- Mental Health
...In the Realm of Gods and Monsters...
Yesterday, as the Sun entered Scorpio and will remain in the sign until November 22 when it changes to Sagittarius, I am extra aware of the progress that has been made this year since I am a Scorpio and my birthday always acts as a catalyst to something similar to New Years Eve. Shows like American Horror Story and Sons of Anarchy have been on for the past several years at this time of year and the shift from summer to fall is exciting to look forward to as the realization arises that death is imminent in nature's blanket of red, orange, yellow, rust, brown...what a beautiful mirage it hangs before us.
I began a new blog yesterday: http://phantomqueen358.wordpress.com/ and although I am notoriously bad at keeping one in the past years, I thought the New Moon of October would be a fine place to begin once again exercising my creative writing muscles before NaNoWriMo begins on November 1st. This is where you write 50,000 words in one month towards a novel. My novel, The Forest Labyrinth, desperately needs me to be a NaNoWriMo participant and I am getting everything ready and organized.
I have gotten to the point of respecting my own limitations and am not responsible for anyone else and their personal opinion of what they are or are not capable of in direct comparison to what I know I am capable of. Oh, and let's not forget my love affair with coffee. That's my current vice and I am fine with that. Sugar is still a dancing little demon on the fringes of my consciousness, but I am doing MUCH better with that.
Which leads me to addiction, again. The cigarettes, the sugar, the bread, the salt. All of that shit is part of what I have loved and still love. If I could smoke and knew it would not kill me or cause some horrid disease, I WOULD STILL SMOKE. But, I have learned, that the things that I LOVE the most have the direct ability to KILL ME in some way or another. That does not leave out people or circumstances, either, and leads me right back into my thoughts about tattoos and the opinions of those who do not have or understand the need for them.
Halloween/Samhain is another gateway to the New Year and following right on its dawn is The Day of the Dead. This Day of the Dead (November 1st) marks my 10 year mark of being smoke-free and my last celebratory tattoo will be inked into my chest before the year 2014 ends. I promised myself that when I made it to 10 years, I would stop the milestone tattoos and begin with a new ream of tattoo milestones, most definitely marking the publication of the next book(s).
In my meditation this morning, I found a little fluttering moth near a bright red flame in my mind this morning...and he dances far off until it dies down to a white whispering fire. Only then will he come with his soft dusty wings and remind me of the power of breath and the enchantment of words...and the silence that frames each little one in a puff of smoke that equals time...ticking ticking ticking away...