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A Journey Of Discovery: Being Yourself and Understanding Who You Are

Updated on June 24, 2016

I've Discovered That I Balance Out Just Right...Nobody's Perfect!

How do we find a balance in life? More importantly, how do we balance ourselves in order to be happy in order to have balance in life? That was a mouthful, but when you think about it, isn't that the key of life; to discover how to be happy with our good and bad sides? To me, it's all about trying to make sense of just who I am and finding peace with myself. I can do that most days, although it is hard for some people to grasp the person I am.


I'm not going to lie; I am difficult to figure out. Most people think I'm struggling internally all the time. I am struggling, but I find days of peace, and I have focus on who I am. I have learned how to appreciate myself for, as I mentioned earlier, my two sides. I realized it wasn't about trying to be this perfect ray of light all the time. It was more about embracing the fact that I couldn't be that and talking myself through the dark side of who I am and enjoying that side along with the bright, sunny, me. In doing this, I believe I have found that I like myself very much as a person. I don't worry much about being judged as I have mentioned several times in my hubs. I do, however, worry that some friends and family still stay concerned about me on a constant basis.


This brings me to the reason for this poem. I wanted to explain to everyone how I see myself, and what I truly think about the way I am. I know...I know...I do have some very dark poetry posted here that portrays myself as all down and out, and when I wrote those poems, I probably was going through some kind of personal turmoil. In that respect, I certainly understand peoples' concerns. Honestly, I just like to write poetry, and for the most part, my poetry is about life; more often than not, my own life. I don't know if that makes me a narcissistic person, but I feel that I write the subject I know best; ME. :)

I Am A Ray Of Light...

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A Fluttering Butterfly

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Some Days Are Dark

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Beauty can still be seen in the bad weather

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A Balance of One; Dear Manatita

© 2015 Missy Smith

Please don’t fret my

far-off friend, I do

know the light in its

complete and pure

radiance.


I walk outside and

the sun warms my

spirit, and splashes

hope upon my

existence.


I attempt to notice

every fleeting thing; the

little birds chirp, the

humming of the bees.


I feel in me that desire

for life, but then again,

so much has been taken

from my heart.


And though it beats and

knows pure love, peace

is what it seeks from

above.


I am not dark for an evil

scheme. The part of me

that’s overcast is forever

lonely.


Forsaken from past pain

I don’t really reflect too

Much, but I do remember

how it damaged and

bruised me beyond my

ascendance.


I have given into the pain,

given up on trying to

contain. It’s worthless

for me to do so, I’d

feel lost if not in my

limbo.



So, believe me when I

say; the light I do feel.

Though I must breathe

it in doses in order for

me to stay real.


Some days you may

catch me fluttering

like a butterfly,

sporadically joyous

up and down in flight.


The next day you could

see me quite sad, cleansing

my soul with tears and prayers.


However, please don’t fret

about this dear friend, I need

my frown as I need the sun.

They perfectly come together

in me to make one.

Do you feel you have a dark side and a bright side? Do you embrace both?

See results

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    • manatita44 profile image

      manatita44 

      2 years ago from london

      Yes, my Sweet Friend. You see, you understand. God is the only Guru. Much Love to your children and have a great weekend.

    • Missy Smith profile imageAUTHOR

      Missy Smith 

      2 years ago from Florida

      We are all ants trying to climb that giant mountain, Manatita. I think you are sort of a guru though. I think you are very wise, and try truly hard to guide others in spirit of peace. That's a guru, right? We are all prone to mistakes from time to time. God is the only one who has the privilege of being mistake free. :)

      Thanks again, Manatita

    • Missy Smith profile imageAUTHOR

      Missy Smith 

      2 years ago from Florida

      I can certainly relate to that aesta. The dark sometimes does not give us time to breathe it seems like. I think it's those times that I enjoy writing them out. It helps them disappear from my sight faster. :)

      Thank you for taking time to read my journey of discovery. ~Missy

    • manatita44 profile image

      manatita44 

      2 years ago from london

      Ha ha. So you're thinking of me? Very nice:) Still, I won't delude myself. I've said in so many ways that I'm only a servant. I try to inspire, to elevate; to reach the Heart. But I know that you are the Creator's disciple, not mines.

