaked out and referred me. A twelve year old boy babysitting??? Another story about being an honorary Girl Scout. My mom was the best.

    • always exploring profile image

      Ruby Jean Richert 

      12 months ago from Southern Illinois

      Eric, I would have loved having you baby sit for me when I had to work. Mamma Mia! Some of the most loving women were childless, one stole my husband, Lordy that's another story. I adore reading your far-out life style. Love knows no boundaries.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      12 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Linda I like; double double triple double triple triple. A just for fun soft hitting game. Well triple triple on you. How great you can be a kitchen roll model. Not just to yours but to mine.

    • Carb Diva profile image

      Linda Lum 

      12 months ago from Washington State, USA

      Eric, I'm not too young to be a grandma (I have two girls in their 30's) but it's sweet of you to think so. I am an aunt many times over PLUS. 7 nephews and 2 nieces who have given me 15 great nephews and nieces, and they have (thusfar) produced 6 great-great nephews and nieces.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      12 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Linda my son asked me the other day while we were looking up one of your recipes if you were an aunt. I guess so. Too young to be a grandma and to close to me a friend. At the Dierker household beat goes on.

    • Carb Diva profile image

      Linda Lum 

      12 months ago from Washington State, USA

      Eric, as you have explained so very well, you don't have to give birth to be a mother. Love and gratitude to all of those in our lives who have nurtured and cared for us.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      12 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Pamela you are so right. I kinda wish that more men could be more "mothering". It is an infinite joy. While I was writing this it kept popping into my mind how "sexy" it is when women show their masculine side. But I left it out because it seems so weird.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      12 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Manatita -- Flowers!

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      12 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Clive, mom just got home and asked what I had gotten her into. I told just to share some love. Hands on hips and she just look consternation. Fair enough. I am frivolity in love. She will cook the best. We will do a Viet dance for show off.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      12 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Pamela, my son just wanted to get home but, as a mom I had to start organizing our potluck party for our instructors and ethnicity. Wow! from Germany to Hong Kong to So. Cal. hot-dogs, Philippines and back to My Italian. And my Wife's Viet.

      Being a mom is awesome. We hug and jug. I must reserve our spot and get our "what you will bring" done tomorrow. We were dancing in the "Gym" of course kids thought us nuts - good on them.

    • clivewilliams profile image

      Clive Williams 

      12 months ago from Jamaica

      Happy mothers day Eric!

    • Pamela99 profile image

      Pamela Oglesby 

      12 months ago from Sunny Florida

      What a unique life your have had, and so many to love. Mom or dad, I think we all fill both roles at times. I think you are a man full of love that can fill a mother's role from time to time. i pray for your good health my friend.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      12 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Dana I just shoveled. I came into to my mom bemoaning a friend's actions on me. She wiped her baking covered hands and walked me outside. Outback. Then she tossed me a shovel. She said "my dad said to shovel to work things out". I just shoveled. It works, but I reckon God sews. Dana thank you from us who benefit from you. What you give to a child you give to me. Love has no boundaries. Let us keep it that way.

    • manatita44 profile image

      manatita44 

      12 months ago from london

      That sounds like beautiful flowers, no? (Chuckle)

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      12 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Manatita on Tuesday last we did a huge mother's day card and wrote on the bottom. "Oops Mother's day is Sunday" (two by three feet) She will be home early cooking Viet food. Hmm what thanks should we give. Maybe nothing. Sshhh for Sunday. Just clean and thank her for our home.

    • Dana Tate profile image

      Dana Tate 

      12 months ago from LOS ANGELES

      This is beautiful Eric.

      I've never brought a baby into this world but I have certainly counseled, nurtured and helped many children. What your article says to me is. There are many ways a woman can be considered a mother. It takes a village to raise healthy, well-rounded children.

    • manatita44 profile image

      manatita44 

      12 months ago from london

      Funny story. You have lead a rich life with twists and turns plus all those that you have mentioned before. You seem to have some great children, so you should be cool. See what happens on Sunday. Have a family party.

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