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A Letter to my Soul

Updated on November 19, 2011

To the rescue,

My soul Knight.
My soul Knight. | Source

Soul thoughts

My Dear Soul

You and I have rubbed along nicely for many years now, so many years in fact that I will not say, as a true lady never divulges her age. Now, we have had our rows when my brain told me to be strong, or my heart waltzed on through life regardless of what ever happened. We have shared ups and downs, had our troubles, especially when the happy pills stopped working. You remember don’t you when I wanted to go one way and you another, we couldn’t agree? But, despite all of this you kept me grounded. You told brain to visualise my dreams, you nurtured my heart when it felt fit to burst, but most of all, you offered me insight and the confidence to grow.

Do you remember the many times that I questioned my beliefs, the many arguments I had with my faith? The times when I loved and lost, and all those times I allowed people into my life. You talked to me and told me to be steady. “Don’t make rash judgements that will come back and bite you on the ass”, you said. Did I listen, no I never did?

My heart has always over ruled my head, you told me so. And yes, you were correct. Brain taught me to dream and live with my own demons, huh, how many times have my little demons stopped by to play? You were there, always tightly in control of the reigns. Oh how I wanted to shout and cry and play the woman scorned, but did you allow me too? No indeed you didn’t. Just as my little claws came out to scratch at the surface of pain, you reined me in, whispering in my ear. Tapping on my shoulder before banging my head on a brick wall, you told me “self pity is not an admirable trait. Jealousy is an ugly emotion, and fear is the sad state of affairs that I alone put myself into. Soul you are my wisdom.

Oh, I still dream of the impossible. I still fantasise about the handsome Knight on the white charger, but soul tells me “knowing you as I do, he will be riding a chestnut mare in season and get unceremoniously dumped in the manure, his suit of shining armour turning to rust.” Brain wants to challenge his thinking and answers “a rusty suit of armour is better than no suit of armour,” and as for heart, she just blinks and flashes the arteries in the hope of a sexual conquest.

My dear soul, you have schooled me well, because today I still leave my heart open and my brain still tells me to tread carefully, but you my friend; your knowledge and wisdom keeps me alive.

My eyes show me what my brain tells me I cannot have. My heart beats like the rhythm of a drum, bump bump, bump bump, especially at the thought of tenderness and love, but you my soul are the ears to my world, my cradle of life and my giver of reason; the very reason why I love to love as I do.

Don’t ever allow me to dry up and become bitter, I might just miss something wonderful and powerful, or and my knight in shining armour may only turn out to be a fool in the dust.

I love my soul, and I love the souls of all my dear friends whose love and support gives my soul strength to keep teaching me.

Do you love your soul? Here is to soul loving every day in every way, and for as long as we all remain on this planet Earth, which we call home.

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    • Eiddwen profile image

      Eiddwen 

      6 years ago from Wales

      What a wonderful hub and I vote up up and away here.

      You are such a natural in the way you breathe life into your writing

      Take care and have wonderfull day.

      Eddy..

    • marcoujor profile image

      Maria Jordan 

      6 years ago from Jeffersonville PA

      Nonsense? Why thatsa bunch of 'manure' (what did you think I would say...)

      #1-- I LOVE your SOUL too. (Your heart isn't half bad either...)

      #2-- I LOVE how you 'work yourself', how you keep stretching, growing and thriving. It is sooooo addictive, almost as if your SOUL is trying to tell me what to do (not that there's anything wrong with that...)

      You never cease to amaze me. Yeah, that soul is in fine working order! Voted UP & UABI and Yowsa (just winging it), mar.

    • Movie Master profile image

      Movie Master 

      6 years ago from United Kingdom

      You gotta love your soul!!!

      I just read your comment above, how could you have thought this nonsense??

      It was so clever, I loved it and voting up

    • RealHousewife profile image

      Kelly Umphenour 

      6 years ago from St. Louis, MO

      Very nice bluestar! And oh so interesting. I am so glad you decided to work off the writers block with this. Up and awesome!

    • thebluestar profile imageAUTHOR

      Annette Donaldson 

      6 years ago from Northern Ireland

      Oh my sweet friend Martie. Your comments always bring a smile to my face. I am so glad that you liked my little bit of nonsense. My soul was very grateful to get the recognition lol

      Lucid? No, not for a while at least, it is great to feel some abandonment from my dark feelings for a while. x

    • thebluestar profile imageAUTHOR

      Annette Donaldson 

      6 years ago from Northern Ireland

      My darling friend epi, the most gracious knight in any armour, you are truly amazing. mwah.

      Colin you are such a gentle and creative soul, you are my light in the darkness and my shadow when the sun is too hot. Thank you again my friend for all your supportive comments. xx

    • MartieCoetser profile image

      Martie Coetser 

      6 years ago from South Africa

      Annette, I enjoyed reading this so much, and I will smile for the rest of the day for this paragraph because it is so blatantly true:-

      Re: knight in shining armour - "... soul tells me “knowing you as I do, he will be riding a chestnut mare in season and get unceremoniously dumped in the manure, his suit of shining armour turning to rust.” Brain wants to challenge his thinking and answers “a rusty suit of armour is better than no suit of armour,” and as for heart, she just blinks and flashes the arteries in the hope of a sexual conquest...."

      Voted up to where lucidity reigns.

    • epigramman profile image

      epigramman 

      6 years ago

      ......nothing like a little blue star soul to get my day going especially when it comes in the divine form of someone as lovely as you. You really wear your poetic heart on your sleeve with this personal hymn and sojourn and that for me is the infinite beauty about your writing - your sensitivity and your honesty.

      Just woke up in darkness here by the windy lake at 6:35am - will sit up for a bit and watch the daybreak, have a little bit of coffee and a couple of chicken pies.

      Sending you warm wishes for a glorious Sunday my most glorious friend.

      lake erie time ontario canada 6:38am

    • thebluestar profile imageAUTHOR

      Annette Donaldson 

      6 years ago from Northern Ireland

      Hi Cardissa, this little bit of nonsense was another challenge to get back to the keyboard from writers block. Sometimes when we think that we have nothing to share some little gem suddenly appears. I am so happy that you thought this nonsense worthy of leaving a comment. Much love to you hunnie. xx

    • thebluestar profile imageAUTHOR

      Annette Donaldson 

      6 years ago from Northern Ireland

      Good morning Fennelseed. You are very welcome to my little space in hub land. Thank you so much for your lovely comment. I love your chain of thought too, we have to laugh at ourselves before we laugh at each other.

      We humans all have the same traits and yet we think we don't. All I need to do is sit quietly and look around me to understand that lol

    • Cardisa profile image

      Carolee Samuda 

      6 years ago from Jamaica

      This is an ODE to soul. A tribute well deserved. It's amazing how you wrote about your souls as if it was another person, always there supporting, never leaving you and reigning you in when needed.

    • Fennelseed profile image

      Annie Fenn 

      6 years ago from Australia

      Oh WOW, soul loving, put like this, is a must for everyone. This is just awesome, lots of wisdom, lots of wit and loads of sensibility.

      Manure might be smelly but that's life. The perfect knight on the white charger is just pie in the sky stuff.

      Great writing, I have voted up and all cos this hub has it all. Well done, I will definately be back to read more of your work thebluestar.

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