      The Truth is that I'm struggling just as much as you. I wish only a student's mind; beginner's mind; Zen mind. I'm no Guru and please pray for me so that I do not accept this role in this lifetime. I know that you are a dear Sister of the Spirit...God's child

      Do not think of me, my Love. I make mistakes. I'm an ant trying to climb a giant mountain. Much Love.

    • aesta1 profile image

      Mary Norton 

      2 years ago from Ontario, Canada

      I can relate to this and I am happy to embrace the dark side of myself. The more we accept it, the more they come to light. However, at time, I feel the dark keeps coming.

    • Missy Smith profile imageAUTHOR

      Missy Smith 

      2 years ago from Florida

      What a lovely comment. Thank you Gypsy. :)

    • Gypsy Rose Lee profile image

      Gypsy Rose Lee 

      2 years ago from Riga, Latvia

      Simply wonderful and most inspirational.

    • Missy Smith profile imageAUTHOR

      Missy Smith 

      2 years ago from Florida

      Thanks Deb! Yes, writing is most definitely my outlet for airing out my internal issues. It's been a true help in that area of my life. I love to share my vulnerabilities, as I mentioned to Jodah in response comment. I think everyone, if they feel they need to should open up to others this way. It really does release stress.

    • aviannovice profile image

      Deb Hirt 

      2 years ago from Stillwater, OK

      Yes, there is a balance in most lives between light and darkness. It can be trying to be happy and focused all the time. That's what writing is for, and you have certainly discovered that. Many writers have deep feelings that most people cannot even begin to comprehend, so it is best just to air out what you feel via one voice or another. Seems to me that you are surely doing that.

    • Missy Smith profile imageAUTHOR

      Missy Smith 

      2 years ago from Florida

      I do like to take my poetry to that uninhibited place that speaks a no holds barred tone. I want it real. I want readers to feel who I am. Thank you Swalia! That's a great compliment to me. :)

    • swalia profile image

      Shaloo Walia 

      2 years ago from India

      Simply beautiful Missy! You are never afraid of baring your soul and your innermost fears in your poetry and that's what makes you unique.

    • Missy Smith profile imageAUTHOR

      Missy Smith 

      2 years ago from Florida

      Thank you, emi sue for reading my poetry and for taking the time to leave a comment. I appreciate it and am very happy to meet you. I'm going to go to your page and check it out. Thanks again! :)

    • emi sue profile image

      Emily Lantry 

      2 years ago from Tennessee

      I do believe that there is a lot that people hide about themselves, even to stone of the people closest to them. I know there are times when I am blatantly guilty of this and sometimes it is harder to tell.

      Thank you for sharing your poetry!

    • Missy Smith profile imageAUTHOR

      Missy Smith 

      2 years ago from Florida

      You are certainly right in your opinion of this ladyguitarpicker. And I thank you for reading my poem. :)

    • ladyguitarpicker profile image

      stella vadakin 

      2 years ago from 3460NW 50 St Bell, Fl32619

      Everyone has two sides and each journey is different. Some people seem to get through easy, and others are hard. I do not know why, but it does make the person who we are suppose to be. Your poem is great.

    • Missy Smith profile imageAUTHOR

      Missy Smith 

      2 years ago from Florida

      I don't know if I know how to be any other way than personal with what I write, Mihnea. lol. Thank you for stopping in and reading my poem. :)

    • Missy Smith profile imageAUTHOR

      Missy Smith 

      2 years ago from Florida

      Thanks so much for stopping by whonunuwho. :)

    • Missy Smith profile imageAUTHOR

      Missy Smith 

      2 years ago from Florida

      I do know that you know my heart, Manatita. However, it came to me to write a poetic letter just to let you know that I appreciate the fact you push me a little. I respect your words of wisdom and I wanted you to see that I understand my path. :)

    • Missy Smith profile imageAUTHOR

      Missy Smith 

      2 years ago from Florida

      You just understand me so well, Dana. You totally get what I'm trying to convey. Thank You! :)

    • Missy Smith profile imageAUTHOR

      Missy Smith 

      2 years ago from Florida

      Frank, I think you understand well the dark-side people struggle with. Some, like how you portray your characters in your writing, get lost and let it consume them. Therefore, they turn evil. However, I feel if we embrace it and get to know it, understand it, then we will see a different beauty in it, nothing evil about it. Thanks!

