~ A Nightmare On George Street ~

“ I’m gorgeous, I’m George, though a tad out of fashion,

For mommy has placed my attentions on ration.

No longer reign I, Thane o’er the living room stare,

Nor the cushy warm patch ‘neath her ‘ol kitchen chair.

Those victory gains which I captured by stealth,

Have been seized by a mutt, ‘tis affecting my health;

No longer, her knees, may I use as my ladder,

Argh!, cinnamon king is just making me madder!

I miss tasty treats, which I conned with a fawn,

As I kneeded her thighs which were made out of warm.

His puppy-doe eyes have now captured her heart,

Though I’ll soon make them cry with my dinner-time fart.

I harboured dark thoughts as I crept through the flap,

And did’st wee in his bed ‘fore I set my next trap.

He chased me, then swiped with a caramel thump,

So I sunk my sharp teeth in his plump chocolate rump.

Now hid in the corner and curled in a ball;

Ignoring the tins as my momma does call;

Should I jump in the washer, or run to the moors?

Commit harakiri with my under-sized claws?

Goodbye cruel world! Woe, I’m ending it all!

For I’m bailing this ship as I amble a crawl.

I’m crossing my paws as I vault from the ledge,

But my fall has been broke by our neighbour’s clipped hedge.

Grooming my pelt, furry pride sorely dented,

But glad that I leapt, for my anger is vented;

It’s hard to escape new emotional ties,

When the drop is three-feet and you’re blessed with nine lives.”

THE END