How to Maintain Patience; Anger Management.

Patience is a virtue and anger is a negative. Seldom has anger ever done a man well and often patience is praised as what did a man very well. "patience is the the fruit of wisdom" (ed 2014) "Anger may not be the opposite of patience but it is the absence thereof" (ed 2010) "Lack of patience almost always creates anger" (ed 2003) "Everyone loses their patience, it is the wise man who seeks to find it again, immediately" (ed 2013)

There has never been an angry man who was practicing patience. You decide if you have ever seen that phenomenon. Do not mistake someone who is waiting and not acting out right away for someone who is patient.

How about we look at ways to gain patience. Let us look at four different methods to reduce anger and gain patience. The way we do that is to look at four scenarios that create anger or let us practice patience.

Telephone and the corporation

Vehicle traffic and the idiot.

Someone being late in paying us.

Children or those less adept at our goals.

Please try to laugh at yourself here. You get angry in the above situations, admit it! Let us knock these babies out of your aggravation box and get rid of some anger and replace it with some serenity. Come on.

First when it is all calm and cool and collect take the time to sit still and breathe deep and relax. Seriously just sit down in a chair and cool down all the way and think of something really nice and find a sweet place inside you. No need for fancy breathing or mantras. Just sit still with the intention to relax and think of a cool place you like to go,

Second, touch yourself somewhere like on you hand or arm or knee. And when you do that relax and breath deep in and out. Then do it again and again.

Third, just shut your eyes and drop each shoulder down one inch and put your hands together without gripping them. Just concentrate on that and nothing else. Then notice that feeling and do it four more times.

If you do that 4 times a day for 1 minute a piece it will that 12 minutes a day whenever you want to do it in 3 minute intervals.

Just do that on faith, and we will next see how to use it in our four scenarios.

It just happened you need something and need it now but you must get it through the phone. You are aggravated and distressed and need this something something right now. first you have to find the number and that is a pain, then you call and have to press 14 buttons just to get an operator, then you have to hold for 14 minutes just to talk to a representative who speaks with a heavy accent and says "no" because that is what the computer says. Then the wait to speak with a supervisor (understand that a real person in a company). During this wait you are getting mad and angry and losing your patience. No problem. You practice singing your song: you touch yourself and remember, you close your eyes and lower your shoulders, and you simply take the time to sit still and relax and think of your sweet place.

Dang - what? That supervisor comes on and actually interrupts your peace of mind, what a giggle that is and you have just washed away anger and have been patient without even trying. You have been busy doing positive good things for yourself. Oh yes, what were you calling about in the first place? ;-)

Do we have to set this scenario, They: cut you off, are texting and driving too slow, tailgating, swerving, too long at a green light ----...... and the list goes on and on and on. And it pisses you off and you get angry and it cuts you to the very marrow.

Keep driving little sister and smile cuz you got these tools. Touch yourself in that spot that has a memory of relaxation, start singing your song and begin to lower your shoulders and think about that haven you have in your mind. (no closing eyes please ;-)

Now actually say "thank you driver for putting me in my sweet place". Now damn it smile!

So you are owed money and you counted on that money. Then it is promised and still does not arrive. This type of aggravation cause a wick of anger to burn slow and consistent and very strong. This is the blow up type of problem.

But it is the type of problem that allows us to look inward. Because it is not all about us. And yet it is all about us. The lack of money does not cause us the grief, aggravation, loss of patience and anger, we do by how we let it effect us.

We own the power over how we react.

Some might call it escape, that is okay. Go escape in a chair. Lower the shoulders, take some deep breaths and think about your little haven and rub that spot and sing your song. To hell with the world for ten minutes. Take a look at yourself and look at the world differently

You ask someone to hand you the salad tongs and they just lower their jaw and their eyebrows and stare at you. Well how many danged things are called tongs and how many things do you use to get salad? You point at them and then make a clawing motion toward a salad and still just that stupid look.

Frustration and anger are easy at this point but so is compassion for the little feeble mind. Teach them and feel good about yourself and also get your salad. This one you just need to get over and kick your self for being such a hot head. Be patient.

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