Perverts, Flirts and Girls On Show: A Few Short Anecdotes from the Swimming Pool (Part 2)

It’s a sad fact that when you go swimming you just can’t really cover up your body, trust me, I would if I could. It’s just not practical to swim in shorts and t-shirt especially since I’m not the strongest swimmer and all the extra weight would weigh me down. So I don’t appreciate it when men a good forty years older than me swim towards me and make patronising comments while they stare at my chest. There was a group of about six people standing at the opposite side of the swimming pool to me and I’d swam passed them about twice when two of the men swam back towards me. When they stopped one of them came over to me and made some comment about how I’d only gone round twice and was that the best I could do … words to that effect. I bit my tongue and smiled and thought that for the fifteen minutes I’d been in the pool he’d not moved at all and that I stop for two minutes and get berated for it. That’s when I decided it must just have been some clever rouse to stare at my tits.

I’ve had two guys who were closer to my age start proper conversations with me. The first was the guy I mentioned in Part 1 who kicked the old man in the shoulder. He was alright to talk to, although we didn’t really talk about much, mainly just about swimming. He told me about where there was parking that I wouldn’t have to pay for and he sort of seemed interested in what I had to say. I think he was showing off a bit too, swimming really fast and going off to do somersaults off the diving board. I don’t know if it was for my benefit or not. Either way, he seemed like a fairly decent guy.

The second guy was really really fat. I’m not trying to be mean or anything he just was really really fat. He couldn’t seem to work out why he was having such difficulty swimming from one end to the other. I could tell him why. For starters, he’d swim off from one side thrashing his arms fiercely against the water like some crazy person trying to stop themselves from drowning. Then he started thrashing his legs around and he was surprised that he was out of breath before he got to the other end, not to mention the whole being fat thing. Anyway, he started talking to me. He introduced himself, although now I can’t remember what he said his name was. I can’t really remember what we talked about either, other than that he said he was doing something or other after swimming. He asked me if I was doing anything afterwards, so I said I was just going home, to which he said ‘ah you lazy bum!’ Um, excuse me???!!! I’m SWIMMING how can I be lazy? I thought the idea was that if you had a proper workout you would tire yourself out. How does going home after swimming make me lazy?

My other story (if you can call it that) is just a conversation I was listening in to (in my usual discrete way). As I swam up to one end of the pool there was a girl and a guy chatting away. They were talking about people they knew or somewhere they’d both been … something like that. I assumed that they were friends, or at least knew each other. Anyway, the guy swam off and the girl’s friend swam up to her. Girl number one said ‘I was just chatting to that guy about … (whoever it was). I think he was here last time we were,’ and on that basis alone she inferred, ‘I think I’ve pulled.’