Let's Play "The Game of Life."

We are so excited that you joined us for our first episode of “The Game of Life.” Thank you! Thank you! Your applause is greatly appreciated. My goodness, settle down. Let’s get started and have some fun.

For those of you who don’t know how this game works, this is a play-at-home contest, so even if you aren’t with us in the studio, you still have a chance to win. Make sure your cell phone is handy because after you’ve met all the contestants, you’ll be asked to vote for the winner by texting in.

Here’s how it works: we will introduce you to a number of United States citizens. We’ll tell you a little about them. When their histories are shared, we’ll ask you to vote for the person who is most important. A nation is only as strong as its citizens, and it is our hope that by weeding out the detritus of society, we can raise the stature of this great country. And who better to judge than all of you?

So let’s begin! We’ll start with Tim Bichsel from New York City, New York.

Tim is a single father of two rambunctious toddlers. His wife died giving birth to #2. It’s a tough road for Tim. Child care is not cheap. Tim works two part-time jobs to make ends meet, but from sunrise to sunset, it is a struggle. He pays his taxes on time, has had to use the credit card system, at times, to pay for necessities, and he has no savings.

The grandparents try to help but they are struggling too, so if there is a light at the end of Tim’s tunnel, he doesn’t see it. He has thought of going back to school for a degree, but there are no guarantees that he will find a better job even if he has a degree, so right now he’s treading water and trying to do the best he can for his two young children.

NATALIE THOMPSON

Natalie lives in the Silicon Valley and has a great paying mid-management job for a computer company. She has her 401K, she has stock options, she is unmarried and is on the fast-track for upper-management in five years.

A BMW is parked in the driveway of her 3,000 square foot home. She has a membership to a fitness club, sits on the board at the local art museum, and loves to go boating on the weekends. Life is, to say the least, good for Natalie, and she figures she will be able to retire by the time she is forty-five, and then she will travel around Europe and live a life of leisure.

Meet Bill Porter. Formerly Lieutenant William Porter of Abilene, Texas. Bill served two tours in Iraq back in the first war in that desert hellhole, and on his second tour he lost an arm when an IED exploded ten feet from where he was standing. From that moment it’s all been downhill for Bill. He came back from that second tour a bitter man. Eventually his wife left him and took the three kids with her. Bill tried to get help from the VA but somehow he fell between the cracks.

Now Bill is on the streets. Home is a cardboard shanty in a vacant lot on 5^th and Main, but he’ll have to move soon when the cops make their next sweep of the area. Most days Bill can be found on a street corner holding a sign asking for money, “wounded vet needs help,” but to most who pass by he is invisible.

At one time he had plans. He had dreams.

Now, nothing!

BRIANNE CALLAGHAN

Brianne is the mother of three in St. Charles, Louisiana. She is married to a wonderful man and great provider, and Brianne is living her dream of raising children with love and compassion. She volunteers in her spare time at the local Food Bank. She believes in recycling and helping to save the environment. She home-schools her children, makes sure they are active in sports and the arts, and can’t imagine a better life.

Outside her home is an American flag which she proudly displays. She loves to work in the vegetable garden, believing that organic foods are the only sensible eating choice. Her entire extended family is important to her, and she often organizes get-togethers on holidays and birthdays so her children can understand the importance of family.

Mr. Tayler is a CEO of a Fortune 500 corporation. Man alive, life is good and it’s great to be Mr. Josh Taylor. How cool it is to walk the streets of Chicago and have everyone know his name. Josh can’t remember the last time he struggled. Right out of Harvard Business School he landed a great gig, and from there his meteoric rise in the business world was predictable.

Work harder than anyone else; be smarter than anyone else; locked and loaded and take no prisoners; those are the mantras that has taken Josh this far in life, and he sees no reason to mess with a winning formula. He works fast, plays fast, spends fast, accumulates fast, and heaven help anyone who gets in his way.

LINDSAY BILLINGS

Lindsay is a hooker. There is no pretty way of saying that, is there? She works a street corner on Madison and Fourth in Seattle, Washington. Her pimp’s name is Clyde the Sly, and for the most part he treats her well. Rarely does he hit her and when he does, she figures she deserved it.

Her normal workday is four or five tricks at fifty per. After Clyde takes his share, Lindsay is left with fifty if she’s lucky, and lucky has never been associated with the name Lindsay. Born and raised in Los Angeles, California, Lindsay ran away from home when she was fourteen to get away from a sexually-abusive step-father and she’s never returned. She doubts her alcoholic mother even misses her.

As the day ends, Lindsay takes her fifty, buys dinner at the café down the block, then scores some crack to get her through the night.

Mr. Burnett is a United States Congressman. He has been in our nation’s capitol for…..oh never mind. A politician is never going to win this contest.

And those are our contestants today. Now we turn it over to you, the audience. You only get one vote, so make it count. Who do you think is the most important person in this group? The winner will be showered with gifts. The losers will be, well, losers. No reason to sugarcoat it, is there?

Remember that our goal is to form the strongest nation on earth, and the only way we can do that is to weed out the undesirables. Please take a long look at each contestant. What are their strengths? What are their weaknesses? How can each benefit society? How does each harm society?

You can vote using the handy poll inserted on the right side of this article, or text your vote to 123456.

Thanks for playing “The Game of Life” today. We hope you tune in next week for our next exciting competition.

Remember: America is counting on you!

2015 William D. Holland (aka billybuc)