Don't Let Despondency Cloud Your Thinking
Adapting to Change
No one likes being caught unprepared by sudden changes as smooth transitions are always easier to cope with. It's often too much of a jolt to the system to have to deal with unexpected change but it calls for level-headed thinking nonetheless.
Even positive changes like winning the lottery can have negative connotations that leave winners unable to cope. If your thinking remains too clouded or negative for too long before you adjust to sudden changes it may well take its toll on your health and fitness and create a domino effect in other areas of your life.
The one thing you must never do is ignore that the changes have occurred and just carry on as normal. If you do this you'll just be temporarily shielding yourself from the situation rather than adapting or trying to find a workable solution. This often happens when people suddenly find themselves in debt. The bills won’t stop coming by some quirk of fate so get in touch with your debtors and explain the situation – they may be more sympathetic than you think and even be willing to suggest a more realistic payment plan to help clear your debt.
Some people have a built-in reluctance or resistance to change that makes it more difficult for them to deal with profound changes that occur suddenly. If you're one of these people, you may find that flexibility and adaptability never come easily. Teach yourself to embrace changes rather than resist them. A positive adjustment in your thinking will ensure you survive any crisis that sudden changes bring about. Remember that taking things one day at a time and adapting to changes at your own pace is by far the best approach and will allow you to deal with your thoughts and feelings more adequately in your own way rather than allow yourself to be pressured by others.
You may be stubborn or even rebel because you want things just to stay the way they are but change is an inevitable part of life and whereas gradual changes often go unnoticed, an unforeseen event that happens rapidly often calls for equally rapid adjustments in your thinking and lifestyle.
Changes that can’t be reversed like the unexpected loss of a loved one or a job can leave you feeling hopeless and helpless and every individual must formulate a coping mechanism that works for them to get them through their particular crisis or loss. What works for one person will not necessarily work for another.
Changes can be disruptive at the time but once dealt with by calm and logical thinking, the eventual outcome can often be positive or even beneficial, for instance, if you're made redundant and then a better job is found.
If a close family member dies of old age you may get an announcement of a new addition to your family shortly afterwards; of course, no one person can replace another but the thought of one life beginning as another ends is some consolation.
Belief structures such as Buddhism teach of the impermanence of everything and there are wise lessons to be learned from this ideology. In the great scheme of things everything changes; nothing is forever and this must be anticipated and accepted by all.
Try to accentuate the positive rather than dwell on the negative; this will help you to let go of the past, adapt to unforeseen changes and move on with your life.
Developing your own set of coping strategies to deal with sudden change is character-building and can make you stronger even when you're at your lowest ebb. Think of your long-term well-being however lousy you may be feeling right now. A life-changing situation that has never happened to you before will always be daunting but can make you better prepared if a similar incident ever happens again.
Adapting to something as life-changing as a sudden disability can present an additional set of problems because they are physically as well as emotionally based. In this case, an adjustment in your thinking is only half the battle. Take advice from your health care professionals and accept any counselling offered so that you're better equipped for changes in your life.
If you miss someone who is suddenly gone from your life, never to return, you have to be realistic and accept that the change is irreversible. Cherish your good memories and the happy times you spent together but move on. Make new friends and acquaintances who can help you pass the time and distract you from your feelings of loss. Dwelling on what might have been isn't conducive to the positive thinking strategies that will provide you with some hope of a rewarding future.
© 2015 Stella Kaye