Consciously Loving Yourself
What Is Self Love?
If you received a penny for every time you told yourself "I love you", would you be rich?
This self reflecting question hit me like a brick to the head, I was lost in thought for a long minute as I relaxed on the couch after a long day. The more I thought about answering the question, the more I was justifying my answer. "You see, I would not necessarily be rich but that's because. . ." and the excuse goes on.
What was your first response when you read that quote? was it a whooping Yes or were you like me, thinking about your response?
Self love is the greatest love of all, it is so great that if you loved your family, friends and neighbors the same way, there'd be no higher level of love you could possibly give them.
Do you go hours, sometimes days without taking time to appreciate yourself? Is there someone you give a higher acclamation than you do yourself? If you answered yes to either question, then you know exactly how I feel.
Learning To Love:
Tell Me Two Things That Make You Happy
The Everyday Routine
At the end of each day either on my drive home or while unwinding, I reminisce on how I had spent that day. What I did right and what I could have done better, the goal of doing this is to make me conscious of myself and find out opportunities for improvement.
You'd agree, it is better for you to find out your shortcomings and fix them than for others to draw attention to it.
We understand the importance of self improvement, the importance of being the best "you" possible, but where do you start? and more importantly when do you find time?
The daily routine for the average person is quite loaded with to-do's, places to go, people to meet, your day could be so packed you eat while walking or driving, you text or call people while doing something else just to stay on top or even get dressed and leave the house without a shower, life as an adult is not on easy street.
We are not used to easy, even on weekends and off days, there's still that one thing that needs to be done and another one thing that needs to be done right after. We are tough, we can take life beatings, we already do it every waking day. Have you noticed there's always something? Try figuring out solution to a problem, while you're at it you'll find out another problem that needs solution.
We Are Soldiers! Yes, you read that right. We might not wear military uniforms and get shipped off to a foreign land but we are soldiers. Fighting for a cause, constantly in a hurry to achieve goals and dreams. The first goal being getting out of bed e-v-e-r-y single day and if you're like me you'd agree that your alarm clock can be one annoying friend.
We start our day, ready for duty, trying to figure out just how we would accomplish all the goals and responsibilities we've set for ourselves.
We strive, we're loyal, we make things happen but in order to continue our duty as soldiers we have to remember the only thing that matters at the end of your life is your happiness, the only person that would matter is you.
Our life is filled with relationships right from when we were born and apparently even if we want it or not, we are tied to some kind of relationship till we die.
Relationship with parents
Relationship with peer group
Relationship with a lover
Relationship with our children
Relationship with business partners
Being the soldier that we are, juggling all these responsibilities and stress from just being alive, some relationships fall back. It could be relationship with the spouse, children, friends or in most cases relationship with ourselves but one or two relationships would fall back.
I remember one of my counselling sessions, the acquaintance I was talking with did not know we are supposed to create and nurture a relationship with ourselves and I wont be surprised if there's a lot more people who share this mindset.
It is very easy to fall into a cycle of not knowing what you like about yourself. It is very easy to not know yourself at all but always remember it is quite as easy to know about yourself, to like and love yourself.
In simple English: There is no other person as wonderful as you.
I have carefully arranged the different steps I take to find my way back to self love when I get lost in the continuous cycle of Life and I encourage you to take these easy steps to remind yourself just how awesome you are.
It's ok, whatever it is that made you worked up, whoever it is that gets on your last nerve, wherever it is you have to reach to attain your goal, know it is ok to breathe.
Take in a deep breath, hold it in, count 1, 2, 3 then exhale.
Do it now:
Tilt your head back, nose pointing up. (For a higher effect, close your eyes), inhale, "I am happy", exhale.
Continue until you can not remember the exact time on the clock.
Our life is filled with noise. So much noise you have to do something drastic to get people to shut up only for them to start talking again. Separate yourself from the noise and the best way to do that is to:
1. Reduce the amount of words you speak. The less you talk, the better you are. Try it.
2. Reduce the arguments you engage in. The less you stir up fight or flight emotions, the more relaxed you are.
3. Quiet your mind. The war on the outside is no match to the riot on the inside. Do not forget that.
Stare in the mirror.
Go into a bathroom, admire who you see, focus on the attributes and good side of who you see.
Repeat awesome reassurance to the reflection you see.
"I am the best"
"My God, I look so handsome/beautiful today"
"Look at those eyes"
"If I didn't already know how amazing you are, I'd be taking you home right now".
Do You Know Everything Is Possible?
I'd leave you with these thought inspiring quotes I wrote:
"The only person who can love you like you is you."
"When you love yourself enough, others love you enough."
"The first person you say I love you to, is you."
"The more cash you have in your wallet for you, the more you have to give. Same way, the more love you have in your heart for you, the more you have to give."
Let's both take a pledge: 'I would consciously love myself at every turn in life. I'm in, are you?
© 2015 Famous Steve