The Addiction Dictionary
Otherwise Known As Addictionary
The use of addictive substances has tripled in the United States over the past decade. The percentages are higher internationally.
Read that again. The numbers have tripled in ten years.
How many addicts are there in the world? That is an impossible question. It might be possible to count the number of alcoholics and come to a reasonable approximation. The same can be said of cocaine addicts and meth addicts and heroin addicts. But now toss in those addicted to gambling and sex and prescription drugs and overeating and……and….and…..
Yes, an impossible question! It might be easier to count the number of fleas on a homeless mongrel.
So this dictionary is for all of you….literally for the hundreds of millions of addicts in the world who have, in one way or another, found a crutch to help them get through life, or to escape life; whichever one applies.
A IS FOR…..ANGST
Yes, that feeling of dread, anxiety, and apprehension. Some might call it revulsion…some would be correct in that assessment.
B IS FOR…..BONE TIRED
The battle is never-ending. The need increases, the hope decreases and dreams of a brighter future fade with each passing day.
C IS FOR…..CARNIVOROUS
The disease is eating you alive. From the inside out, your mind, your body, your spirit, all devoured by the living being that can never be satiated.
D IS FOR…..DISCONNECT
Reality or delusion? What is real when you are not in control of your life? How can you possibly make an intelligent decision when you live in a distorted state?
E IS FOR…..EXCESS
One is too many and one hundred not enough. That is the world you live in now. There is no quieting the beast no matter how much you inhale, ingest or inject.
Well worth watching this video
F IS FOR…..FAILURE
Each day begins with a solemn vow to beat the addiction, but that solemn vow lasts what? Two hours? Four? Six? Willpower is useless and invariably feelings of personal failure enter your consciousness.
G IS FOR…..GAMBLE
The longer you ride this addiction the more you gamble with your life. Make no mistake about it: addictions kill, literally thousands daily and the number is increasing.
H IS FOR…..HELL
It is a living hell you live in. The life you once knew, the carefree, happy, unlimited possibilities life is now gone, replaced by need and hopelessness.
I IS FOR…..IDENTITY
The personal characteristics for which you were once known are rapidly disappearing. You are a mere shadow of the person you once were, and looking in a mirror is now a painful experience.
J IS FOR…..JADED
Excess has made you dull and insensitive. You are constantly fatigued, worn out and feeling defeated. The once vibrant colors that defined you are now varying shades of gray.
A powerful declaration by an addict
There is help if you want it
- Alcoholics Anonymous :
National Office of Alcoholics Anonymous
Overeaters Anonymous
- Overeaters Anonymous - I put my hand in yours, and together we can do what we could never do alone.
National site for Overeaters Anonymous
K IS FOR…..KARMA
Your fate or destiny is a foregone conclusion under the grips of addiction. The total effect of your actions have determined a life that will only get worse and never better.
L IS FOR…..LACKING
Everything you once knew is lacking. Your cognitive skills are diminishing. Your physical prowess is diminishing. Your thirst and hunger for life is diminishing and, if allowed to go much longer, your desire to live will be lacking.
M IS FOR…..MOROSE
Marked by or showing gloom, and most certainly addiction is a gloomy state of existence. Where has the happiness gone to? Where is the carefree person who once inhabited your body? Gone the way of addiction; the only question is whether that person will ever return.
N IS FOR…..NORMALCY
And what is normal in this new life of addiction? Certainly not what it once was. Now normal consists of quieting the beast, maintaining and functioning rather than enjoying the spontaneity of life.
O IS FOR…..OPPRESSION
A feeling of being heavily weighed down and oh how that describes your new life of addiction. Everything is a major chore; everything seems to be a burden.
P IS FOR…..PATIENT
Food addiction survivor
Q IS FOR…..QUESTIONS
You have a million questions but you have run out of answers. Why can’t I drink like everyone else? Why can’t I eat normally? Why can’t I do recreational drugs occasionally? What’s wrong with me? Why am I weak?
R IS FOR…..RESPONSIBILITIES
A subtle shift is happening as the addiction becomes your friend and lover. All other responsibilities become less important. Eventually you will reach the stage where your only responsibility is to your addiction and then life as you once knew it will end.
S IS FOR…..SADNESS
Not a sadness like when you don’t get a promotion you wanted, or you see a little child crying; no, this sadness will be bone-deep and penetrate every fiber of your being. It is the sadness of hopelessness and it will soon become all-encompassing.
T IS FOR…..TERMINAL
It has been said that, untreated, the only ends of alcoholism and drug addiction are jail, institutions or death. I suspect other addictions have the same terminals. There are no happy endings if addiction is left untreated or ignored.
U IS FOR…..USELESS
Everything you have tried has failed. Willpower has failed. Trying to manipulate the addiction has failed. Trying moderation has failed. Given enough failure, one soon feels useless, and it is a short journey from useless to defeat.
The ugly truth...this is hard to watch
Do you have an addiction?
V IS FOR…..VISUALIZE
Form a mental image of complete defeat. Form a mental image of lost loves, lost possessions, and lost self-respect. If you can visualize it you can attain it….through addiction.
W IS FOR…..WRESTLING
You find yourself wrestling the thousand-pound gorilla that is addiction. Life is a constant battle of maintaining and attempting to function in a world that is moving much faster than you are.
X IS FOR…..X-RAY
Take a look inside of you. Look in your heart. Look in your mind. What do you see? Can you even identify the person you once were? Do you recognize who you have become?
Y IS FOR…..YET
Well I haven’t been arrested yet! I haven’t lost my family yet! I haven’t lost my job yet, and I haven’t lost my health yet! Well keep on with that addiction and all of your “yets” will come true.
Z IS FOR…..ZILCH
Zip…Zero….Zilch…that is what your life will be worth if you do not get help with your addiction. Count on it. Set your clock by it. It is inevitable, as sure as the tides and the setting sun, and the sun will surely set on your life if you do not reach out for help.
And Now for the Good News
The help that you so desperately need is available. That’s the good news. The bad news is that you have to be willing to go to any lengths to regain your life.
Are you willing, or are you not yet there? Have you suffered enough or are you not yet at capacity? Are you sad enough yet? Disgusted enough yet? Broken and defeated enough yet?
Sadly, the only person who can answer those questions is the addict, and he/she is impaired in their decision-making abilities. Many do choose life and lead wonderful lives in recovery. Many do not choose that path, and their outcome is predictable and tragic.
There is only one question, then, that remains: how bad do you want it?
2013 William D. Holland (aka billybuc)
“Raising awareness one person at a time.”
