Celebrating Any Holidays on Your Own and Enjoying Yourself!
How to Overcome a Blue Holiday, if You are Alone!
For many of us, the special holidays are a time of joy with family or just being with someone special, like Valentine's Day. However, for some of us, it just isn’t that joyous because, for one reason or another, we find ourselves celebrating the holidays alone. Our friends are off celebrating their own relationships.
Is that any reason to get depressed during those special days? Not necessarily so.
When I was widowed, years ago, it was with certain dread I faced those first significant days alone.
Valentine's Day was tough since my late husband was great at observing that day. There was always some token to express his affection.
I had great friends who included me in their celebrations, but, what was left of my family was far away and I did not have enough finances to take time off work to travel. Yet I did get through that sad time with some of the magic of intact.
Those times without a loved one are always difficult, make no bones about it. Grief takes it's time, but it wasn't to be my first and only celebration alone so I managed to find joy, peace and even happiness being alone.
I hope that whatever your reason for being alone or sad, there is something here for you to enjoy...and ponder.
Do not try to "Impress"...be yourself!
There are Many Reasons for a Blue Holiday
Life can throw us curve balls and widowhood is only one of many reasons one might feel blue, such as:
- No family to spend it with (students abroad for instance)
- It could be there was a death in the family that just takes the joy out of the celebration
- Lack of finances to properly enjoy celebrating ( i.e. debt)
- Poverty (lack of income)
- Spouse has to be away at that time
- Divorce or separation
- Depression with no discernible cause
Even the most solitary of us prefer not to spend Christmas or other holidays alone. While I enjoy solitude, I also enjoy family and friends and here I will give some of my personal hints for enjoying a holiday season.
Things to Do:
Even if your budget is severely limited, the fact, you are able to read this offers you some options to celebrate a Special time quietly.
Since I am blessed with an optimistic viewpoint in life, I have made the transition from childhood expectations of Christmas (which was wonderous) to the realistic expectation of what it really is...a time of crass commercialization and unrealistic expectation on the part of many adults who should know better. Reality does not depress me because I have my own expectation of Christmas and I retain the sense of wonder and temper it with my own reality whatever it happens to be at the time.
I set aside the Holidays as a time to enjoy myself. I do not leave that for someone else to do for me because that is courting disaster. I realize I will never meet those childhood fantasies of Christmas because i am way beyond fairytales.
However, I can enjoy myself as an adult by pampering myself...not trying too hard to meet other's unrealistic expectations and giving myself slack for not being perfect either!
So you can catch me humming Christmas tunes, watching a really sappy Christmas movie and decorating my potted spruce tree in my own fashion unlike the beautiful decorator trees around. It has to be a little imperfect! i have a cat after all!
Here are some simple ways to honor yourself and let a little joy in!
- Buy yourself something comfy or special "on sale" and and in advance... have it beautifully gift wrapped or do it yourself. Set aside.
- Cut flowers...order something nice or even pick up something from the grocers..as long as they are something you love!
- Get a few treats. Buy yourself what you can afford.
- My personal favourites are, a large, dark chocolate bar and a special frozen dinner entrée that I could enjoy without cooking. Food is what many celebrations are about so a special treat is a celebration. Buy what you can afford. When the day comes, savour it!
- On the special day, unwrap your present and relax and during the day enjoy the special treats. Linger after with mugs of coffee or tea and settle for a day of online diversions as found below to pass the quiet day.
Here are some online games that might entertain:
Free books online to load into your computer for your reading pleasure:
Music always soothes the soul. find your favorite music and relax listening.
Once you get tired of diversions you can sit back and watch a favorite movie on television… or a copy you have on hand. Maybe you have seen it a hundred times, but who cares... as long as "you" enjoy the movie!
Accept that this is your life now. Acceptance allows for transformation and the ability to move on to the next stage of your life. Acceptance allows you to take stock and realize what you truly need and what you need to let go of.
Perhaps, you may have even enjoyed this quiet time alone, refreshing your batteries and finding small joys in life! Large parties and expensive presents don’t always bring about the happiness you seek. Solitary celebrations can be very "spa-like" and re-juvenating for your psyche!
It is all about how you perceive that time alone. Resolve to value yourself and take enjoyment in the day, no matter what your circumstance. Do not assume large groups of people and lavish gifts make a for a happier you! Enjoy yourself.
You can celebrate alone. just try it...you will be glad you did !
Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas!
Give yourself the luxury of making Christmas special even if you are alone.