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12 pieces of advice for new parents

Updated on March 20, 2013
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To my daughter

You are on the brink of the most important experience of your life. Nothing you have done before will compare to it and this event will impact everything you do from here on after. Since I always feel like I want to pave your way, impart some pearls of wisdom to make your life easier, I put together this list of 12 things that sum up a lot of my opinion on making parenthood a little smoother! Of course, there are way more than 12, but I'll just leave those for another hub! So...in no particular order....I give you this:

“What it's like to be a parent: It's one of the hardest things you'll ever do but in exchange it teaches you the meaning of unconditional love.” ~Nicholas Sparks-The Wedding

1) Unconditional love

From the moment you knew that baby existed, you loved it. With all your heart and then some. You will always love your child, unconditionally. Conversely, don't let that love keep you from doing what's right for your baby.

2) Don't wish their lives away

What I mean is, don't hurry. Parents tend to run from one milestone to the next. Go slowly, savor. Enjoy the ride. It all goes by way too fast. If you try to rush it too much, you'll miss all the good things that are happening. Next thing you know, it'll be 20 years later and you'll be typing an advice article for YOUR kid.

3) Pick your battles

There will be many things you won't see eye-to-eye on. Try not to get too crazy about every little thing. Is it really that big a deal if he falls asleep before his bath or if her shoes don't match? Compared to some of the bigger things, these should be the least of your worries!

Ok, this may be carrying it a bit far!
Ok, this may be carrying it a bit far! | Source
well...even further!
well...even further! | Source

4) Don't sweat the small stuff

Just like in picking your battles, there are going to be lots and lots of little things from the learning to differentiate their cry to comparing milestones to choosing battles. Try not to get yourself too crazy! Your Savta used to love saying. "Don't worry! They won't still do it at their wedding!" She was right!

5) Don't make promises you don't have every intention of keeping

Even with the best of intentions, you may not be able to keep a promise so be certain that you only make promises that you are able to keep. Don't promise the moon unless you are planning to climb up there and get it yourself!

6) Don't be afraid to say "I don't know"

There is a wealth of opportunity to teach your child starting with: it is ok to NOT have all the answers and to teach them how to find them.Imagine the burden you will lift from their shoulders?

7) Don't feel guilty if you are a working mom

Just don't. It is what it is. Just make sure your time is quality time!

8) Don't feel guilty if you are a stay at home mom

Enjoy it. Don't squander it. Just make sure your time is quality time!

9) Make sure that the punishment fits the crime

Try to keep it in perspective. If they didn't do a homework assignment because they were watching too much TV, cut back on or stop the TV watching. You don't have to ground them for a week!

Source

10) And while we are on the subject of punishment

Remember that puinishment once given, has to be followed through with! That being said, make sure that the punishment/threats you make are enforcable to you, as well. In other words, don't tell them if they don't clean their rooms, they can't spend the weekend at Grandmas. Who is really being punished here if they don't clean their rooms?!

11) Read

Read lots and lots of books. Spark their curiosity. Sing, dance, laugh! Tell stories!

12) Be your child's best advocate!

Be their biggest fan, greatest admirer, staunchest supporter and peppiest cheerleader! You have, after all, given birth to the best kid in the world! Make sure they know it! There is nothing that child can do that will make you love it less. Be their protector in every sense of the word. Be fierce, if you must be, but never let them think that they are anything less than perfect!

This song sums it all up!

And so...

My wish for you is that you will have even half the pleasure from you children that you have brought to me. And of course, you already know this, but I hope you dance.

I already know that there are more things that I forgot to tell you but I'm not worried, I'll just write another one or two of these!

I love you!

One more thing....be prepared!

Canon PowerShot A2300 IS 16.0 MP Digital Camera with 5x Optical Zoom (Black)
Canon PowerShot A2300 IS 16.0 MP Digital Camera with 5x Optical Zoom (Black)

Make sure to have a good camera. You won't want to miss a thing!

 

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    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Useful and beautiful...a great daily double! My grandma told me not to sweat the small stuff and it's all small stuff. Looking back she may well have been correct.

      I'll keep this short; I have a ton of work to do for customers. Well done and so very important. Have a great week my friend and a Happy Thanksgiving.

    • btrbell profile image
      Author

      Randi Benlulu 4 years ago from Mesa, AZ

      Thank you, Bill for taking the time in this busy craziness! Yes, my daughter calls what she is doing "nesting" and I call this , helping her cushion the nest or...I'm just so excited, I have to keep myself occuoied for the next few months! Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours, as well!

    • mpropp profile image

      Melissa Propp 4 years ago from Minnesota

      This is excellent advice for new parents and not so new parents! In fact, its just good "life" advice that can be applied to most everyone. Congratulations to you on becoming a grandma soon!

    • rcrumple profile image

      Rich 4 years ago from Kentucky

      Randi - The one thing I would add here is to "Never discipline out of anger." I've watched parent after parent slap kids in public as they lost their tempers. If the parent can't control themselves with the years of experience under their belts, how can they expect the youngster to control themselves? Great Hub!

    • btrbell profile image
      Author

      Randi Benlulu 4 years ago from Mesa, AZ

      Thank you so much, mpropp for reading and your warm comments. It's interesting that you said "good life advice." I couldn't agree more. The way we behave at home is what teaches us how to behave everywhere else! Thank you again....soo excited!

    • cam8510 profile image

      Chris Mills 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO until the end of June, 2017

      Reading to my sons, and telling them stories, was indispensable in raising them. I can see it in them even today when they are 23 and 27.

    • btrbell profile image
      Author

      Randi Benlulu 4 years ago from Mesa, AZ

      Thanks, Richard for reading and for your suggestion. Watch for it in the next installment! I know there are several still to add!

    • chlxee profile image

      Chloe West 4 years ago from Charleston

      Love this! About to be a first time mom myself, so this is definitely helpful!

    • btrbell profile image
      Author

      Randi Benlulu 4 years ago from Mesa, AZ

      Thank you, chlxee! Congratulations! Such an exciting time for you!

    • Eiddwen profile image

      Eiddwen 4 years ago from Wales

      Only one word needed here"Beautiful!!!""

      Eddy.

    • btrbell profile image
      Author

      Randi Benlulu 4 years ago from Mesa, AZ

      Thank you, Eddy! Big sniles! Have a beautiful day!

    • CrisSp profile image

      CrisSp 4 years ago from Sky Is The Limit Adventure

      I like your 7 and 8, balances everything. I have another hub for posting (soon) and I'd like to link this hub with that. I'm sure that would be okay, but let me know otherwise.

      I always love the personal touch coming from your hubs.

      Excellent tips and advices. ♥

    • btrbell profile image
      Author

      Randi Benlulu 4 years ago from Mesa, AZ

      Cris, Thank you for reading and commenting. It would be my hnor to have you link this! I am going to send a few more out as her pregnancy developes or as I think of them so it will be fun to join together to make it more comprehensive and more than one view point! Always good to have you here:) xoxo

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