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On Suicide and Other Tragedies of Life

Updated on October 4, 2010

Another Friend Turns to Dust.

Many of you may remember when I wrote the hub about surviving suicide. Prior to my father's death in 1988, I had never experienced the loss of anyone. To be honest, that particular suicide was somewhat of a relief due to his violence and the threat he represented to our family. The full story is in my hub entitled, "Surviving a Suicide."

There were several other deaths of close family members after that which were traumatic and hard for me to deal with. Mostly, they were my grandparents, my great aunt, and my current father-in-law.

Then my ex-husband's sister was killed in a car accident. We weren't technically family anymore, but you never really forget the toddler you babysat and held close. Even when they are 19 and no longer a legal part of your family. She was in a Porsche with her dad, and they were driving home in the rain. The car had bald tires, they hydroplaned and hit a pole. The engine went through her head. That seemed to be the most traumatic thing I had ever experienced at the time.

The day Farrach Fawcett and Michael Jackson died, a young girl who was a close family friend and who had just had a new baby shot herself on the beach near my mother's house.

Then my cousin Smokey was murdered. I still don't know the whole story on that one, except that it may have involved drugs or a woman, and they caught the guy who did it after he had been given a ride by a guy who goes to my church to Fort Pierce right after he murdered my cousin.

This morning, my mother called me and said that another close family friend had called her this morning and said that his son had called him last night at 11pm and apologized shortly before he laid down on the tracks in front of a freight train. This man and this son of his helped me move into my house almost two years ago. They helped my sister move into her house last month.  Our whole family cared about him.  We are all devastated.

I am disheartened by the state of the world and the coldness of society. It is sickening to realize that people who have never experience hardships have little compassion for those who do. People fight their way to the top, when they should work together to achieve goals.

People work for companies for years like workhorses and are treated like dogs and then laid off with little to fall back on. A person has to be a rhino to survive this turmoil we call life. It is so hard to keep a positive attitude in the face of injustice and heartache. I am thankful for the good things I have in my life, but I have to admit feeling guilty when I see things I can't do anything to help. My poor friend. He was only 27. His father is an emotional mess now.

It would be so nice if people in powerful positions would realize how important it is to have compassion toward and be considerate of people in need. Everyone has their eye on the almighty dollar and very few people are watching out for their brothers. We are all one big family. We should look out for each other WAY more than we do.

Even if it is feeding someone, giving someone clothes, or lending an ear to someone who is in dire straits, it is so important to make that effort. It is also important to do this in a way that is not filled with ego. Don't do it because you are wanting to be noticed for doing it. Your reward will come later, maybe even when you are the one who is in need.


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    • advisor4qb profile image

      advisor4qb 6 years ago from On New Footing

      Thanks! God Bless You, also!

    • stars439 profile image

      stars439 6 years ago from Louisiana, The Magnolia and Pelican State.

      I have had the same kind of life as yours. Death, and violence in it. Best thing to do is live your life as happy as you can. Do all the things that you can afford to do and enjoy what is left of your life, and try to not let the sorrow bring you down. You have life that belongs to you. Enjoy it. God gave you that right to do that even if the sky falls down. God Bless You.

    • advisor4qb profile image

      advisor4qb 6 years ago from On New Footing

      If I do not pass on the things I have learned in my experience, then I suffered in vain.

      Thank you for your validating comment.

    • Mrs. J. B. profile image

      Mrs. J. B. 6 years ago from Southern California

      You have suffered deeply yet you still find the strength to educate others on what really needs done to prevent others from doing the same thing.

    • advisor4qb profile image

      advisor4qb 7 years ago from On New Footing

      Thanks, James.

    • James A Watkins profile image

      James A Watkins 7 years ago from Chicago

      I am sorry you have had to experience this emotional trauma. Please accept my condolences. I appreciate the message you conveyed. Well done.

    • advisor4qb profile image

      advisor4qb 7 years ago from On New Footing


    • profile image

      Shirley Pisa 7 years ago

      Losing a love one is always difficult. And it is always a tragic incident. I am glad things are going well for you today. Best of good things for you, advisor4qb

    • advisor4qb profile image

      advisor4qb 7 years ago from On New Footing

      Thanks. The funeral was really sad, and when the train went by, we all freaked out crying. IDK who planned that service, but they should have looked into the train schedule!

      Things are actually going VERY well for me, today in particular!

    • Gypsy Willow profile image

      Gypsy Willow 7 years ago from Lake Tahoe Nevada USA , Wales UK and Taupo New Zealand

      Such a sad run of events for you. I hope your future is brighter.

    • advisor4qb profile image

      advisor4qb 7 years ago from On New Footing


    • msorensson profile image

      msorensson 7 years ago

      I am deeply saddened by the first part of this hub, but found your appeal to those who make the decisions and your last paragraph, relieving...

      To live is a matter how difficult.

      It is a human instinct shared by animals, to survive.

      When people do commit suicide there is a pain that cannot be relieved...

      I too have had acquaintances and friends that have killed themselves. Since this cannot be undone, all we can do is to offer our shoulders to those who are in deep pain while we can.