ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Reflection - Aging and the Journey of Self Discovery

Updated on January 23, 2013
Source

It is healthy to stop occasionally and reflect on your life; where you have come from, where you've been, and, what you've learned along the way.

I am a baby boomer, a child of the 50's and I'm real proud of it. The timing of my birth was perfect for someone like me. By the time I was in my late teens, it was cool to be a rebel and stand up for what you believed. By the time I was in my 30's, I was too attached to material things to be a cool rebel. I played all the games necessary to appear to be comfortably middle class. I was mostly unaware of the games I was playing though. It just seemed like that's what we did to have a job and a house and to take vacations and...to buy things. I filled my house with those things I bought.

I had so much stuff that even my stuff had stuff. Shelves were lined with all the cute little things that dust settles on. For every craft I tried my hand at (and failed at mostly), I purchased enough materials to make a career out of crafting. I would finish a piece of two and the rest of the materials sat stagnant in neat little organized boxes in some area I called "craft material storage". My kitchen cabinets were stuffed with gadgets too. A gadget to zest a lemon or a gadget to Julienne a carrot and even a gadget to warm your buns. Seriously. I had a gadget that you put a little water in and it would steam a hot dog bun just like those fancy hot dog stands. Have I mentioned books? Gee whiz, I never had too many books. But you know, I never read any book more than once. Never did, never could. So what on earth was I thinking?

Well now I'm 50 something. And I don't want all this stuff. I don't want to dust it or move it or pack it up. I just want it gone. The older I get, the more space I need. It no longer makes any sense to me to have to turn sideways to walk through a room. Be gone, stuff!

The Journey of Self Discovery

There's a lot to be said for getting older. My face doesn't lie to me anymore because I'm not wearing 3 pounds of makeup. I don't squeeze into jeans that are too tight just to look 3 pounds thinner. I am built for comfort, not for speed. When I look in the mirror, it is me I see looking back, the real me. There are lines in my face and sometimes the dark circles under my eyes are a bit frightening, but hey, it's me. It's not the pretend me. It's really me.

I've come to terms with who I am now and I'm not afraid to be this woman who won't be a doormat anymore. I have learned to listen to my sixth sense, the one in my gut that tells me when things aren't as they appear to be. I still have a gigantic heart and hate hurting someone else's feelings but I won't compromise anymore. If it's not right for me, I have to say it. To do anything less is to deny who I am and finally, I have discovered my truth.

I don't say I will anymore, when I know I won't. You won't catch me telling you I'd like to when we both know I wouldn't. But, when I tell you I will, you can take it to the bank. My word means more to me than all that "stuff" ever did.

Underneath the wrinkles, the gray hairs (few though they are), and invisible scars, I have found me. And although it took me a while, I know who I am now and no amount of stuff or money or popularity is going to change me. I am me. I am far from perfect but I am oh so much better than I was. The journey has not always been easy but the lessons, oh the lessons I have learned along the way. Reflection is good for the soul.

© 2012 Linda Crist, All rights reserved.

Read more of my hubs here.

The Lessons I've Learned

Comments

Submit a Comment

  • lrc7815 profile imageAUTHOR

    Linda Crist 

    6 years ago from Central Virginia

    You are very kind shruti. Sometimes I think my thoughts need a leash. lol

  • shruti sheshadri profile image

    shruti sheshadri 

    6 years ago from Bangalore, India

    Brilliant! I am not in this stage but I think i perfectly understand. You are a great writer. The thoughts from your heart just flow so freely. Really genuine!

    Voted up :) beautiful :)

  • lrc7815 profile imageAUTHOR

    Linda Crist 

    6 years ago from Central Virginia

    Yep Alastar Packer, I was and YES...I did. Thanks for reading and for the encouragement!

  • Alastar Packer profile image

    Alastar Packer 

    6 years ago from North Carolina

    You were a dyed-in-the-wool materialist but hey, that was the Me Generation wasn't it lol. Good to hear you listen to your sixth sense and have discovered your truth!

  • lrc7815 profile imageAUTHOR

    Linda Crist 

    6 years ago from Central Virginia

    Hi Bill and bravewarrior! lol Can you tell I had a moment of truth today? A further explaination may follow in another hub but I was running on high octane when I wrote today. Yes, it is a good place to be and I proudly share it with both of you.

  • billybuc profile image

    Bill Holland 

    6 years ago from Olympia, WA

    Built for comfort!!! You had me laughing with that line my friend. Isn't it cool to finally reach the point where all the fluff and nonsense no longer matter? You did a great job of speaking my mind in this hub! Not that easy to do but you did it perfectly.

  • bravewarrior profile image

    Shauna L Bowling 

    6 years ago from Central Florida

    I love your story, Irc! I have two mantras. (BTW, I'm 55 and have travelled far to come to terms with ME!) The first is: if it feels good, do it. If it doesn't, don't. And when it stops, quit.

    The second is (men don't seem to ever hear this no matter how many times I pull on my tongue!): Listen to the words that come out of my mouth. I mean what I say and I say what I mean!

    I'm glad you found yourself and still have time to live life the way you choose. I'm there, too. Welcome to the 50s! Aren't they grand?

working

This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

Show Details
Necessary
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Features
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Marketing
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Statistics
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)