    • Missy Smith profile imageAUTHOR

      Missy Smith 

      2 years ago from Florida

      You are very welcome, Venkatachari. I thank you so much for appreciating what I write here. God Bless! :)

    • Missy Smith profile imageAUTHOR

      Missy Smith 

      2 years ago from Florida

      So true Clive, if we don't look at our own lives as a journey of discovery, we will just get lost. Writing poetry is such a great outlet to find oneself. :)

    • Missy Smith profile imageAUTHOR

      Missy Smith 

      2 years ago from Florida

      The darkness brings out our raw emotion and I think that is so important to writing poetry. Thank you Bill. :)

    • Missy Smith profile imageAUTHOR

      Missy Smith 

      2 years ago from Florida

      Thank you, John. I really am glad you see this is all I try to do in my poetry; It is to write my thoughts down in the way I see and feel them.

    • Mihnea Andreescu profile image

      Mihnea-Andrei Andreescu 

      2 years ago from Tilburg

      Nice confessional poem.I like how personal it is :)

    • whonunuwho profile image

      whonunuwho 

      2 years ago from United States

      Nicely done my friend and your message is well received. whonu

    • manatita44 profile image

      manatita44 

      2 years ago from london

      Well, well, well ...sob, sob, sob ...

      My Sweet, I feel like butter, and perhaps I blush. What a cute, charming and elegant Hub! Full of Grace, modesty and style. A most exquisite and touching Hub!

      Missy, I like you, and frankly you do not need to tell me too much. I feel your Heart. It is precisely because of this that I 'push' you a little, but with a Spirit of tenderness as gentle as the lamb and as lithe as the butterfly.

      Beautiful pictures, much effulgence in this Hub; great song and video. So appropriate! Missy my first stop was your poll, and yes, I did the last one.

      The Heart ...the Heart ... Love ...Light ...so, so, so meaningful! God bless your deep Spirit and wonderful and sincere Life. Praise be!

    • Dana Tate profile image

      Dana Tate 

      2 years ago from LOS ANGELES

      On the path of discovering ourselves, we will definitely see a bright and a dark side. Some of the things we consider as dark or "negative" are really good qualities used incorrectly, such as anger, for example, is a good quality if it's used toward change, but negative if it's directed toward ourselves and other people. We are definitely not perfect, but I like to think of us as, perfectly imperfect

    • Frank Atanacio profile image

      Frank Atanacio 

      2 years ago from Shelton

      I'm not dark from an evil scheme..... I like this entire little section kind of whipped poetic.. good hub Missy

    • Venkatachari M profile image

      Venkatachari M 

      2 years ago from Hyderabad, India

      I think nobody is completely perfect and nobody is full of only bright side. Life is a mixture of light and darkness. There are always ups and falls. Happiness and sorrow go hand-in-hand. So, we must always keep balancing things. You are perfectly correct in your perceptions of life and I appreciate you very much for this good quality. Blessings.

    • clivewilliams profile image

      Clive Williams 

      2 years ago from Jamaica

      Every human should really be struggling to figure out who we really are individually and collectively. There are so many things which as been hidden from man that even the hiders now are seeming to forget where they hid it.

      The struggle to identify oneself is real

      No one can truly tell how you feel

      Sometimes the pain comes in colorful rhythms, pounding in deep

      makes you cry, want to hide, drivers out the lion and leaves the sheep

      But as our soul seeks its own answers it drives the physical to push on

      Going forward on a bitter sweet journey, oh so long

    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 

      2 years ago from Olympia, WA

      I agree with John, this is a very honest look at the human condition....I embrace my dark side, especially in my writings....it adds character and depth to my work.

    • Jodah profile image

      John Hansen 

      2 years ago from Queensland Australia

      A very honest and well written hub ad poem Missy. You are one of the best here at baring your soul, and it's good to see you truly understand yourself. Who can dispute the validity of what you say here " I feel that I write the subject I know best; ME. :)"? Everyone says write about what you know, so you are doing exactly that. Well done.

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