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This is dedicated to my oldest daughter. When she was around the age of 3 or 4, she had a ton of invisible friends. This little story is dedicated to that part of her life.
Hi! I'm Ariga and I'm 8. I wanna tell you about my friends that I used to have when I was a kid. Having invisible friends can be such a pain in the butt and I'm so glad they aren't around anymore, they can never do anything right!
What can I say about my past friends?
Well, they did work but they had a bad habit of leaving my car at the mall. I dunno how they did it! Maybe they forgot they drove it and rode the bus back? Who knows but it was more than once I had to tell my parents that my car was missing again.
Man they left such horrible messes around my bedroom! That's why I made sure that they only came upstairs to play with me at certain times. Usually at night when my parents were asleep.
Oh don't worry, they didn't sleep with me. They slept in the basement. It wasn't my fault that it was a bit messy down there! They said they'd take care of it; but they never did those lazy bums.
What really upset me was that they always made a mess, I think I already mentioned that, BUT they never fessed up to it. I was the one always blamed. My parents never blamed my sister. Just because she was still in a crib and a walker doesn't mean that she couldn't have done it! I swear I didn't do it! *Sigh* They never believed me though.
So, I mentioned that they work right? Right, ok so they worked and the only thing they had to do was bring me their paychecks. That sounds reasonable doesn't it? Yeah, I thought so too but they sure didn't.
They expect to be able to play with me whenever I wanted them to, take the car to the mall AND not give me their checks? I don't think so.
Well, after a while of this, I got sick and tired of taking the blame for their messes and I got sick of my car being left at the mall so I got back at them.
When everyone was around the kitchen table one day, I told them to leave. While everyone just stared, I marched to that door, opened it and told them to leave.
Well, after much issues, they finally left. Of course they had to say that at least they get to keep their money!
So you see, the lesson of this story is this: Don't have roommates, invisible or not, they're not trustworthy.