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O.c.d./.com

Updated on June 3, 2022
MFB III profile image

Artist, actor, poet, teacher, songwriter & actor with 4,000 poems & almost 1,000 songs written, performed recorded & published on line.

Blank stares and endlessly unfinished masterpieces

Struggling to put a real face on their disorder
Struggling to put a real face on their disorder

My son has sufffered from O.C.D. for 28 years and there is no real end in sight

O.C.D./com

OCD.com

OCD.COM

What struggles 
they endure, 
an endless litany 
of the same, 
day in and day out.
Wanting to 
move beyond 
but always 
beyond moving. 
What courage 
it must take 
to fit in,
when so much 
time is consumed
in rituals that 
would make 
them outcasts.
Thirty minutes 
in the bathroom, 
touching mirrors, 
mirroring touches.
Clocks do not 
exist any longer,
rituals are now 
the hands on 
the face of time.
Hours spent arranging 
rearranging each day,
to fit the controls 
that control the fits,
amidst eyes of angst 

Anxieties, 
o v e r w h e l m,
fidget, tap tap, 
fidget, tap tap tap.
Perhaps a set of 
tap shoes and a dream,
but they can't be worn 
nor new,
they have to 
be just right
or on the right 
or right on,
and just right is 
never just right.
Hours spent worrying 
about hours spent
sleeping in the 
haze of a Zoloft 
high above all others
after seventy minutes 
of getting ready for bed.
Medicated adjustments 
tweaked bi-weekly
as doctors whisper in 
a call about Risperdal. 
warning that it 
can cause a nervous 
tic in one's face, 
permanently a flaw 
that can't be erased.
as if they didn't 
have enough 
to deal with 
Yet it has 
done wonders 
in O.C.D. cases.
So many choices 
so many habits
a ninety year old 
nun's closet of choices,
each one worn out religiously,
on the crosses 
O.C.D. kids bear.
The therapist is 
exactly that
pissed at the 
lackluster results,
but at $200.00 an hour 
the parents are 
even more pissed off,
resulting in tensions 
that bleed 
into emotions,
that upsets the child,
into much 
more anxiety.
A sad vicious circle
they all walk around,
days on end, 
ending in dazes.
The cure is 
the carrot
but the kid is 
a meat eater,
grown ravenous on pills.
3.3 million strong, 
in the U.S. alone,
obsessed and compelled,
for reasons 
still unknown.

© 2009 Matthew Frederick Blowers III

working

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