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What Do You Need to Know About Feelings

Updated on October 14, 2018
DDE profile image

Devika enjoys sharing her work with a friendly community. Writing is a big part of her life. Online work has improved her lifestyle.

Feelings are not factual

  • Don't be controlled by your feelings!

Feelings can control you if you allow these feelings to get into your head. Some couples choose to be together, with the acceptance of tolerating each other’s behaviors emotionally. You learn more than you really understand. That is a complicated part of life that involves feelings. Your daily lives have feelings to deal with and it is up to you.

Relationships are not always rosy even up to this day. Some couple do strive for that perfect relationship. Like the more rosy kind of a relationship. Unfortunately, they don't always get what they wish for in their relationships.

  • When anger is the key to their relationships there is not much to do about such behaviors.

No matter whom you are or where you come from anger can be the worst aspect in a relationship. What you don't see is how relationships are affected by anger.

  • Still couples stay together and don't divorce.

Seeing someone you really care about go through great emotional pain can ruin you. You got to understand the points of views from the other person before diving in and accusing and making your voice heard.

Anger can destroy many relationships but if you handle the moment calmly you can be friends with all. You need to be connected to know where the problem lies and with whom the problem lies.

  • How does anger affect partners?

Most couples expect too much from their relationships. One partner can be the one in control and the other totally dependent on the one with power. Anger is expressed differently in both partners. Partners are affected by anger verbally and non-verbally.

The one who holds the house hold duties together is the one who controls the other. Usually that is the case, and in many situations anger can build up There is always anger with partners who want to gain control.

I know from my experience that without me not much can be organist in my home this includes documents and household duties. I don't have power or control we live our lives differently. I keep all the files up-to-date and know where to find any document if required.

If I am asked of anything from a file while I am still in bed in the morning, I get annoyed and refuse to search for it. This can become unhealthy if any one who keeps up such behaviors. I try not to stay with that kind of behavior.

I know it is not good for me or my partner. Keeping a secret from you partner is another situation that can cause anger for you and your partner. When you fail to keep up to your values with the shame, and guilt you have in you then anger can creep up slowly.

  • Conflict causes anger and less agreements.

The pressure of what you do allows for anger to set in with many partners. One can learn to accept the tolerant habits and can have a certain amount of control of anger. Mostly the healthy relationships succeed with anger.

  • Do you think feelings can be controlled?

If you avoid your feelings it can affect your health and ruin your chances of a better life. In a healthy relationship you are able to feel your emotions, and being able to feel your feelings is not a simple skill to act on upon.

Why is it not simple to feel your feelings?

Feelings appear when you are in the middle of situations.

  • For example:

You feel when you are experiencing a stressful moment, then you realize more than you have had from before. Once you understand what brought up those feelings you will know more.

It is normal to feel like your feelings are out of control. Sometimes you can feel awfully attacked by your feelings. When you let your feelings take over you feel like you have run the marathon.

The heart rate increases and you feel anxious. The main focus here is to think with your body and not with your head. If you think with your head will surely allow your feelings to control you and that you don't need. Deep breathing allows for staying calm and a more relaxed in the mind.

  • When do you have feelings?

Feelings pop up during a bad time or a good time. You create these feelings during such moments. Feelings pop up unless you make them do. Make note of what made you create such feelings and follow that lead. I am less calm on certain issues, especially if I need to reason with someone. I need to make my point heard. My created feelings get into action. I build up anger or sadness nobody can do that for me or to me.

  • I control those feelings easily

Certain situations can create those moments and you can become helpless. When you have many mixed emotions these emotions can last much longer. Feel free to make a note of what makes you that way.

  • What caused you to be angry, or sad?

  • What made you feel depressed?

  • Who made you feel disappointed?

  • Who caused you to be confident?

In some cases, what you did not create can be the act of another. Holding in your feelings can make you feel emptier inside. If in the company of negative people, you too, can end up feeling the same way. One of my reasons for staying away from negative people is of their contagious feelings.

