- Holidays and Celebrations»
Little-Known Santa No. 4
Here we see Little-Known Santa No. 4, Kwanzaa Klaus, exhorting his followers to unite in support of the racial and cultural diversification of the winter solstice celebrations.
“Why are there no Motown carols?” he asks. “Move aside that Christmas goose and green bean casserole, and make way for the collared greens and fried chicken! How come there’s a huge Christmas tree at Rockefeller Center, but none in the projects? Don’t you think I’d rather ride in a lowdown white Lincoln with spinners and a boomin’ sound system than some lame old red sleigh? Where are all the Thunderbird and lotto and menthol gift cards? Why can’t I find even one good blue-ray of the complete first season of ‘Sanford & Son’?”
(Kwanzaa Klaus’ son, head of the Neurosurgery Department at Johns Hopkins and father of a daughter recently accepted to Princeton — who considers his dad just a bit of an anachronism — keeps trying in vain to get him down off his gift box.)