My Daughter and the Salvation Army Bell Ringer and What They Taught Me About Christmas

I have a 42 year old daughter who was born with Down Syndrome. But thats where the "labeling" of Shannon should end. A lesson learned.

And so this happened today.

I took Shannon out to do her Christmas shopping.

Shannon saves her money every year to buy every, single person in our family, a gift. Its usually not much, because there are over a dozen of us including kids. But its important to her to be part of the gift giving and its her money which she earns by helping around the house and she looks forward to this trip every year.

We began at Hobby Lobby, then stopped and had lunch at Frisch's and then we went to (cue the Christmas Vacation music when the grandparents ring the doorbell) Wal Mart (thud). for the record....Wal Mart has the power to make me a Grinch at Christmas.

We were walking up to the door and she noticed the Salvation Army bell ringer and instead of heading toward the front door, she turned and walked over to the bell ringer. I stood there, fighting back tears, because I knew exactly what she was going to do. She fumbled around in her purse, pulled out her wallet and began pulling out coins to drop in the bucket. One by one, quarters, dimes, nickels and pennies made their way into the red bucket until she had no change left in her change purse.

The bell ringer stopped ringing his bell. He and I looked at each other and both of us had tears in our eyes. OK..well..HE had tears in his eyes..by this point, mine were all over my face. He reached over and patted her on her hand and said "thank you". He said it several times. She smiled and said "youre welcome". I had to turn away because by then I really was making a fool of myself and had no tissues.

I dont know if I can put into words what I was thinking and probably what the bell ringer was also thinking at Shannon's gesture. Im guessing it would have something to do with the famous John Bradford quote: "there but for the grace of God, go I"

Shannon doesnt realize that shes anything other than the happy person she is. But I do and so did that bell ringer. And today, I felt like I was in the presence of something great and through Shannon, I was witness to the equality in all of us.

Shannon sees herself as "normal". So putting money in the Salvation Army bucket seemed perfectly normal. And she was right and I got a reality check when I realized it. I learned something beautiful from what many people would consider my "retarded" daughter.

The moment passed and we went into Wal Mart so that Mom could become a Grinch again.

I dont know how she knows about the Salvation Army bucket and putting money into it. I asked Mike tonight if she was ever with him when he had done it and he said not that he could remember. I dont ever remember her being with me either. She watches a lot of television, so thats probably where she got the idea.

It really doesnt matter how she knows about it. What matters is that today, a bell ringer and myself witnessed the truest and simplest and most beautiful meaning of Christmas.