"Sex lies at the root of life, and we can never learn to reverence life until we know how to understand sex."~Havelock Ellis
Whether you love it, hate it, pursue it, or have a vow of celibacy, sex touches each and everyone of us on the deepest levels of our being. Without sex, you would not be here to read this article.
It's time to bring sex into the light of day and look at it for what it truly is. It's time to put away the oppression, superstition, and foolishness and time to open our hearts and minds and look at what sex really is.
Who's with me on this?
There is no life without sex. Yet it's the biggest controversy the world has ever seen. People today are still condemned, killed, and persecuted, all because of this unavoidable phenomena called sex. I believe it's even bigger and more heavily debated than religion or politics put together.
Yes, people, it's sex. Go ahead and say it out loud. SEX. It's okay, really.
Some would say our instincts of desiring sex is because we need to have that interest in order to procreate. Some would say it was a blessed gift to us from God/Goddess/Spirit of choice..... Of course that gets confused with "Thou Shalt Not Lust", but lust over something is not the same as experiencing sexual pleasure in a consenting relationship (That relationship may be with yourself as well).
Unfortunately, due to that misunderstanding, and several others that have conveniently concocted themselves over the years, sex has been used to control us. It’s used against us to create feelings of guilt and shame. Our most basic human instinct is used against us by whatever manipulative intentions religions, media, or society deems acceptable or neccessary for their own selfish agendas.
Children grow up with all sorts of misinformation about sex because so many adults are quite simply too intimidated themselves to even know how to talk about it openly. We raise these kids to be afraid of their bodies, afraid to know how to pursue a healthy intimate relationship. Or worse, they learn about sexuality from the ever increasingly twisted media. Believe me folks, that can really screw a kid up if that is the information they use to base their personal decisions on.
Sex educators are too busy telling the kids that sex leads to them getting pregnant, diseased, dead and going straight to hell. In all that gloom and doom, they forget to tell them it's natural to have sexual feelings. Even parents get so confused, they forget to tell the children that sexual feelings are a prime, base instinct, shared by all mammals. It's not some horrible sin to be ashamed of or embarrassed about.
It's about taking responsibility for your sexuality that's important. It should be enjoyed and pursued in an appropriate (i.e. consenting) relationship at an appropriate age, and not just for procreation.
Oh, and don’t get me started on how sex is for women. That whole Madonna/Whore thing, “good girls don’t”, etc.. Sexual stereotypes, while slowly breaking up, are still rampant and many women suffer from the effects. It’s time to heal ladies. Claim your sexuality and don’t allow anyone to ever take it away from you.
Left alone, sex is beautiful, it's enjoyable and it's time to allow sex to have a revered, not feared place in our lives. Anyone who would read the Songs of Solomon in the Bible, or delve more deeply into the sacred texts across many religions, will see that sex has been given at least some of the esteem as it deserves.
Putting all the propaganda, superstitions, and religious affronts aside, let's take an objective look at some benefits that should show proof positive of why sex is not only supposed to be enjoyed, it's can actually be a life saving pastime. In fact, it needs to be enjoyed and pursued. Our bodies are made to become healthier and we even have a longer life span if sex is pursued in a responsible and joyful manner.
Sex is Good for Your Heart
- Having sex reduces your risk of heart disease. In a 2001 follow-on to the Queens University study mentioned above, researchers focused on cardiovascular health. They found that having sex three or more times a week, men reduced their risk of heart attack or stroke by half.
- Sex boosts your cardiovascular fitness, Even mild sex a couple times a week will give your heart a health enhancing work-out.
Sex Helps Prevent Cancer
- Sex helps keep the prostate healthy. Some urologists believe they see a relationship between infrequency of ejaculation and cancer of the prostate. Be careful with this one guys. Having sex with multiple partners can, all by itself, raise a man’s risk of cancer by up to 40%. That’s because he runs an increased risk of contracting sexual infections. You are better off doing it solo if you don’t have a monogamous partner.
