i severely self harm myself without reasons that i kno.why is this?
Mandy there could be several underlying reasons and to get a prognosis via hubpages is probably not the best course of action. I watched a movie years ago called The Secretary which was a fabulous portrayal of a person who self harmed. The depth of emotion is phenomenal and the need to be 'matched' also is portrayed.
But to get the real and concrete reasons for this condition a doctor or psychologist would be a good place to start.
It is impossible to tell you specifically why you are self harming, the reasons may change from situation to situation as well as changing from person to person. There are 'common' reasons for people to self harm. Commonly self harm is a coping tool, with life gets to be too much and we don't have any other way to cope self harm can be the only coping tool we have. Self harm is also closely related to control, when we feel we have little or no control over our lives self harm can give that sense of having control over something. Dissociation is very common with self harm and it is my belief that when we dissociate it is because we have encountered something we don't know how to deal with or respond to. By dissociating we are in a way 'protected' from whatever has happened that is upsetting but it leaves us feeling out of control and confused. Dissociating can be an automatic response that becomes more upsetting then whatever is triggering it and then self harm becomes the way to 'feel real' again. For someone who is suffering with all this stuff, is scared of what is happening and wants to find a way out, I would suggest looking for a DBT trained therapist. I suggest DBT specifically because it is aimed at helping to learn new coping skills to replace self harm (other therapies over look the need for something to replace self harm) and focuses on understanding the present day triggers as opposed to re-living traumatic experiences. Re-living traumatic experiences is actually somewhat dangerous if you are no better equipped to deal with it now then when it happened as it will just traumatize all over again. I hope that you are able to find the right supports to help you understand yourself better and thus take real control of your life, without needing self harm anymore
I've delt with this commonly in my life and others...mostly the response is if we cant show our pain any way we know how...so we show it on our skin, even if we cover it up. I implore you, find a another way to let it out. Hit or scream into pillows, breathing exercises, meditation or therapy. Those scars are permenant. You can work through the ones in your head. Just breathe.......
It could depend on your past, your current situation and the things that you are going to face in your future. Normally self harm is used as a way of copy because you can't deal with them difficult feelings and feel that you can not open up enough to people to tell them. I also self harm and have been for over 5 years now, so please don't feel you are alone in this, if you would like to take a look at my hub which explains all about self harm and how to help yourself.
Good luck and stay strong!
I believe in you!
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