ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel
  • »
  • Holidays and Celebrations»
  • Christmas

Santa Claus List

Updated on March 16, 2011

Christmas

Ah, Christmas time is here, happiness and cheer, fun for all that children call their favorite time of year...or something like that, right? Isn't that how the christmas carol goes? Yeah, Christmas is the happiest time of year, especially for children.

So, what if you could go back in time? Let your imagination wander for a bit and join me to that place of pure imagination. Where you see through the eyes of your younger self...as a child. Where mystical figures still exist such as the Tooth Fairy, the Easter Bunny, and yes even Santa Claus. However, this go around is somewhat different. This time I have some serious questions for you Mr. Claus.

Christmas Time is Here

Santa Claus: The Naughty/Not List

As a child, I always wondered how Santa tallied up his good/bad list. Was it a point system? Was it pure mathematics, where he came up with some type of formula? Did he meet up with the Almighty himself (pssst, God, what to you think about this one?). Either way, I never really understood this crapass system of his. I often saw rotten little brats get the best presents and shook my head in disbelief! Maybe it was a simple blindfold and Santa just randomly picked who was naughty or nice.

So, with this new and profound way of looking at the situation, I ask YOU Santa Claus...do you really check that list twice, big shot? Or how about this...have you been a good boy? Would you make the precious nice list?? I think not...you hypocritical, good for nothin, two-headed rotten snake! Or perhaps you would put on that infamous blindfold and magically appear on the list like all the other rift rats I see.

Santa Tell Me Why

I'm not bitter...well, maybe a little...I just want answers! Answer the little ten year-old boy, why oh why, did the rich kid who tormented everyone get the Super Nintendo, and I got a pair of socks and some Voltron tidy whities? Tell me why, I was made fun of in class for getting Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle sneakers, while the big snot received a brand new 10 speed bike? So, Santa wherever you are, hurry down the chimney, drink the cookies and milk and tell me why, oh why Santa why?

Comments

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • profile image

      jasonbrown 4 years ago

      santa clous thank in westlavgtinon old dairy beer jasonbrown

      santa coins

    • profile image

      mecy 5 years ago

      hi i love ya'll so much santa and mrs. clues

    • profile image

      matthew 5 years ago

      your the best santa l know'and i am so happy for you'am i on the nice list

    • profile image

      Brennan 5 years ago

      Hi Santa I am Brennan and cameron and courtnee.

    • profile image

      emily 5 years ago

      are you real

    • profile image

      crystal 5 years ago

      how is mrs claus

    • profile image

      omani stevenson 5 years ago

      hello santa this is jacimpea and otis daughter wish to a merry chrismats....

    • profile image

      shivani 5 years ago

      i love you

    • profile image

      haley 5 years ago

      i love you

    • profile image

      Jager 5 years ago

      santa you must no me Jager I wonder that yore reindeer have ben good

    • drej2522 profile image
      Author

      drej2522 7 years ago from Augusta, GA

      thank you, ladybird! I love to put new spins on a subject....

    • Ladybird33 profile image

      Ladybird33 8 years ago from Fabulous USA

      This is so interesting and unique,more importantly, makes me think (like Santa) when reading it. I loved it. You are very talented.

    • drej2522 profile image
      Author

      drej2522 8 years ago from Augusta, GA

      haha...thanks...dark humor rocks!

    • Stimp profile image

      Stimp 8 years ago from Upper Midwest

      Again, this one killed me....we have the same sense of humor....well, yours might be a bit darker....

    • drej2522 profile image
      Author

      drej2522 8 years ago from Augusta, GA

      ha, I don't know if I was a very good 'big' boy this year!...that's a toss up!

      Thank you for your post!

    • AEvans profile image

      Julianna 8 years ago from SomeWhere Out There

      This year Santa will give you everything you have always wanted but this time it will be the big toys for boys! Loved the hub! :D

    • drej2522 profile image
      Author

      drej2522 8 years ago from Augusta, GA

      ...no comment :)

    • mistywild profile image

      mistywild 8 years ago from Houston, TX (Proud Texan)

      Santa isn't real? lol.

    • drej2522 profile image
      Author

      drej2522 8 years ago from Augusta, GA

      thanks...I try :)

    • RedElf profile image

      RedElf 8 years ago from Canada

      Interesting! Short and sweet and lots of meat for discussion!

    • drej2522 profile image
      Author

      drej2522 8 years ago from Augusta, GA

      Thanks for all your posts here! I try to be fun and wacky, with a dash of thought provoking information. Thanks!

    • Mike Lickteig profile image

      Mike Lickteig 8 years ago from Lawrence KS USA

      Your hub is thought-provoking on many levels. This hub is entertaining and well-written, and it also raises questions about justice and entitlement. What does it mean to the ten year-old to see the rotten, spoiled rich kid get the Super Nintendo or the ten-speed bike? Where is the justice in that? (I probably sound bitter myself, huh?)

      I hope Santa is good to all of us this year. We can all use a break.

      Thanks for your post.