- A study recently published by the British Journal of Urology International asserts that men in their 20s can reduce their chance of getting prostate cancer by a third. They do this by ejaculating more than five times a week. That is with or without a partner gentlemen, so do it for yourself if your partner can't keep up.
Sex Enhances Women's Gynecological Health
- Endocrinologists at Columbia and Stanford universities found that women who have sex at least once a week have more-regular menstrual cycles than those who do it once in a blue moon.
- Sex tones the pelvic muscles that support your uterus, bladder, and bowel, meaning better pee control amongst other obvious benefits.
Sex Helps You Get and Stay Fit
- Sex is one of the safest sports you can take up. It stretches and tones just about every muscle in the body. A vigorous bout burns some 200 calories–about the same as running 15 minutes on a treadmill.
- Sex boosts production of testosterone, which leads to stronger bones and muscles. Men’s Health magazine has gone so far as to call the bed the single greatest piece of exercise equipment ever invented.
Sex Improves Quality of Breathing
- Sex helps you breathe better. Sex is a natural antihistamine which helps combat asthma and hay fever.
- Having sex improves your sense of smell. After sex, production of the hormone prolactin surges which causes stem cells in the brain to develop new neurons in the brain’s olfactory bulb, which is your brain’s smell center.
Sex is a Healthy Stress Reliever
- Sex is an instant cure for mild depression. It releases the chemical endorphin into the bloodstream that gives you a sense of euphoria and well-being.
- The hormone DHEA also spikes to five times its normal level and this is associated with longevity, enhanced libido, building muscle mass, and warding off depression.
- Sex is ten time more effective than valium. It’s the safest tranquilizer in the world.
Sex Relieves Pain
- Sex is a great for relieving pain. Levels of the hormone oxytocin surge to five times their normal level right before you orgasm. The surge of oxytocin releases endorphins, which alleviate the pain of everything from headache, arthritis, and even migraines.
- For women, sex also prompts production of estrogen, which can reduce the pain of PMS and make the whole menstrual process go more smoothly with reduced symptoms.
Sex Helps Keep You Healthy
- Sex improves your immune system. Wilkes University in Pennsylvania says people that have sex once or twice a week show a thirty percent higher level of an antibody called immunoglobulin A, which is known to boost the immune system.
- Oral sex helps give you healthier teeth. Seminal plasma contains zinc, calcium and other minerals shown to retard tooth decay.
Sex Makes You More Attractive
- Sex is the perfect beauty treatment. Scientific tests find that when woman make love they produce amounts of the hormone estrogen, which make hair shiny and skin smooth.
- For both men and women, it reduces your chances of suffering dermatitis, skin rashes, and blemishes due to the sweat that’s produced when you’re engaging in it.
- It cleanses your pores and leaves your skin glowing.
- When you are sexually active, your body gives off greater quantities of chemicals called pheromones which naturally attract others to you.
- Having sex three or more times a week can take up to ten years off your looks.
Sex Improves Relationships
- Taking time to create wonderful sexual experiences for your partner increases your emotional, mental, and spiritual bonds with them. Don’t forget those same benefits can be applied to yourself!
- Couple's that share a fulfilling sex life avoid many intimacy problems and infidelity issues that lead to break-ups and divorce.
- A successful sex life improves your self-confidence in all other areas of your life including professionally and socially.
These are the things that sex is truly made of. We are learning more and more everyday about how pursuing a healthy sex life benefits us. It's the reason why I specifically began HappyHer.com and her sister sites so that I could help promote the pursuit of a healthy, fulfilling, and yes, fun sexuality.
It's time for us to embrace our sexuality and truly open up to the pleasures that sex can gift us with. Let's celebrate sex in the light of day, not as something shameful and debased. Let's educate our children in a way that makes sex healthy, responsible, and a joy to look forward to, not loaded with fear tactics and superstition.
Again, I ask, who is with me on this?