Little-Known Santa No. 16

No matter how you try, you’ll never be able to sneak up on Little-Known Santa No. 16 this Christmas Eve. This guy’s just too good at his job.

You see, he’s a shadow. A shamus. A sleuth. A gumshoe. A P.I. A slewfoot. A sneak-and-peek man. A bull, a bloodhound, a flatfoot, a continental op. He’s Saint Dick, and he specializes in tracking down all those guys that are really naughty, for all those honeys that are really nice.

So if you’re in need of some missing ice, a bird from Malta, those recently lost bearer bonds, a teenage runaway, your Mum’s antique candlesticks, or the filthy greaseball that hooked your niece on china white, just call on Saint Dick and his trusted gat (rod, rocket, piece, iron, snapper, shooter, persuader, firestick, cannon, widowmaker), and make a wish.