Happier people improve your feelings much better. The right connection with people can make you feel most fulfilled with life. The way you react to life is what feelings are and feelings are not factual.

I know that there is no right or wrong feelings. I react to what my body tells me and to what I have created with great control. Every individual has a right to express their feelings and not to suppress their feelings.

How they choose to react to their feelings is entirely up to them. People react differently to all situations. Some can remain calm while others may go into a panic mode right away. Speak out your feelings holding on to secrets and bad experiences can damage you emotionally.

From my garden

Control your Feelings

Be positive

  • Be honest with your feelings.

If you don't speak up, your anger can build up and you can start to lash out at others randomly. Write to communicate with your feelings that would certainly give you a better life emotionally. There is no perfection in life. I feel anxious when I am expecting guests, and want everything to be perfect. I know that perfection does not come easy, and to live by perfection would spoil me.

I try to be most simple and calm and relax my mind to think of enjoying the moment rather than expect too much. I avoid the manifestation of my thoughts instead, I prefer to be normal and nice.

I don't allow such thoughts to control me. I believe that understanding is the key to any feelings and if you fail to understand feelings all can get lost in relationships.

Feelings is not always controlled as you let your thoughts control your mind and that affects your feelings. You need to be confident and happier to have that calm feelings.People look at their lifestyles and complain but never think of how lucky they actually are.

Feelings can ruin you if Kept inside

Can you control your feelings?

See results

© 2014 Devika Primić


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    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      4 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Hi D.A.l. Hope you had a good weekend. Weather is warmer here in Croatia and definitely a great time of the year. Feelings are mixed emotions at times and if one is not able to control their feelings they would have to seek professional help. Thank you for the vote up, interesting and useful I appreciate your time and effort.

    • D.A.L. profile image


      4 years ago from Lancashire north west England

      Once again you have addressed the subject of emotions in your usual intelligent way. A lot of readers will gain valuable knowledge from this article,if they are wise enough to take in your message and meaning. Voted up,interesting and useful.

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      4 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      jtrader thank you for stopping by I appreciate your kindness.

    • jtrader profile image


      4 years ago

      Interesting analysis DDE. We can get better at controlling ourselves over time if we give it a chance to become a habit. Ms Dora made a similar point.

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      4 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      epbooks control is important unfortunately not every one can be in control thank you.

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      4 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Hi CyberShelley you practiced anger in a different method and a great example indeed. Thank you

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      4 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Hi AliciaC thank you kindly for stopping by at my hubs.

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      4 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Hi MsDora thank you

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      4 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      billybuc you said all so perfectly thank you.

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      4 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      goodnews11 thank you for sharing your thoughts and for the vote up. I appreciate you stopping by.

    • epbooks profile image

      Elizabeth Parker 

      4 years ago from Las Vegas, NV

      It's not easy to control how we feel, but definitely the first step is understanding them...and then control how we act. In-depth hub about feelings, and very interesting!

    • CyberShelley profile image

      Shelley Watson 

      4 years ago

      So many truths here Devika. Anger is a dangerous one, when my son was young I compared anger to fire for him. A lit match or candle is good, like anger, fire must be controlled. If not it's like a bush fire, it just destroys everything in its path.

    • AliciaC profile image

      Linda Crampton 

      4 years ago from British Columbia, Canada

      There are lots of interesting thoughts about feelings and emotions in this hub, Devika. Thanks for sharing them.

    • MsDora profile image

      Dora Weithers 

      4 years ago from The Caribbean

      Self-control is not easy, but we can mature into making it habit. Self-control means controlling our feelings (and everything else about us).

    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 

      4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Understanding feelings and controlling them are two different things, now aren't they? But the first step is, of course, understanding them.

    • goodnews11 profile image


      4 years ago from CHENNAI

      "If you don't speak up your anger can build up and you can start to lash out at others randomly."

      Well said!! Thats true!!

      Voted Up.


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