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Weddings: Flower Girls/Ring-Bearer? Should You or Shouldn't You?

Updated on October 6, 2015

Should You Have Kids In YOUR Bridal Party?

Here's the scoop on kids in bridal parties. They seem to come in two varieties. They're either shy as church mice, or they're hams who think your wedding is their debut on Broadway. Either way, the bride and groom can suffer.

The "church mice" are the kind that throw tantrums and burrow their heads in their moms' skirts, and are just too scared to make it up the aisle. The "hams" on the other hand, are in their glory and may even steal the bride's and groom's thunder. (At one wedding I coordinated, the ring-bearer and flowergirl sat on the steps under the altar and had a rousing conversation throughout the entire wedding ceremony. The congregation was in stitches.)

What's the Rules?

Flowergirls should be children between the ages of four and eight. The same for ring-bearers. You may have multiple flowergirls but only one ring-bearer and whatever you do, don't put the "real deal" on that pillow, or your wedding rings may not make it up the aisle. 

Children in Bridal Parties: Tips For Success

* If you decide to have kids in the bridal party, try to pick children whom you know can handle the stress or you're asking for trouble.

* Let the kids sit down once they make it up the aisle. Don't expect them to stand during the wedding ceremony. Have people in the front row whom they're familiar with, where they can sit.

* Let them go home after the wedding, or to the home of relatives or friends, where babysitting services are provided for those who bring their children to the wedding, out-of town guests, for example.

The key is to let the kids enjoy the wedding and reception as much as you do!

P.S. If you'd like to visit Deborah McCoy: www.aa-wp.com


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