The Taking of Innocence
No Longer A Victim
I had a traumatic experience happen to me when I was 9 years old. I was raped by an older boy that lived in my neighborhood. I did not tell my parents about this until I was an adult. I was afraid and ashamed. I thought it was my fault. He told everyone. It ruined my childhood. It caused me to be sexually active before my time.
I was teased and tormented by the other kids. It caused me to hate myself. I was depressed. I felt like I was all alone. I did real good job of hiding it from my parents. I hid it so much that I suppressed all of my feelings and was in denial.
It was not until this year that something triggered my memory and all of those emotions and feelings came out. I started having nightmares and flashbacks. I finally got the help I needed. I was told that I have post traumatic stress disorder because of what happened to me as a child.
Therapy has done wonders for me. It made me realize that I am no longer a victim but I am a survivor.
I just wanted to share a poem about what I experienced on that day.
The Taking of Innocense
Shhh....be quiet no one has to know.
How he took you and hurt you years ago.
Come on he said it will be okay.
It's like a game we both can play.
Your not developed yet so it won't matter
In my mind I started getting sadder and sadder.
I followed him on my bike to a place near my house.
We creeped into the weeds being as quiet as a mouse.
Damn the grass! Damn the trees!
My bike dropped as he made me get down on my knees.
All I can remember is going home.
Feeling empty and all alone.
I was only nine.
And my innocence was no longer mine.
