ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Seven Years After Our Loss - An Update

Updated on March 19, 2013

First, A Word of Thanks

After writing my first Hub three years ago, I have been overwhelmed by the amount of support that I have received. It is not easy to open wounds but it is such a blessing to know that God has used my experiences to help others. To read more about my story please visit my other Hubs. It has been difficult for me to write and process my feelings because unlike the popular belief that "time heals all wounds", after losing a child "time" just seems to bring new wounds to deal with. I'm not saying that God has not been faithful as I continue this walk - He has and continues to be - but this is a journey and one that has it's ups and downs. The reason I wanted to write this update is because I wanted to share what God is doing in our life at this time.

God Works Through a Sister

After losing her older sister, my younger daughter struggled but was also strengthened in her walk with God. She has shared her testimony many times in the last seven years and was married last summer to a youth pastor. Together, they work with middle school and high school students to share God's love. It has been a blessing to watch how He has worked everything out for good in her life!

A Plan, A Dream

A couple of weeks ago we celebrated, yes we chose to call it celebrating, Kristi's 7th year in heaven with my daughter and her new husband. It was a sweet (TV-free) time of fun and conversation. I am so thankful for what God is doing through them although the distance is taking a toll on all of us as they are now 22 hours away; our family has been through so much that I really believe we are meant to be closer.

I was thinking back on this past year - Mattie getting married - moving across the country - but also about the birth of a dream. Let me back up a bit.............last summer while planning a wedding we were also planning a road trip across several states to help them move to their new home and new life on Hilton Head Island in South Carolina. At about the same time I found out that my great grandmother's family was from upper state SC and had lived on a plantation there. My great grandmother was a very special lady and I of course wanted to see this plantation - well it turned out that it was for sale - which got the history teacher and romantic in me to thinking about how cool it would be to open a bed and breakfast in the area where my family had lived - so Rick and I planned a little side trip to see the plantation. In so doing we found another bed and breakfast in the area to spend the night - oh, did I mention that it was also for sale? As we drove north from Hilton Head I can't tell you how beautiful and peaceful it was. In a strange way I felt very at home. On the way to the bed and breakfast we found my family's plantation. I'm so thankful that I got to see it and although beautiful it was not really b and b material. When we arrived at the gracious Inn, my heart skipped a beat - this huge majestic house radiated warmth and hospitality. Surrounded by lush landscaping, Rick and I sat on the porch and listened to a symphony of birds' songs as we de-stressed after some very busy, wedding preparation months. What I felt there reminded me of another time - the summer after losing Kristi we were invited to spend some time in northern Arizona. We were hosted by some dear people who just spent time with us and shared the amazing mountains and landscapes which represented God's beauty after a time of terror and heartache. I can't explain it but that week began the healing process for me as I drank in God's majesty and was given the freedom to talk or not talk with people who truly cared about what I was going through. The memory of that time and the peacefulness of this new place were the seeds for the dream - what if I could create that same oasis for other hurting parents - the parents that I still receive emails from, crying and begging me for hope after the loss of their own children. Little did I know that Rick was thinking the same thing.

It is now a few months short of a year later and we have prayed, talked, figured and prayed some more and the dream just won't go away. Despite the obstacles, we still believe that this is where God is leading us. In case I have been allusive, our dream is to buy that Bed and Breakfast and use it not only as our career and livelihood, but also a place where I can host the parents that I still receive emails from, a place where they can come, free of charge and expectation, and experience God's beauty and peace if only for a short time. We have drawn up a business plan and are confident that the bed and breakfast, which is also a wedding venue, would support itself as well as the ministry to parents who have lost children. There are obstacles, as I mentioned, we need to sell our house (it is currently on the market) and although the current owners of the Bed and Breakfast are willing to finance, they require a very large down payment - something that we do not have - but we are trusting that God will provide if it truly is His will. After losing Kristi, I have always felt that there would be some type of ministry that God would provide where we could use our experience to honor not only her memory but most of all His greatness - could this be it?

Comments

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    No comments yet.

    working

    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

    Show Details
    Necessary
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Features
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Marketing
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Statistics
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)