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The Second Year Of Grieving

Updated on July 10, 2019

When Life Moves On And You Are Still Left Grieving

The first year of losing a loved one can be especially hard for family and friends to deal with. You may deal with shock or life may seem surreal. You might have support from others in those first few months after the death. Cards might have been sent to your house along with flowers and gift baskets in hopes of bringing comfort to you.

After all the family and friends stop calling and asking how you are, you might hit a point where you feel alone in your grieving. You might not want to mention anything about it because you feel that others may expect that you should no longer be grieving.

The Second Year of Grief

Then comes the second year of grieving. There are still anniversaries, birthdays and holidays that will be thought about or celebrated without your loved one being present. Those special days may hurt just as much as the first year. More time has passed since you saw or spoke to your loved one, so this gives you more time to miss that person.

If you are still feeling the heaviness of grief during the second year or even the third year or beyond, know that you are not alone. Grief is different for everyone so some people may feel better during the second year. I do not think grief is really something you get over but rather something you get through.

You still have a life to live and you can not possibly let grief absorb every aspect of your life. There may be times when you feel like you had a good couple of weeks. You may have thought of happy memories and you could actually smile looking back on them. Then all of the sudden, out of nowhere, it hits you. The grief comes back and you are again feeling the sadness that it brings.

Grief is such a difficult process for a person to go through. There are so many emotions that can be felt at the time grieving. That is the reason why it is recommended that a person not make any major life decisions during the first year of grieving. What about the second year and beyond? When you have had all that time away from your loved one to fully experience the loss. When the person's death becomes so real that you are no longer in shock or disbelief that your loved one is gone.

Grief Support Groups

If you still feel the sadness of grief after the first year, you may want to talk to someone who can help you to process your feelings. Some people may experience a deep sadness that interferes with their life and those around them. You can reach out for help by contacting a grief support group in your area.

A grief support group is a place where you can be around people who can relate to what you are going through. They can offer you the gift of compassion, understanding and a listening ear. You can learn how others have experienced loss and how they are coping with their losses. It might help you to feel that you are not alone in the grieving process. Just a simple hug from another person who can relate to you may help you feel better.

I have attended a grief group and found it beneficial for my healing. It helped me to share my experience and talk about my loved one. I noticed that it was also helpful to the other people in the group who were discussing their grief. These people were able to talk about it within a supportive environment. It also helps to talk about your loved one and keep their memory alive because this person was so important to you.

I have learned that it is important to grieve. You must feel those feelings and get those tears out. However, grief can consume some people to the point where it is making them physically ill or severely depressed. If this is still happening to you after the first year of grieving, you might want to reach out for help. This article was meant for you to know that you are not alone in your grieving. Also, that it is possible to eventually heal from the intense pain that you may still be feeling.


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