ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

How to Tackle a Scary Diagnosis

Updated on June 27, 2018
Kulsum Mehmood profile image

Kulsum Mehmood is an Eye Consultant with 30 plus years of experience. She is single mother and a philanthropist. She is in a full time job.

Scary Diagnosis

Source

How to tackle a scary diagnosis

NEVER SAY DIE

Birth and death are the facts of life. We are all going to die one day. You may die of cancer, or else you may not. But there is no escape from death. Is there any need then to die each day? So long as you are alive, live each day.

Nobody can predict with certainty how long you are going to live. When the doctor says you have three months to live, he means that a large number of patients with a similar disease and symptoms died in three months. But, he cannot certify that you will too. There are quite a few who have survived for years and years after that. You must believe that you can be one of them too.

The scary diagnosis may not only be cancer, or again it might not only be about how long you have to live. It could be other diseases which may lead to change in your life pattern. It could be Parkinson’s disease, diabetes, heart disease, kidney failure, tumors, or mental illnesses. All these can confront you. So, what do you do? Do you become scared? Do you become horrified? Are you allowed to cry?

Whatever the diagnosis – life threatening or life – altering – the person goes through four stages :

The first stage is shock and/or denial. The person says no, it cannot be happening to me. He/she might refuse to accept the diagnosis and will seek a second or third opinion.

The second stage is anger and a feeling of guilt. Why me, the patient asks. Some people may turn away from God, blaming Him for their misfortune. Or, they may have feelings of guilt. God has punished me for my misdeeds, they may think.

The third stage is depression. There is a sense of complete hopelessness. Some of the symptoms are crying inconsolably, refusing to talk, giving up the will to do simple tasks., insomnia or loss of sleep. Suicide, although is not unusual in such cases.

The fourth stage is acceptance. The person accepts the illness and abandons anger and depression. He/she accepts the limitations of the disease and is ready to deal with it. It is only when they arrive at this stage that they find courage to deal properly with the problem and conquer the odds.

However, these stages do not follow one after the other as mentioned above. A person who has accepted the disease today might become angry and depressed tomorrow. All these feelings – anger, denial, guilt, self-pity, insomnia, frustration, despair, depression, are natural human emotions and nothing to feel ashamed about.

The sooner the person finds support from a person or group, the sooner they are able to fight back. The chance to fight for survival, therefore, is support and understanding. Have someone to talk with, who will listen and be a source of strength. This will help the patient immensely on the road to recovery.

One of the major worries that such patients in India face is finance. There are groups who help find necessary resources to meet the expences. And, there are people who have beaten the odds and survived.

Emotional support can come from a friend or relative. The internet can be valuable in your fight for survival. You can get informed about the intricacies of the illness and find various options for treatment on the net. You can also find out support groups for a particular medical condition. Learning all you can about your illness will help you a lot in making choices about your treatment. And, where survival is concerned every little advantage counts.



Prayers give courage and boost inner strength
Prayers give courage and boost inner strength

Fight against a Scary Diagnosis and win .....

Here is a brief view of how to fight against a scary diagnosis and win :

  1. Check your options via a second or third opinion.
  2. Build a support system through family and friends and the caregivers.
  3. Get better informed about your illness.
  4. Confront the illness.
  5. Make your doctor your friend.
  6. Get an interpreter who will come along with you to the doctor and can follow the information about the disease and its treatment and prognosis.
  7. Decide what is best for you.
  8. Shrug off those guilt feelings.
  9. Permit yourself to be human – cry if you must.
  10. Conquer the self-pity.
  11. Learn to help yourself. Do not collapse under the burden of the illness. Maintain your independence to do things for yourself as far as is possible.
  12. Put your house in order – if the chances are dim. Use your time to settle your affairs. These could be family, finance, relationships, anything.
  13. DO NOT GIVE UP. Nothing is final, only death is. So long as you are alive, there is hope. Medical science is making advances and the human body still holds many surprises.
  14. Life is so beautiful and we all live only once. Celebrate your life. Be grateful that you are alive. Enjoy.Take life on a challenge footing. Face the challenges bravely. And above all things have faith in God and His mercy. He gives only as much burden on each soul as much as he can carry.
  15. And PRAY. Prayer has great strength. It makes you strong mentally and psycologically. Prayer and meditation has a calming effect on your mind and soul. Make your peace with God. Leave your future in His hands ..... in His divine protection.


Scary Diagnosis

Source

© 2008 Dr Kulsum Mehmood

Comments

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • Kulsum Mehmood profile imageAUTHOR

      Dr Kulsum Mehmood 

      9 years ago from Nagpur, India

      Hi hot dorkage. Thank you for your comment and I pray to God that you find courage and the diagnosis is very treatable and NOT what you are fearing. This hub was written when my near and dear one was undergoing a scary diagnosis. I myself found courage on reading my hub time and again. May God Bless you.

    • hot dorkage profile image

      hot dorkage 

      9 years ago from Oregon, USA

      Excellent hub and very nicely put. I am hoping right now that I don't have cancer or if I do that they can get it all out in one go. No one has said the "D" word yet but I can surf the internet and interpret statistics as well as anyone. I needed this advice today and I am fighting with every fiber and I intend to win or go down slugging.

    • Kulsum Mehmood profile imageAUTHOR

      Dr Kulsum Mehmood 

      9 years ago from Nagpur, India

      Thank yoy mariesue, thank you Bob

    • Bob Ewing profile image

      Bob Ewing 

      9 years ago from New Brunswick

      Thank you, very helpful hub.

    • marisuewrites profile image

      marisuewrites 

      9 years ago from USA

      very very good advice, we will put these tips to good use. You covered what a person feels very well. And, you're right, sometimes you will re-visit any of the stages more than once and bounce back and forth. I have found that researching the diagnosis, so you can feel more in control, is a good coping tool.

      thank you for helping others!! =))

    • Kulsum Mehmood profile imageAUTHOR

      Dr Kulsum Mehmood 

      9 years ago from Nagpur, India

      Thank you Jerilee

    • Jerilee Wei profile image

      Jerilee Wei 

      9 years ago from United States

      Excellent advice and good hub!

    working

    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

    Show Details
    Necessary
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Features
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Marketing
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Statistics
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)