ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

The Filthy Belt

Updated on November 29, 2010

Germs

None of us would ever want to have poop on our hands, would we? What if we were inadvertantly getting a small, invisable amount on ourselves on a daily basis? Sounds horrifying? Well, it is!

Check this out: If you take a dump in a public restroom, do you leave your pants down around your ankles as you shuffle to the sink to wash your hands? No. Of course not! If you did, someone might enter the restroom and laugh at you as your pants swabbed up and collected filth from the bathroom floor! People might think you have mental retardation or that you're some kind of perv!


Instead, what we usually do is, we wipe, zip up, button and fasten our belts. Then we exit the stall to promptly cleanse our palms and digits. But we touched our, zipper, button, and belt just after wiping!


Now think about it. Hopefully, the feces doesn't actually contact our hands, and instead, just touches the toilet paper. But if that were a sure thing, then why would we even bother to wash our hands afterward? We know that there is a good possibility that a tiny smudge of crap may have made its way to our fingertips, so we wash our hands. But between wiping and washing, we have touched the tips of our belts. Tiny bits of poop are deposited there day after day after day. Our belts are filthy!


When we get dressed in the morning, we put on our belts and don't think about washing our hands afterward. We get a tiny bit of poop on our hands and then touch the doorknobs in our house leaving a tiny drop of aged feces for our loved ones to encounter. And they do the same to us, so we are trading these germs with our family and friends and then we go eat a roast beef sandwich and ingest each others' shit!

Why am I writing about this? Do I want people to stop putting poop in their mouths? Do I want people to stop using belts or waddle out of bathrooms stalls with their pants down, or sell hand sanitizer or some crap? No! I don't give a fuck about any of that! My belt is contaminated right now and I don't plan to do anything about it! After years of use, it's more poop than belt.

What I DO want to convey is that we have to start cleaning doorknobs more often and anything that hands usually touch like phones, keyboards, computer mice, and pens! Yes, pens! They are filthy as hell! Don't ever put pens in your mouth!

Think about the Avian flu and the Swine flu and cooties. Think about how easy it is to spread this shit around!


Here's some more interesting germ info. Do you know what the filthiest thing in a hotel room is? It's the remote control for the TV. Nobody ever, ever, ever cleans them. People order XXX movies, jerk off, splash semen everywhere, and subsequently grasp the remote. Or they might bang a hooker and then change the channel. People who "bump uglies" with prostitutes don't take the time to wash their paws before clutching a hotel TV remote; and Jaunita the cleaning lady doesn't scrub down and sterilize that thing between guests.


So go ahead and kick back and enjoy a good show in your room while eating cheetos and getting that orange fuzz on your fingertips and licking it off while channel surfing and ingesting microbes from a herpes infested ho that was anally penetrated! Now you know how you got that sore in your mouth!

Should we all become obsessive-compulsive hypochondriacs like Howie Mandel? Maybe. Maybe he's on to something.


Comments

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • Jenna~sea profile image

      Jenna~sea 

      7 years ago from Oregon

      You are one of a kind!!! I keep spic&span with me when i go in public places/ yes i said i toat around houshold cleaner!! IT is the best germ killer because it kill's everything from e.coli to staph! the only down fall i that it take's about ten min. to work so to be safe i keep disinfectant wipe's in my purse.now i might not ever look at a hotel room the same way again !!! Thank's mikey ******

    • FCEtier profile image

      Chip 

      8 years ago from Cold Mountain

      Don't touch that "remote" in the motel room!

    working

    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

    Show Details
    Necessary
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Features
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Marketing
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Statistics
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)