- Personal Health Information & Self-Help
People In A Healthy Marriage Relationship Are Healthier
Marriage And Good Health
Marriage is an institution where the bride and groom take their vows which includes,"For Better, For Worse,In Sickness And In Health". Stepping on each other's toes is common during a marriage, but the relationship grows when both husband and wife cooperate on issues concerning finances, the children, jobs, motherinlaw, housework,....Key issues such as the above can ruin a marriage as well as help you to understand each other and come to meeting points. Studies show that people in an unhealthy marriage often have lesser immune defenses and the risk of diseases such as heart disease and diabetes, stroke are imminent. Marriage relationship needs to be built on understanding, trust, love and affection. The results of such a marriage relationship can be seen in the overall health of each of the partners,and even their children's emotional health. Life's challenges such as health issues, such as cancer, can be met together. Loss of a loved child or parent can be shared. Financial breakdowns and loss of job can be stressful, but all can be halved if shared with a partner who supports and understands even at such times instead of picking up fights on trivial issues and making matters worse. For, if you cannot go home with a problem and tell your partner about it, seeking help or just plain talk about it, you are not in a marriage where partners are at ease to share everything. Which makes one partner hide things which is detrimental to your marriage, if the spouse found out from some other source.
Health is important for all and being healthy in mind, body and spirit matters whether you are married or not. Stress in a marriage can be devastating and can be the cause for various illnesses. Studies reveal that married couples who have stress in their relationship are more susceptible to heart attacks than the ones with stress in their workplace. Those who are divorced or widowed also are more prone to illnesses and aches and pains a notch more than their married counterparts. Those who married a second or third time were still susceptible to lesser immune systems in their body than the only once-married couples. Single people are also open to stress levels that induce lesser immune defense mechanism and makes them vulnerable to disease. I am not advocating being single but the findings of scientists show that in general, all married couples that are into a healthy relationship with each other who can resolve issues as they crop up are truly happy and affectionate towards each other.
It does not matter whether you married for love or whether it was an arranged marriage, the relationship built over the years matters. Foundation of a good lasting marriage is not just physical attraction, for this body of ours takers a toll such as aging, wear and tear. Marriage is built on solid trust , love and affection. And there is no third person involved such as a motherinlaw or a lover. This causes repeated friction between the spouse and can erode your health. Constant stress due to a marriage on the rocks can be more harmful to your health than work pressure.
If you are single, find a good partner. If you do not find a suitable partner, you are better off single.
If you are widowed, or divorced , find a suitable partner.
If you are in a bad marriage where stress is taking a toll on your health and the children's health, opt out.
And if you are in a happy marriage, enjoy it to the full and that means even having some major issues , only resolve them quickly, without backstabbing and bringing up past wounds. Learn to let go of painful memories and use AFFECTION. Works wonders, you know. When I got married, my uncle who is today married for almost 50 years to the same woman, told me that the secret to a successful marriage is to face issues than run away, and resolve it quickly. NEVER ever go to bed with your backs turned on each other. Well, that was his take on a happy married life. And I found that impossible in my marriage. I learnt that heated arguments and ego clashes could get you no where after a hard day's work especially when you are very tired at bedtime. "After the darkest night, cometh the morning", and so,.... we just turned off to sleep and believe me, both would wake up by around 4 AM and find solutions to our problems and without any remorse or anger. So, every couple has there own way to sort things out, and for those who know that marriage is forever, the health benefits are compounded.
Affection is important and couples who show affection toward each other in good times and bad, are the most healthy. A kind word, a shoulder rub,a back rub, all show that you still care and are willing to make compromises and that keeps your relationship healthy and consequently, both enjoy a healthier life. Couples that engage in touching each other,holding each other's hands and kissing more often end up healthier. But, in our Indian culture where spouses do not indulge in touching each other outside their bedroom, arranged marriages have lasted for decades and the such spouses are the healthiest. That is because, most of them are married when they are young-18 or younger for the bride and 21 or younger for the groom. The bride is welcomed into the husband's home, and most often it turned out to be a joint family with the parents and siblings of the groom. If the siblings were married, it was one big large family that included three generations. Some brides found it difficult to adjust and some were made comfortable with the result that those that were shown more affection by the husband enjoyed healthier life. It was not so much the quality of life as the husband's affection that mattered and also the bride was taught to earn his trust and affection, even before marriage. In such cultures, though the spouses were rarely seen talking to each other or holding hands in public, they were emotionally very attached perhaps because of the demands of society in which they live. And they were seen to be very supportive of each other when dealing with their daily tasks and the bringing up of children. The strong emotional bond between the couple is usually demonstrated when they speak to each other with respect and during bickering with the other members of the family, put in a supportive word. And for them, marriage is for keeps. This releases tension of any kind and no matter what their financial state is in, they stick to each other. Spouses in such marriages generally tend to be happy since they have the support of other family members and they remain healthy and live to a ripe old age.
Negative emotions such as anger and jealousy, need to be held in check and more positive emotions such as affection, and love must be demonstrated for a marriage to remain healthy, thereby keeping you healthy.
It takes both spouses to work together in making their marriage successful. But it takes only one to break it. Choose to make your marriage work no mater what and be preapred for a little give and take and you will enjoy a beautiful, heavenly, long-termed marriage relationship that will keep you happy and healthy. One that others would like to emulate.
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