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How to Overcome Shyness - Tips to Keep in Mind

Updated on July 20, 2013
Stop hiding behind a mask.
Stop hiding behind a mask. | Source

Overcoming Shyness

Back in the day, I was one of those kids who were so quiet in class, not mingling with classmates, and just waiting for the bell to ring so I could go home. I have always told myself that my being shy was largely due to my father’s reserved nature. I couldn’t explain it; I just felt shy whenever I was in a room full of strangers and I could feel my face become warm and red for no apparent reason. But I have come to accept that character of mine and as I grew up, I realized that shyness became less and less of a problem. I found myself asking what I did that allowed me to overcome shyness and to be honest, it took me a long time to figure it out myself.

Is Self-Confidence All You Need?

Many people would tell you that self-esteem is the key to get rid of shyness. But is it really all you need? While self-confidence is indeed important when learning how to overcome shyness, it’s not the magic formula that you are looking for. You can be confident with yourself yet still find yourself trembling when put in front of a crowd. Nevertheless, building self-confidence is a great start because this process allows you to know yourself deeper. You realize your strengths as well as your weaknesses. Once you have done this, it’s time to consider changing things for the better.

Stop Reading Minds

One of the primary causes of shyness is fear of living up to other people’s expectations. You constantly think of what others might say about you and you end up feeling down and unwilling to continue. But you are no mind-reader; no one is. Instead of thinking excessively about other people’s thoughts, focus on yourself. It’s not your job to meet the expectations of others; it is your job to find your happiness. You can only achieve this by knowing and expressing yourself, unmindful of the comments people might throw at you. Stop making stories inside your head and just take command of the things you have complete control of.

You Have Something to Offer

It’s extremely important for you to realize that you have something to offer to others. Shyness just serves as a hindrance to help other people. Realize your self-worth and your value to others. Let this serve as an inspiration for you to overcome shyness and let your voice be heard. Slowly get out of your comfort zone and expose yourself to situations you couldn’t think you could handle. You have to face your fears and trust yourself.

Step up and let your voice be heard.
Step up and let your voice be heard. | Source

It’s About Understanding

You have to realize that in most cases, the problem is not with you; it’s with the people around you. People tend to be judgmental in nature and there are those who are not afraid to voice out their thoughts and opinions, whether positive or negative. So what do you need to do? The simple answer is to understand. This is perhaps the most important thing I have realized when trying to learn how to overcome shyness. I found myself more compassionate and understanding of other people. Just think about their situations and tell yourself that there is a reason why they act as such.

All of the things mentioned above all boils down to this. You do not have to read their minds and make stories as to what they might be thinking of you. You do not have to confront and argue with them. It’s all about getting in front and expressing yourself, knowing that you are not stepping on anyone and understanding any feedback you receive.

Remember that letting shyness get the best of you severely limits your potential as a human being. You might not be able to perform things that would be beneficial to you and to others. Start now, know yourself, and learn how to overcome shyness.


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